Trials and Tribulations of Magic and Life
by Saerry Snape
Summary: My continuing series of HarryMurphy drabbles, now all in one place!
1. My Defending Angel

**Title:** My Defending Angel  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** We have fire and crispy-critters!  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse...roughly. Possibly somewhere after _White Night_ but with nothing of that in it b/c I doan have no copy yet. cry  
**Summary:** Harry and Murphy get cornered by vamps. Things proceed to get set on fire - as usual - and Harry has to get some sense slapped into him by Murph. Just business as usual...

* * *

There she blazed, an avenging angel with her sword at the ready and blue eyes aflame as she faced the vampires. Scarred but still standing with her head high and protecting those around her. Protecting me. 

Someone had gotten a hold of the recipe for ThreeEye and had brewed a batch of it. Then they had started going after witches and wizards, shooting them with darts filled with that wicked concoction. There had been three suicides already and five others were dead from a firefight that had broken out between them in reaction to their Sight overloading on them.

Most had gone into hiding, trying to solve the problem from there. Morgan – good old dour Morgan who still hates my guts – even told me to keep my head down.

I've never been too good at listening to people. And that's what got me shot. The Black Court vampires attacking us currently gave me a big clue to who was behind it too.

Problem with taking out the boss was the fact that we might not get out of our current situation alive.

"Harry?"

Murphy's voice quavered slightly as she spoke my name and I looked at her. The angel's bright face turned towards me and those blue flames of eyes were filled with worry and fear. All of it for me.

Made me feel like a real heel to make her worry so much.

"I'm fine, Murph," I insisted as I shifted back a step. Her back pressed against mine then and she stiffened before leaning against me. "Focus on the gnats."

She nodded at that and I looked at the vampires that were closing in around us. I really wish I hadn't. Under the Sight they were twisted mockeries of human beings, even worse looking than the Red's underneath their flesh masks.

Red's at least had proportions of some sort.

Black's under the Sight didn't get the courtesy.

One particularly twisted vampire lurched forward and I lifted my blasting rod reflexively, funneling power into it. As the tip of the length of wood began to glow red, the creature hissed at me and I smiled at it.

_I could help you, you know_, whispered a little voice in my mind then.

_Shut up_, I snarled back before shouting, "FUEGO!" The fireball roared out of the end of the blasting rod and slammed into four vampires before they could get out of the way, burning them…well, not alive but y'know. Another got his entire arm lopped off and came rushing towards me in anger, eyes blazing with a red fire.

Murphy's bullets caught him in the heart and the head. He crumpled with a little snarl and the blazing angel at my back snorted.

The whole mass suddenly tried us and I shook out my shield bracelet, bringing it up around the two of us as hard and fast as I could. Most smashed against it and staggered back; a few kept trying it. One vampire slunk away crying because its hand had gotten caught in the shield as it went up and was sliced off.

Aw, I made a monster cry again. Boo hoo.

"We won't last like this for long."

"Yeah," I said, frowning at the vampires. "I know, Murph.

She turned her head to look at me as she asked, "Any chance for reinforcements?"

My silence was her answer and she nodded solemnly.

"Thought so."

I bit my lip then said, "I'll get us out of this, Murph. Trust me."

She wasn't looking at me now but I could almost sense her smile.

"I know, Harry."

Then she cocked her gun and asked, "You ready?"

"As I'll ever be," I replied, switching my blasting rod for my staff with one hand. I thumped the tall length of wood against the ground and pushed a small amount of power into it. The runes carved into it began to smoke and I smiled.

I wasn't about to take the help of the fallen angel stuck in my head. But I wasn't going to waste the advantage I'd gotten from her being there.

"One," I said slowly.

Murphy tensed against my back and I swore I felt a phantom rustle of wings.

"Two."

The vampires tensed around us, the twisted limbs in my Sight writhing hideously.

"Three…FUEGO!"

I dropped the shield and thrust my staff out at a pack of the vampires in the same moment. Hellfire blazed to life in the runes and lashed out to consume whatever it touched in a blazing orb. Vampires screamed and died, fighting with each other as they sought to escape the blaze.

A vampire leapt at us then, moving down towards us too quick for me to get off another blast. So I turned and punched it, releasing everything built up in my ring as I did so.

It surprised me when the vampire's torso practically exploded. Ring hadn't gotten a lot of use of late but having that much power built up in it? Wow.

Murphy's gun suddenly clicked empty and the sound was far louder than it should have been with the roar of vampires and fire around us. I stepped up beside her as a vampire rushed her whilst she was going for another clip and thrust my staff into his face. There was a good bit of fury and anger behind it and he staggered back, bits missing from his rotted face.

Blue eyes blazed next to me and the angel lifted her sword, ready again. She smiled at me before she went after the vampires again with a snarl on her face.

As I shifted so we were back to back again and smashed my staff into another vampire's face, I realized something.

We were going to survive.

The Hellfire caught most of the vampires and burned them, hungrily eating them as well as the building around us. So…um…yeah, this building being set on fire actually was my fault.

The rest of the vampires? Well, I think Murphy took out more of them than me if you discount the Hellfire. The woman can kick some supernatural butt when she goes at it.

As we limped out of the building, something flashed out of the corner of my eye. I looked up and stared right into a mirror with my Sight wide open. The fire at my back and Murphy screaming at me got me moving again quickly enough despite the shock though.

We watched the old warehouse go down from a safe distance away, keeping out of sight of the newly arrived fire department. There was a long moment of silence then Murphy asked, "What did you see?"

I blinked, wondering how she'd known. Then I sighed and replied, "You don't want to know." I tried to move away from her but her hands gripped firmly on my arm and pulled me back. So I closed my eyes so as not to look at her.

Her hands, small and grimy, touched my face and I couldn't help it. I opened my eyes and look down at that blazing angel that had saved my worthless ass so many times.

"What did you see, Harry?" she asked again.

"Nothing like you," I breathed. "Nothing so beautiful."

"What. Did. You. See?"

"Monster."

Murphy blinked. Then she shook her head and stepped close to me, wrapping her arms tightly around me with her face pressed against my chest. I felt a little shudder run through her and reflexively wrapped my arms around her.

"Murph…"

"You're not a monster," she breathed.

I frowned at that and said, "The Sight shows the truth…"

"SIGHT BE DAMNED!"

Her shout staggered me and the tears that were in her eyes when she looked up at me with a vicious gaze did so even more. She reached up and grabbed my face with both hands, blue eyes ablaze with so many emotions that I couldn't comprehend them all.

Her voice was soft when she spoke again.

"I love you. Therefore you can't be a monster."

"Murph…"

She sighed and gently brushed her fingers across my face and through my sweaty hair.

"You can be such an idiot, Harry," she murmured, those fiery eyes soft. "I know you better than anyone and I know that you are no monster." Her fingers brushed across my lips, feather-light, and I closed my eyes as I kissed them. "I trusted you. Now you trust me."

Opening my eyes, I looked down at her and nodded.

"Okay."

She smiled and it lit up everything, reaching to the darkest parts of me than I hid from even myself.

Like I've said before, Murphy is good people.

My defending angel.


	2. Secrets

**Title:** Secrets  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Mild language  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse...sequel of sorts to _My Defending Angel_.  
**Summary:** Harry is being secretive over something thats happened and Thomas tries to get it out of him, ending up with a bit more than he bargained for.

* * *

"So what's got you acting all brooding, little brother?" 

I scowled and tried to continue reading my book, not wanting to respond to the question. That got it snatched from my hands and my brother's face thrust in mine.

"Harry," he said softly. "Talk to me."

Normally I might have opened up to Thomas. Today, however, I was feeling particularly childish. So I crossed my arms over my chest and glared grumpily at him.

And I resisted the urge to stick my tongue out at him, thank you very much.

Thomas sighed and straightened, still holding my book captive in his hand. "Well," he said, "it can't be that Murphy broke up with you."

"No," I said stonily, not wanting to have this conversation. I looked pointedly at the book in his hand then back at him. "Can I have my book back?"

He ignored me. Always heard older brothers did that when they wanted to make a point. Damn them.

"Maybe Mister died?"

"No."

"Mouse got lost?"

I looked pointedly at the lump of fur near the fireplace then towards my book again.

"Can I have my book?"

Thomas stroked his chin and mused in response to that. Damnit, ignored again.

"I know!" he exclaimed then. "Molly broke something."

"Of late no. Can I have my book?"

Plea ignored. I swear if he hasn't my brother, I'd punch him for this.

"So, not a breakup, loss, death, or breakage. Hmm…oh, I know! Bob caused a mass orgy again."

"He wishes," I snorted without humor."

"Well then…"

My temper decided to snap then and I lurched to my feet with a snarl twisting my lips. Thomas stumbled back a step as I do so…I must've looked really angry.

"Murph's pregnant, okay?!"

The outburst served to take everything out of me and I collapsed bonelessly back into the chair. My brother just stared for a moment then breathed, "Jesus, Harry. I thought you two took precautions."

"Sometimes shit just doesn't work," I snarled. Then I sighed and closed my eyes. "What am I going to do?"

Thomas' hand slapping my face in response was unexpected. My eyes flew open in reaction and I was surprised by the fierce look on his face.

He snarled, "You're going to be a father, that's what you're going to do. And Murphy's going to be a mother. I'll be an uncle and Molly'll spoil the kid rotten. Oh, and ask the woman to marry you, damnit!"

"Its not that simple…"

"_Bullshit!_"

I scowled and hissed, "What if she doesn't want to have it, Thomas? Did you think of _that?!_"

My vampire brother rolled his eyes and picked up the phone. "Call her," he said. When I didn't take it from him immediately he hissed, "Jesus, little brother, we're talking about your _child._"

I stared at him then reached out and took the phone from him, leaning over to dial Murphy's number. On the fifth ring I nearly hung up then she answered, her voice sounding shattered and rough.

Had she been crying?

"Hello?"

"Hi, Murph," I breathed.

There was a pause at the other end of the line and I was afraid she was about to hang up on me. Then she said, "God, Harry. You scared me."

"I panicked." I sighed and continued, "I'm afraid I'd ruin a kid, Murph."

"Harry…"

"Little brother," breathed Thomas in response to that, concern in his face.

Murphy sighed at the other end of the line then asked, "I'm going to have to beat some sense into you again, aren't I?"

I blinked, really confused now.

"Um…maybe?"

"_Fuck, Harry!_"

Her outburst made me jump and I ignored Thomas' sudden smirk.

Murphy growled, "I love you, idiot. And, so help me, if you don't get over this little stint and act like you're supposed to, I'm going to beat it out of you."

From any other woman that would have been a mild threat but Murphy has beaten my stubborn ass too many times for me to count. She could definitely do it again.

"Yes'm."

"Harry," she said in a softer voice then, "you're a good man. And you'll be a wonderful father."

"Y'think so?" I queried, not really believing it. I hadn't had the best role model during my young life after my dad had died.

I could sense her smile as she answered, "I know so."

Hearing Murph say that made me feel better…just like talking to her always made me feel. I felt like a real heel now for having hung up on her earlier in my panic. And for making her cry like I thought she had but she'd never confess to.

"Murph," I said softly.

"Yes?"

"Mind if I come over?"

There was a pause then I sensed that smile again.

"Please do," she breathed. Then she hung up and I scrambled to my feet, slamming the phone down onto its cradle hard enough to wake Mouse.

Thomas smirked at me and offered my book mockingly.

"Want this back?"

"Fuck the book."

"Thought so," he said. As he set the book down on the couch and went to wander into the kitchen I stopped him.

"Thomas."

"Hmm?"

"Thanks."

He laughed at that and waved a hand at me. "Shut up, little brother, and get going," he said warmly.

I nodded and watched him walk into the kitchen, waiting until his back was turned. Then I reached into the pocket of my jeans and pulled out a worn little ring box that had been there for a few weeks. It was the same box I'd offered to Susan years ago and much as I'd wanted to buy a new one, I just hadn't had the money.

And I'd been thinking about asking Murph the question since I'd started carrying it. Just hadn't gotten up to the nerve to.

Guess I had a reason to now.

Nodding to myself, I grabbed my staff and coat and headed out the door, shivering as I went.

I was going to be a father.

I was going to ask Murphy to marry me.

Hells bells.

I'm going to have a _family._


	3. Life Anew

**Title:** Life Anew  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for nerve-wracked Harry. Keep him away from things technological.  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse...sequel to _Secrets_ and _My Defending Angel_.  
**Summary:** His new family is about to get larger and Harry's a bit stressed.

* * *

There are some days when I hate being a wizard. That whole fiasco a year back with the Black Court getting their hands on ThreeEye and shooting several wizards with darts full of it (including my skinny ass) was one such day. 

Today is another.

I'm having a child…and I can't even be there to see it. Not because I don't want to – I do.

It's because I don't want to fry some old man life support or make something explode.

Like I said…some days I hate being a wizard.

This one is doubly hateful on the fact that it's November and the heater in the Beetle went out months back. Haven't had the time to go to Mike's and get it fixed either.

So I'm missing the birth of my child _and_ freezing to death.

Such is the glorious life of the wizard.

I could give you warmth, whispered a voice in my head. I've done it before. 

_Nothing but illusion_, I growled in response. _I'd still freeze to death eventually or get frostbite. So bite my ass, hellbitch, and get back in your hole._

Lasciel sniffed but retreated back to the depths of my mind where she usually lurked. Since I'd gotten together with Murph she'd become a bit less of the temptress. Still not very helpful but that's mainly my fault.

I wasn't about to risk my new family losing me.

Ten minutes later when I was debating over whether I still had toes or not, there was a rap against the hood of the Beetle. Grunting, I shoved half-frozen limbs about and climbed out of the car to blink at the intruder.

"Eh?"

"Lord, Harry, your lips are blue," said Michael by way of greeting. He reached out and grabbed my shoulder, saying, "Get inside before you freeze."

"I'm fine," I insisted. When my teeth clattered together and I discovered my hands were shaking I decided to relent. "On second thought…I'd like that warmth."

"But only just inside," I added as we walked towards the hospital after I locked up the Beetle. "I don't want to blow up someone's life support or something." Then I asked, "Is Murph okay?"

"With what I can get, yes. They won't tell anything to anyone but the husband."

I scowled at that.

"Her husband who can't go beyond the first waiting room. Yippee."

Michael sighed and laid a hand on my shoulder at that, saying, "Peace, Harry. Everything will be alright."

We walked on in silence after that and I was the one that spoke first when we entered the hospital and stood just off to the side of the door.

"I'm not even going to get to see them until I take them back home," I murmured, tucking my frozen hands underneath my arms within my cat. Michael looked at me then past me and out of the corner of my eye I saw a lamp in the waiting room flick then die with a spark. "Shit."

He surprised me by not even commenting on the curse.

"Harry…go home. I'll stay and call you when I hear anything."

"If I go home, I'm just going to worry myself silly," I grumbled. "I'd rather freeze in the Beetle."

Michael sighed again but seemed to give up and I welcomed the silence alongside the company. When Murphy had insisted on going to the hospital, I'd called him and asked to me us there. With my state at the time – and currently – walking Murphy in was nigh impossible. Light bulbs? Ha, earlier I could have taken out a whole floor.

One hour passed without much ado then another…and another. I debated calling Thomas but figured he'd decided to drop by and had found my place empty. He was smart and could figure out what had happened.

Molly made an appearance at some point and I woke from a light doze to find her sitting next to me, her hair actually its natural color for once.

Color me shocked.

"Your hair…" Ah, yes, me. Ever eloquent.

My apprentice just smiled at that and patted me on the head. If I'd been in a better state, I would have glared at her for it.

"Yes, Harry, its in its natural state for once. How's Murphy?"

"Dunno," I replied with a shrug. When my shoulders cramped at the motion, I grunted and moved the shrug into a full-on stretch. "I don't know if they even realize I'm here."

"Yeah, Dad told me you were waiting out in the car for an hour."

"With no heater," I added.

That made her blink then she looked up as a man who looked like a doctor walked into the room and looked around. At least that's what the stethoscope around his neck made me think he was. I don't tend to think too much when I'm in the hospital – too many drugs in my system to notice much.

"Mister Dresden?" called the man. "Is there a Mister Dresden here?"

"That's your cue!" chirped Molly and this time I did glare at her.

Rising to my feet, I carefully treaded over to him and waved slightly. He blinked at me then said, "Well then…I am happy to inform you that you're the father of a little girl."

The grin that spread across my face then might have blinded someone. Maybe even this guy because he shifted a bit nervously and looked like he wanted to back away from me. Huh, Murphy never seems to have a problem with my smile…

"And my wife?" I asked. "Oh, and when can I take them home?"

"She's fine," he replied, continuing, "And you can take them home tomorrow…no, this afternoon."

"Thanks."

When I turned to walk back towards Michael and Molly, he asked, "Sir…don't you want to go up and see them?"

I stopped in my tracks and sighed.

"Wish I could."

Then I picked up walking again and ignored his stare on my back. Michael stood as I reached them and asked, "Is everything alright?"

"It's a girl," I replied, my smile returning a bit. The return of the realization that I couldn't see them yet had lessened it but it was still there. "I can take them home this afternoon."

Molly let out a little squeal at that and leapt up to hug me, giggling as she did so.

"Oh, Harry, that's so wonderful! Can I come too? I want to see the baby!"

"I suppose so," I replied. Then I yawned and added, "Might need you. I don't think I'm going to be capable of driving."

"I'll drive you," said Michael. He then gripped my shoulder and said, "Now come along. You need to get at least some sleep that is not in a chair."

I frowned at that but let him steer me out of the waiting room and back out into the cold. As we headed towards his truck – 'cause I wasn't about to let myself get behind the wheel of the Beetle right now – I said, "I don't know if I'm going to be able to sleep."

"Try," intoned the Knight as he unlocked his truck.

The rest of the night, morning, whichever passed in a blur of colors and sounds. I vaguely remember being mauled by Mouse before I collapsed into bed, where Molly tucked me in. Sweet girl. Not sure how much sleep I got out of that though. I've become used to Murph lying next to me…without her there the bed is empty.

In the afternoon, I got woken up by Mister walking on my chest and managed to pull myself out of bed. After a can of Coke and a chicken sandwich Molly had gotten from some fast food place, I felt a bit more human and ready to face the world.

More specifically, ready to go and get my family.

Michael was kind enough to drive back to the hospital and I apologized halfway there when his radio turned to static. He just smiled and said, "Now there is no need for me to listen to her music."

"DAD!" exclaimed my apprentice in outrage, making me smile.

Could I look forward to exchanges like this someday?

Michael, the ever knowledgeable in this process, steered me to where I needed to go in the hospital. He assured me it was nowhere near anything that would hurt someone if I broke it, so I let him push me along.

I filled out paperwork that got shoved at me then we waited fifteen minutes for them to go and get Murphy. With a wheelchair. Um, gee, that's not going to go over well.

'Cause my Murph wasn't about to be wheeled out to us after what she'd just went through. If she did…I might die of shock.

True to form, Murphy came out to us walking with a look of fury on her face. Behind her stumbled one of the nurses that had gone after her, a stunned look on his young face. I might have wondered what she'd done to him if I hadn't become suddenly unable to think about anything but her and the tiny bundle in her arms.

She smiled at me, looking more beautiful in her rumpled condition than any other time I'd ever seen her, and walked over to me. The bundle in her arms twitched and she said, "Harry…"

"Stars and stones," I breathed, wrapping my arm around her. "Murph…" I leaned over and tweaked back part of the blanket to see my girl – and immediately lost my heart. "She's beautiful."

"You should have seen her when she made her appearance," quipped Murphy. Her blue eyes glowed with humor as she added, "I could have sworn she was screaming as loud as you do when you're injured, you big baby."

"Am not," I replied automatically, unable to tear my eyes from her. Then I turned and kissed Murphy's forehead, murmuring, "I love you."

She smiled and leaned her head against my chest, saying, "Love you too."

We stood there for a long moment then stared moving at Murphy's insistence – she had had enough of hospitals now for the rest of her life between this and every time she had to come because of me. Meaning coming because I was in one, not because she was hurt.

Me and my clumsy way of stumbling into things, heh. Its quite the, er, talent. I guess.

Michael drove us back in his truck as the Beetle was put down as the sort of transportation wanted for a newborn. So Molly got my keys and went puttering along in my car behind us. Made no difference to me. I was content sitting in the cab of the big truck with my arm around my wife's shoulders.

Molly cooed over the baby for a bit then left with Michael with a promise to be back in the next few days – both to see the baby and to get some more learning in. Ah, the joys of teaching magic.

Murphy looked up at me from where she sat on the couch and I sank down next to her, kissing her cheek as I settled. She turned her head to actually give me and kiss then asked, "You want to hold her?"

I blinked then nodded nervously.

"Yeah."

She showed me how to hold my arms then carefully placed our child within them. If I'd thought she looked small when Murph was holding her, she looked even tinier when I was.

"What are we going to call her?" asked Murphy leaning against my side.

I frowned and stroked a finger across my girl's cheek, marveling at the softness of it.

"Elizabeth," I replied in a soft voice. And the moment I said it, it fit.

Murphy nodded and said, "Elizabeth Margaret."

I blinked and looked at her at the mention of my mother's name and she smiled. "Why not?" she asked.

"Okay," I replied. And that ended that.

Elizabeth made a little murmur and I smiled, brushing my finger across her little cheek again. Murphy slipped her arm around my waist somehow and I turned to kiss her head as Mouse came up to get a whuff of a hello to his new person.

My family was home.


	4. Faerie Fire

**Title:** Faerie Fire  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for mild language and cute daughters.  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse...sequel to _Life Anew, Secrets,_ and _My Defending Angel_.  
**Summary:** Harry picks up his daughter for a day while Murphy's unable and gets a surprise along the way.

* * *

"DADDY!" 

A tiny wraith-like figure with a long braid of dark hair came rushing at me and slammed against my knees with the same amount of force as Mister as I entered her classroom. Luckily I've had practice with the cat doing that and can keep my balance.

Well…most of the time.

"Hi, munchkin," I said warmly, crouching down next to her. "You ready to head back home?"

"Uh-huh," replied my six-year-old daughter, her dark eyes bright. Then she rose on her tiptoes, one finger in her mouth, to peer over my leather clad shoulder. "Where's Mommy?"

"Mommy had things to do," I replied. Couldn't exactly tell my daughter that her mother was currently on a murder scene, now could I?

"Okie. Lemme go get Booka!"

I nodded and watched as she skipped off to go get her stuffed orange pony. The thing was starting to get ragged around the edges but she didn't care and dragged the thing around wherever she went.

She ran back a moment later with the pony dangling from one hand and I swept her up, making her giggle wildly as I spun around in a brief circle. Then I hugged her close against my chest and waited until her little arms wrapped around my neck with Booka hugged between her and me before I started moving out of her school. When we reached the outside, a cold wind made her shiver and I tugged my coat forward so she was covered by it.

"There you go, munchkin. Warm now?"

"Uh-huh," replied Elizabeth with a nod and I smiled before setting off down the sidewalk. My office was actually only a two-block walk from her school so I'd parked the Beetle in front of it and headed to pick her up. Hopefully my client for the day hadn't decided to arrive early.

There was no one waiting outside my door when we got there and I let Elizabeth down as I dug out my keys. As I got it open, there was the sound of heels on the stairs behind me and my daughter let out a little squeak. My coat was pushed aside and I felt her arm wrap around my leg where she hid underneath it.

When I turned towards the stairs, I saw a tall and buxom redhead standing there. She wore a crisp gray business suit (the kind with a skirt, not pants) with a white shirt underneath and dark heels. Cool gray eyes looked at me then glanced down at where Elizabeth peeked out at her from underneath my coat.

"Mister Dresden?" she queried, looking at me again.

"That'd be me," I replied. "And you are…"

"Meredith Evans."

Ah. My client.

"Let's go inside the, shall we?" I said as I pushed open the door with one hand and reached into my pocket with other. As Meredith passed me, I pulled out a bent nail and moved to brush it across her sleeve.

When she hissed and blurred away across the room, Elizabeth gasped and hugged at my leg harder. I reached down and patted her head where it rested against my thigh.

"Don't worry, munchkin," I assured her, glaring at the faerie. "She's not going to hurt you." Then I glared daggers at 'Meredith' and snarled, "What do you want? And what Court are you?"

"Summer," she snarled in reply as tiny patterns of green ivy began to spread across her face. "I came here in peace, Dresden."

"You came here in _disguise_ and _lied to me_. I don't take that as peace."

'Meredith' hissed as the patterns of ivy completed their pattern in a spiral that curved over each cheek. She held out her hands towards me, palm up, and said, "I am here as a messenger of the Queens of the Summer Court."

"Messengers of the Court don't need subterfuge," I growled. My hand touched my daughter's head again as I asked, "What's your unofficial reason?"

Gray eyes stared at me then flicked down to Elizabeth, who ducked back out of sight but not away from my hand in reaction. A-ha. Thought so, bitch.

My eyes narrowed and I snarled, "You and none of yours will _ever_ touch my daughter. And if you try it, I promise that I will kill every faerie that tries."

'Meredith's eyes widened at that.

"You would risk the wrath of the Summer Court over a _child?_ Dresden, I had heard you were a fool but not a sentimental one."

"_My child_. Now get your official business over and get out."

She stared at me for a moment then sniffed and nodded.

"Very well," she said in an icy tone. "The Lady bids you salutations and congratulations on your wedding and getting of a child. And she apologizes for her lateness in giving them and for not being present for either."

I nodded. So Lily had sent me a messenger…a messenger who had other goals as well. Hmm…and who in the Summer Court would be out to get me?

Possibly the Queen for me killing Aurora a while back. Although…could be a linking between the Courts again like was had with here and the Winter Knight. There were more name in Winter that hated me than there were in Summer; well, at least that _I_ knew of.

"You've given your message," I growled. "Now shoo."

'Meredith' bared her teeth at me and I smirked at the neat rows of pointed teeth. She sneered, "You would be so dismissive of a messenger?!"

"Nah, I'm not that crass. Now…people that come in and try to make with the nice while their plotting something extra? That I'm not too fond of. Oh, and nice teeth."

"You _will_ regret this, wizard."

"I have a lot of things I regret, faerie," I replied. "Take a number."

'Meredith' hissed again then, for a moment, flashed into her real form. I saw patterns of leaves and ivy just barely covering the essential parts then she vanished in a burst of white petals. As they fell to the floor and vanished as they went, I look down at Elizabeth.

"Munchkin?"

She sniffed and wriggled out from behind my coat with Booka hugged close and a finger in her mouth. I crouched down next to her then and pulled her close, rubbing a hand reassuringly over her back.

"Its okay, munchkin. She's gone now."

Elizabeth sniffed and flung her little arms around my chest as far as she could reach. "Daddy?"

"Yeah?"

"I don't like faeries anymore."

I smiled and looked down at her, brushing her hair with my gloved hand. When she looked up at me, I said softly, "Me either."


	5. Loss of Faith

**Title:** Loss of Faith  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for mild language and grief.  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse...sequel to _Faerie Fire, Life Anew, Secrets,_ and _My Defending Angel_.  
**Summary:** Harry and his daughter Elizabeth are close - as many a father and daughter are. But something is about to test that bond in the worst way possible.

* * *

Shit happens. 

That is a given in this mad world we live in.

Yeah, shit happens.

And it can happen to me all it wants.

But it does _not_ have permission as of yet to lay its grimy hands on my daughter and infect her as it has the rest of us. Not yet. _Not yet damnit._

Though, like I said…_shit happens._

Such as a Black Court vampire shooting my daughter with one of those damn darts as she and I were walking out of a movie theatre. Murph was working so we'd gone out on the town: y'know, dinner, movie, father/daughter jibbing. The usual thing we did when Murph had to work late if I wasn't working myself.

We were just walking with Elizabeth telling me about one of her male friends stupid stunts when it happened. I just barely heard the whistle of the dart flying then we both stared in shock as it blossomed from my daughter's arm.

Her dark eyes rolled back in her head and I caught her before she well, my eyes darted around me to see if I could find the culprit. I saw nothing and snarled angrily before picking her up fully, her thirteen-year-old body light in my arms. As I jogged towards the car, ignoring every query thrown at me, I felt her stir.

"Keep your eyes closed, Lizzy," I told her, praying she would listen. "Keep them closed."

I had seen myself underneath my own Sight years ago. And my daughter didn't need that to be the first thing she saw.

"My head…" she murmured, shifting. I glanced down a breathed a sigh of relief; her eyes were closed. "Daddy…"

"It'll be alright, Lizzy," I said as I kicked the passenger door of the Beetle near the bottom. It creaked and wobbled open in response and I placed her in the seat, buckling the seat belt over her. "Just…just keep your eyes closed, okay?"

"M'kay."

I nodded to no one in particular and ran to the driver's seat of the car, climbing in. It took me a moment to coax the engine to life then we were gone. I tried not to drive like a madman but with the chance of my daughter feeling rebellious and opening her eyes to see me…I couldn't help it.

Hells bells, why hadn't I gone ahead and taught her how to use it?! I should have; I _meant _to. But I didn't.

I didn't want my daughter to see me and have everything she knew torn asunder. Didn't want her to know that her father had done terrible things.

Most of all…I didn't want that image of me to be the first thing she saw. I did not want that to me the first thing that stayed with her for the rest of her life.

But…shit happens.

As I parked the Beetle and got out, she opened her eyes. And my heart broke when I opened the door and her dark eyes – so much like mine – were filled with fear.

"D-Daddy?"

"Lizzy," I breathed. "Stars and stones, why didn't you listen to me?"

Tears started then and I tried to reach out to wipe them away, to pull her out of the car and hold her. But she pulled away with a little whimper, the fear in her eyes not fading away.

I wanted to hunt down the vampire that had done this and make him pay. He would _bleed_ if I ever found him and more. _No one hurt my family._

"Lizzy, please," I said. "Get out of the car."

"Uh-uh," she breathed. "I-I can't."

"Damnit," I hissed, ducking my head. Then I heard the sound of a car pulling up and turned to see my brother climbing out of it, looking as pristine and pretty as usual.

"Hello, little brother!" he greeted cheerfully. Then he seemed to catch that the situation was bad and sobered as he walked towards me. "What's going on? Lizbeth? Why are you crying?"

"Black's, Thomas," I explained, taking a step away from the car and my daughter. I turned my back on her and my brother and snarled, "They _shot her_."

It took him a moment to comprehend what I was talking about. Then his hand touched my shoulder and he breathed, "Harry…"

I shrugged his hand off and moved further away.

"Take her inside, Thomas. Please."

"Okay."

I heard him move to the car and speak softly to Elizabeth, coaxing her out of the car and towards the apartment. Over the crunch of the gravel, I heard her sniffle and sob briefly. The sound made me want to turn and run to her, gathering her up in my arms and holding her close. To tell her everything was okay.

But…everything wasn't okay.

Damn Black Court.

Damn.

_Damn!_

I wanted to break something, to smash anything within reach into nothing but shards. But I held myself back. I stood, shaking in rage, in the gravel until my brother reappeared.

"She's in her room," he said. He moved to stand next to me but didn't touch me. My brother knew me well enough to know when I was angry – and that if he touched me, I was liable to take it out on him. "Jesus, Harry, I'm sorry."

"Don't be," I growled. "Wasn't your fault."

"And it wasn't yours either."

I shook my head at that and turned to look at him, snarling, "I _should_ have taught her. That was the one thing I've balked at. I didn't want to teach her how to open her Sight, not when she would see…" I trailed off, my voice breaking. Silently I fought the grief and rage down and breathed, "Not when she would see me."

"Harry…"

"Go back downstairs to her, Thomas. Please. She doesn't need to be alone right now."

"What about you?" asked my brother.

I sighed and scuffed my boots in the gravel.

"I need a beer."

He nodded and touched my arm gently, his touch almost not there. I turned to look at him and saw apology and pity in his eyes. And I almost punched him for it.

For that pity and the fact that when my daughter saw him, she saw no monster. Only her uncle, a paler version with strange strained eyes and with what looked like mist creeping around him. That's how my brother looked under the Sight.

Damn him.

Together we walked into my home and I went to the kitchen, dumping my coat on the counter. I felt Thomas' gaze on my back as I moved but ignored it. As I grabbed one of Mac's ales from the refrigerator, I heard his steps descend down into the basement. That had been the only place where we could put another room; so I'd gotten Michael's help and we had moved my lab to one side and put in a wall. And thus my daughter had a room of her own when she had turned ten and wanted that sort of thing.

As I walked over to the couch and sat down, Lasciel decided to make herself known.

_You are a fool, wizard_, she hissed.

_Tell me something I didn't already know, hellbitch. Now go away. I didn't ask for your stunning opinion on the matter._

_I am here to give it anyway._

_Don't want to hear it,_ I growled as I took a drink of the ale. _So shoo._

She sniffed but retreated from the forefront of my mind. As she did so, the front door shifted inwards and a tired, sweaty version of my wife staggered in. She looked ready to collapse but at the sight of me on the couch, she held herself up.

"Harry? What's wrong?"

"Remember years back?" I asked, setting the bottle of ale on the coffee table by the phone. I leaned forward and rested my elbows on my knees with my hands clasped at the back of my neck, head ducked towards the floor. "Black Court?"

"Yes."

"They didn't use all their precious darts, Murph," I hissed. "They shot another one at me tonight. Only I wasn't their target."

"_Elizabeth_."

"Yeah."

"She…" I could feel her eyes on me and my shoulders sagged. She knew what our daughter had seen. "Oh God, Harry."

I looked up at her and said, "Go down there. Please, Murph, go. She…hells bells, she needs something good to remember."

Blue eyes stared at me for a moment then she nodded and went. I dropped my head again and closed my eyes, just listening to her footsteps. More thumped up after she went down into the basement then a weight sank down next to me on the couch.

"Harry?" I heard my brother's voice query. "Are you…"

"If you dare ask me if I'm okay I'll slug you," I snarled, jerking my head up to glower at him. "I am _not_ okay."

Thomas flinched and rubbed his hands together nervously.

"Yeah," he said, "bad move on my part."

"Yeah." Then I groaned and asked, "Thomas, how is she?"

He winced and looked away from me, rubbing a hand nervously across his cheek. Slowly he began, "Confused. Hopelessly torn apart by what she saw. She's still trying to comprehend that what she saw was really you and not just some…" He trailed off and looked at me helplessly, obviously not wanting to finish that sentence.

I knew what he had been going to say.

I'd said it myself before.

"Monster," I said, watching as he winced.

"Harry…I'm sorry."

I nodded and ducked my head again, locking my hands against the back of my neck. As I closed my eyes, the grief swelled up and threatened to bowl me over. Tears pricked at the corners of my eyes no matter how I tried to stop them.

"Just…just go," I managed to breath out. I was breaking down and I didn't want him to see it.

But he didn't go.

Instead he laid a hand on my back. And I broke. That simple gesture undid everything and I choked there on the couch, shaking and swallowing down the screams of rage and sorrow I wanted to utter. But I couldn't stop the tears that came.

When it all got out and I was left choking on air, Murphy knelt in front of me. Thomas slowly rose and left, maybe actually gone or going back downstairs. As he went she wiped away the streaks of tears on my cheeks and I opened my eyes at the contact, looking up at her.

"Murph."

"She's sleeping now," she whispered, not locking her eyes with mine. Instead she remained focused on the remains of my unleashed grief. "I tried to explain what had happened but you know I'm no good at that."

She then sighed and said, "When I went in…she asked how."

"How what?" I queried though I thought I already knew the answer.

Murphy's voice was sad as she replied, "How an angel could marry a monster."

And people tell me I can't figure things out.

I knew that one.

It was a question I had asked myself several times after Murphy had accepted my proposal. I had stopped after a few years.

Now it came back to haunt me.

"What are we going to do?" I asked, feeling hopelessly lost. I didn't know what to do.

I didn't know how to fix what had happened.

I didn't know how to get my baby girl to trust me again.

Murphy shuddered and replied, "I don't know."

Not knowing what else to do, I drew her towards me gently. She scooted forward on her knees and wrapped her arms around me, her head resting against my chest. I slid my arms about her shoulders and stared across the room at where the door down into the basement had been lifted.

Shit happens, I know. Hell, I know that better than most.

Plans get fucked up.

People die.

Buildings crumble.

Wars destroy places.

All of those I can handle.

But my daughter, my baby, my Lizzy…her fear broke me.


	6. Soul Repair

**Title:** Soul Repair  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for mild language, crying, and mildly brooding Harry.  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse...sequel to _Loss of Faith, Faerie Fire, Life Anew, Secrets,_ and _My Defending Angel_.  
**Summary:** The bond between father and daughter is strong...but it can be broken. And Harry will do anything to repair the bond between him and Elizabeth.

* * *

When my old mentor showed up on my doorstep, I was surprised. Though I really shouldn't have been; he'd meet Elizabeth when she was seven years old. And just like everyone else, my baby girl had gotten him wrapped around her finger. 

When I opened the door and blinked at him, he peered worriedly back at me from where he leaned on his staff. Then he snorted and said, "You look like a wildcat got at you, hoss."

"A wildcat would be nice right about now," I muttered. Then I tugged the door opened and waved him on inside. "Guess you heard then."

"Heard what?" asked Ebenezar as he shrugged off his coat. He leaned his staff by the door next to mine, frowning briefly at the burns around the sigils. I just hoped he didn't ask about them; I wasn't in the mood to go over the fallen angel in my head.

"Remember when the Black Court got their hands on ThreeEye?" I asked as I trudged into the kitchen. Taking two of Mac's ales from the refrigerator, I walked back over to him as I finished, "Well, they didn't run out of their supply like we thought."

Ebenezar arched an eyebrow at that as he took the offered ale.

"I know you didn't get shot again, hoss. You wouldn't be this gloomy if you had." He then looked around and asked, "And where's that girl of yours? She's usua…"

His voice trailed off at that and I looked down at the floor as he realized what had happened.

"Hoss."

"Yeah?"

"They hit your girl."

"Yeah," I replied, my voice shaky. Running a hand back through my hair, I nodded towards the door that led down into the basement. "She hasn't come out since I ran back home with her after it happened. Not even for food or to go to school."

Ebenezar frowned at that and scratched at his chin. Then he said, "Lemme take a look at you, Hoss."

"No." I shook my head and looked up at him with a grim expression. "I've changed since the last time you looked at me with your Sight. I don't think you want to see what I've become."

"Hoss…"

"Just…just give me some advice? What can I do?"

He looked at me for a long moment then sighed.

"Have you tried talking to her?"

"How can I?" I growled in response, annoyed that he'd think I hadn't tried in the week since this horror film of my life had started. "I did try – once. But I couldn't do it because she cringed away from me and almost started crying."

My old mentor sighed at that.

"Hoss," he said seriously, "try talking to her through the door. If it's her sight of you causing the fear, talk to her without the sight."

I gaped like the village idiot at him in response to that. Why the hell hadn't I thought of that?!

"Okay," I said. "I'll give that a try."

"As will I," said Ebenezar, setting his now empty bottle on the kitchen counter. He clapped a hand on my shoulder and breathed, "Things'll turn out all right, Hoss. She's your daughter…things may be broken between you know but they can be repaired."

I just nodded at that, unable to find words to say. He smiled at me and squeezed my shoulder before he went over to the door, lifting it up and heading down. I heard Mouse bark a greeting and then the door closed and I couldn't hear anything.

Sighing, I poured out what was left of the ale – sacrilege, I know, but I didn't care at the moment – and tossed the bottles in the trash. Walking over to the couch, I slumped down onto it, lying down and staring at the ceiling as the light from the fireplace and candles danced across it.

As I lay there, I went over in my head what I might say to my daughter. The moment Ebenezar left, I was going to try and make things right. Murphy was working late on a case, Thomas was off in another state for a week with whatever he did, and Molly was off on a Spring Break vacation somewhere.

I had time.

I had to make things right.

Sighing, I closed my eyes and when I opened them again Ebenezar was leaning over me and it was dark outside. Huh, I fell asleep. Shocking since I hadn't gotten more than six hours sleep in the past week.

"I talked to her a bit, Hoss," he said as I slowly sat up, stretching and rotating my neck. "She told me she saw a monster."

I winced rather violently at that and leaned back against the couch.

"Yeah…"

"And I think that's more that creature in your head than anything else."

It took me a second to process what he had just said. When I did, I sprang to my feet with a strangled snarl of, "Does _everyone_ know about the damned thing now?!"

He smiled gently at me and replied, "The Hellfire sort of gives it away, Hoss."

"Son of a _bitch_."

"Language, boy."

"_Shit._"

Ebenezar sighed and said, "The Knight told me about it. No one else knows."

"Hells bells," I breathed. "That's a blessing. I don't need more shit piled on top of that I already have with her royal pain in the ass."

Somewhere in the back of my head something sniffed imperiously and I snarled, _Shut. Up._

He nodded then explained, "I think it's _her_ presence that's caused all this trouble."

"Maybe," I assented. Nervously I ran a hand back through my hair and added, "But…I've done a lot of things I'm not proud of, before and after she ended up in my head."

"Yet you did them anyway."

"Because it was the right thing to do, usually. Sometimes the _only_ thing to do."

"Like shooting the Corpsetaker."

I shuddered at the memory of that event, when I had shot a woman not knowing if she was really the body jumping fiend or not. The chance had been there that she wasn't…and I wasn't going to risk the sliver of hope that it hadn't happened. So I shot her. I had been right.

But it still sort of frightened me that, if it was what was needed, I could so coldly kill someone.

"Yeah," I said slowly. "Like that."

Ebenezar sighed and gripped my shoulder, squeezing gently. He looked straight at me, right into the eyes, and said, "You're a good man, Hoss. Wrong decisions you've made, yes, but you did you best to fix them. And you've always tried to do right. That makes up for everything."

"Thanks."

"And this 'monster' of yours?"

I stiffened at that. "Yeah?"

He smiled and said, "Everyone has a monster in them, Hoss. It's a matter of if you let it control you."

I just nodded at that and watched as he gathered up his coat and staff, getting ready to leave. Following him to the door, I said, "Thanks."

"S'no problem, Hoss. Now you fix this thing, alright?"

"Yes, sir."

He smiled and nodded at me then slipped out the door to start up the steps to the street. I watched him go for a moment and waited until I heard the coughing rattle of his old pick-up before I close the door.

Leaning against it, I closed my eyes and sighed.

_He is a fool just like you._

_Lasciel_, I snarled, _I am not in the mood right now._

The fallen angel sniffed and said, _You work so hard on the bonds between you and others and look…look how easily they shatter at the slightest thing._

_Slightest thing?! My daughter saw her father as a monster; I'd say her reaction was justified!_ I scowled and added, _And I bet he's right. You're the reason for this._

_Not the only one, my dear host. You have slipped into the dark and twisted your soul more than once on your own._

_I know what I've done_, I snarled. _Now go the fuck away. I have shit to do and none of it involves you._

_Very well_, she said. As her presence faded away, I pushed myself away from the door and walked slowly towards the sub-basement door. Tugging one of the rugs close, I sat down on it next to the door then rapped my knuckles lightly against it.

"Lizzy?"

There was a brief, strangled scream in response then I heard, "Y-yes?"

"I'm not coming down there, baby," I said, heart breaking at the fear in her voice. "Just…just come and sit on the ladder by the door. It'll be okay to talk through that, right?"

I waited for a moment then breathed a sigh of relief when I heard the creak of the ladder.

"Okay," she said through the door.

I frowned and looked for the words I'd had earlier…but they had all flown the proverbial coop. Chickens.

Sighing, I asked, "Your mom tried to explain what that was, didn't she?"

There was silence in response then Elizabeth said softly, "She said it was Wizard's Sight."

"Yeah. Every wizard and witch can use it…it shows us the truth of things. Sometimes it's a beautiful one, like your mother. And sometimes it's not."

I sighed and closed my eyes as I continued.

"I've done some bad things in my life, Lizzy. And I know no child wants to know that their parents are capable of things like that but…" I trailed off for a moment, looking for words. "But that truth you saw, the one that dart forced you to see…that was because of those bad things, baby."

"And just because something may look horrible, doesn't mean it is. Most times it does but not here, not now. I usually don't think it but your mother and so many others know I'm a good man. Sometimes I lose sight of that and just focus on the bad." I chuckled without humor as I added, "It's a horrible fault I hope you didn't inherit."

"Me too," said Elizabeth. Then she paused and I could just see her sitting there on the ladder, nervously biting her lip like she always did. "Daddy?"

"Yes, munchkin?"

"What do I do? I don't want to be afraid of you…"

I heard the tears in her voice and it felt like something with claws mauled my heart. Stars and stones, I'd made my baby cry again.

"I can't help you with that, munchkin," I said. "I can't help you fix your own fear. All I can do…all I can do is hope you can get over it."

Slowly I reached out and laid my hand on top of the door, closing my eyes in pain.

"I'm here, Lizzy. And I'm still your father."

"God, Daddy… I'm so sorry."

"I know, baby. I know."

She sobbed on the other side of the door and I couldn't help it. I opened it slowly so as not to frighten her, carefully reaching in to touch her back with my hand. She stiffened at the touch but didn't turn to look at me.

"Daddy…"

"Shh," I murmured, leaning forward. I carefully pulled her up to me and sat on the floor with her in my lap, just as I used to when she was younger. Wrapping my arms around her, I drew her back against my chest and said, "Just keep your eyes closed, baby. I'll keep you safe."

She sniffed then choked out, "Fr-from the m-monsters?"

"Every one," I replied.

Elizabeth burst out into more tears then and I just held her as she cried, unable to do any more than that.

She still couldn't look at me. And she still cried when I was nearby.

But _damnit_ we had a start.

I had one foot in the door that led to getting my baby girl back. And God help the one that tried to get me to close it because I was going to fight tooth and nail against it.

Nothing was going to keep me from my girl.

_Nothing._


	7. Life Refreshed

**Title:** Life Refreshed  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for sappiness.  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse...sequel to _Soul Repair, Loss of Faith, Faerie Fire, Life Anew, Secrets,_ and _My Defending Angel_.  
**Summary:** The world turns and the circle repeats. Things are repaired that were broken. Such as with Harry's life and his family.

* * *

Its been a year now since my world was nearly torn apart. And it its still not entirely repaired. 

Things are better though.

My daughter, now fourteen, can look at me now without crying. I no longer see fear in her eyes either. But the bond we used to have…its still broken.

We keep working on it. Pieces of it keep coming back.

But it's still not all there.

And that's okay.

I know we'll get it back someday.

Maybe right now, while we sit in the Beetle sweltering, we can fix it a little.

Elizabeth sighed, leaning back against her seat, and asked, "Couldn't we have stayed at home?"

"I sat our here while you were being born," I replied, my eyes closed as I reclined my head back. "Figured I should give the next one the same courtesy."

"Why can't we go wait inside? I want to see Mom later."

I opened one eye to look at her at that.

"I took out a lamp the last time. If I went in now I'd definitely take out the first floor."

"Nervous?"

"For grown up reasons," I explained. "Wondering if we have the money to support all of us. How we'll give you both a room. Trying to figure out how not to mess up again."

My daughter sat up and looked at me then with her dark eyes. Eyes as dark as mine. As she seemed to be gathering words, I studied her.

She was already starting to develop into the woman she would be. With my coloring over her mother's build alongside the addition of long, coltish legs, she would likely have boys running after her in not too long a time. Ah, I would have a fun time threatening them.

My hawkish nose was the only thing I regretted her inheriting but, eh, them's genetics.

"Dad…you didn't mess up."

"No, I did," I said, closing my eye again. "If your sibling is gifted, I won't wait out of fear to teach them about the Sight. I won't make that mistake again."

Elizabeth nodded then smiled briefly, saying, "Just remember to show him Mom first."

"Of course. And 'him'?"

"I've always sort of wanted a little brother."

I chuckled at that and said, "Maybe you'll get your wish."

"Maybe," she echoed. Though her smile faded a little then and I just so happened to open my eyes to see it.

"What's bothering you?"

She blinked then blushed, looking down at the floorboard.

"Nothing."

"Lizzy…what's wrong? C'mon, baby, talk to me."

She bit her lip as she flicked a bug off of one of her skinny knees. Then she sighed and said, "I guess I'm being stingy. But…I just don't want to stop being the baby."

I sighed at that and said, "Come here, girl," reached out an arm to her. She leaned forward and I pulled her close, hugging her tightly before ruffling her short shorn hair. Ah, what happened to my little girl with her hair in a braid who swore she'd always have one?

She giggled and shifted so she leaned against me with my arm wrapped comfortably around her.

"You'll always be my baby girl," I assured her, ducking my head to rest my chin on top of hers. "Don't worry about that ever changing. Because even when you're my age you'll still be that…though you might find it embarrassing for me to call you that by then.""

Elizabeth tilted her head back to smile at me, saying, "Never, Daddy."

Now that I didn't believe but her words warmed my heart…and I felt a shattered piece of it repair itself, the cracks smoothing away. Piece by piece, our bond was coming back together.

Stars and stones, what a blessing to have my girl.

We sat there in comfortable silence for a moment then were interrupted when my brother threw himself onto the hood of the car. He waved goofily at Elizabeth, who giggled at her uncle, then grinned at me.

"Hiya, little brother."

"Hi," I said, frowning at him. "Now spill. You've been inside all this time. Heard anything about Murph?"

"Safe and sound with your little baby boy in her arms," replied Thomas. "Congrats, Harry. You have another rascal."

"Thanks. I think."

"Can I go see Mom?" asked Elizabeth, her eyes bright. When there was a spark from her pocket and she reached in to pull out her old-model cell phone, she sighed. "Nevermind. Dad…I fried the phone again."

"Hence why I said cells were a bad idea all-over," I said. Then I climbed out of the car and stretched before looking at my brother. "You mind climbing off my car?"

"Sure," replied Thomas, sliding off of the front compartment. "Though, y'know, it won't hurt it. With how much you put this car through, I expect it to be immortal by now."

I grinned at that and said, "Shh. That's our secret weapon."

Elizabeth, who had opened her own door and was standing in it leaning on the hood, laughed at us. Then she cocked her head at me and asked, "Dad, when can we get Mom? And what're we going to call my little brother?"

I shrugged and replied, "Probably tomorrow is when we can pick your mom up. That's how it was when you were born. As to your brother, we actually discussed that beforehand instead of waiting until after like we did with you."

"Sooooo?"

"Its Nicolas. Nicolas Eric."

She frowned for a moment then smiled and nodded. "I like it."

I chuckled at that, saying, "Glad we have your approval, munchkin. Now get in the car. Thomas, you get to ride in the back."

"Yay, I get to ride where the dog rides. Thanks, Harry. You're a wonderful brother."

Elizabeth chortled whilst I glared at my brother in the rearview mirror before backing out of the parking lot. As we drove off I growled, "Smart aleck."

He just grinned back at me before launching into a conversation with his niece. I listened to them as I drove, flicking a glance every few moments at my grinning daughter.

The light that had been missing in her for a year was back.

Hells bells, how I'd missed it.

Upon our arrival back at the apartment, I set Elizabeth to cleaning the place up a bit and glowered my brother into helping her. Whilst they did that, I went into the bedroom and dug into the back of the closet for the old baby things I'd put into storage back there. The bed was easy enough to put back together and I hauled it back to its place at the end of the bed. As I was straightening it up and brushing the dust off of it, Elizabeth wandered in. She stood in a door watching me until I realized that she was there.

When I noticed the small, serene smile on her face, I blinked.

"What's up?"

"Nothing," she replied, shaking her head. Then she abruptly moved to hug me. "Just wanted to say I love you."

"Love you too, munchkin," I returned warmly, hugging her back.

"You're a great dad. You know that, right?"

"Well…I was doubting it there for a while but if the most beautiful little girl in the world tells me so then it must be true."

She laughed at that then said, "Seriously, Dad. You are."

I smiled at that. "I know."

Then she jabbed in the ribs with a finger and snipped, "But I'm not a little girl anymore."

"Oh really?"

"Yeah really."

A wicked grin spread across my face and she realized what I was about to do. She tried to pull back but I grabbed her under the arms and flung her onto the bed…where I proceeded to tickle my daughter to death. The screaming and laughter brought my brother to the door and he stood there laughing at us.

After a while we finally managed to complete the cleaning and Thomas left, promising to be by tomorrow in the afternoon. We waved to him from the steps then went out walking Mouse together, Elizabeth taking the big dogs leash and racing him along the sidewalk in front of me. I got a good laugh out of the pair of them and wished the next day would come sooner.

I wanted my wife and son home.

The night ambled on without any problems and then the next day I got in the Beetle and headed to the hospital to pick up Murphy. This time the nurses didn't dare try to offer her a wheelchair on the way out, which made me wonder again what she had done to those poor people. But the thought faded when she met me with a smile and our baby boy in her arms.

"We have to stop having accidents like this," she said though there was no bite in her voice.

I chuckled and slid my arms around her shoulders, saying, "Aw…but I like how these accidents come about." Then I reached over and touched Nicolas' cheek gently, saying, "They're beautiful accidents, Murph."

"Our beautiful accidents," she confirmed. I looked down at her and again found her more lovely in this rumpled state that any time else.

As I steered her towards the Beetle, I kissed the top of her head and murmured, "Love you."

"Love you too, you big lug. Now take me home."

I grinned and slid away from her, affecting a hunch and a limp as I opened the car door. "Yesss, mistress. Whatever mistress wishes I shall get."

She laughed at me and I climbed into the car, feeling better than ever. And that feeling only increased when we got back to our home and Elizabeth ran up, immediately cooing over her little brother.

They stood there in the middle of the room, the light from the fire playing across their back, and I watched them from the door.

My wife, blonde hair rumpled and tired but still as beautiful as ever.

My daughter, precious beyond belief to me and one of the best things I had ever had in my life besides Murph.

My son, new to this world and already close to my heart.

I wanted a camera to capture this moment, to have a picture of them to hold close to my heart. But I had none.

Instead I opened my Sight for a brief moment to view them and nearly wept.

My battle-scarred angel stood there, her sword sheathed as she held our son, who had not lived long enough to have a definition under the Sight other than himself. And beside her was another angel, dark of hair with no sword at her side, touched briefly with the dark from her brush with Three Eye but unmarred beyond that.

What had I done to deserve such a woman?

And what I done to receive such a daughter? Such a son?

I let the Sight fade away and met Murph's eyes, seeing the answer to my question in that blue gaze I loved.

I had done nothing to deserve it.

It had been given to me without regret.

Stepping forward, I bent my head to kiss my wife and ruffled my daughter's dark hair. Then I looked down at our son and smiled.

Everything was right again.


	8. Web Weaving

**Title:** Web Weaving  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for chaos.  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse...sequel to _Life Refreshed, Soul Repair, Loss of Faith, Faerie Fire, Life Anew, Secrets,_ and _My Defending Angel_.  
**Summary:** There are things that happen that make you wear yourself out. And others that make you send yourself careening over the edge. The events here are of the latter...and Harry is careening over that edge willingly into the dark.

* * *

"Horsey!" 

I heard my daughter laugh through the wall that separated her room from the lab. "Aren't you getting too big to ride Mouse, Nicky?" she asked, her voice amused.

"Nuh-uh," replied my five-year-old son with the fervor every child has at that age. "Please let me?"

I would just see him standing there with his little face wrenched into a pout, dark eyes all puppy-like with his locks of dusky blonde hair falling all over his face. Then there was my Elizabeth, all leanness and long limbs toned by her mother teach her aikido, sitting on her bed with an amused smile, her dark hair tucked into a braid that hung over one shoulder.

My kids. What joys they were.

"Grown into quite the catch she has," said a lusty voice from across the room then. I glanced towards the skull on the shelf then at the door, which was slightly cracked open to allow you to see into the next room.

"Bob," I growled, glowering at the skull. The orange lights in the eye sockets bobbed towards me and flickered down to tiny pinpricks.

"I'll just shut up now."

I nodded at him, growling, "Good idea."

So sue me. I can barely stand boys hitting on my baby girl; what makes someone thing I'm going to take that from my lecherous air spirit?

I nodded at Little Chicago and added, "Now get back to searching. That ghoul has to have left something somewhere."

"I've told you, Harry, I can't find anything," said the skull.

"_Bob_."

"Fine, fine, mister bossy boss."

Fine orange mist flowed out of the skull and began swirling over the mockery of Chicago as the door between lab and bedroom opened fully. My daughter stuck her head in as my son came careening in, rushing straight up to me where I sat on a stool. He bounced up and down joyfully and I reached out to place a hand on his face to stop him.

"Down, grasshopper."

Nick grinned at me from under my hand then asked, "Can I ride Mouse?"

I smiled and replied, "I think you're a bit big now to be riding Mouse." Sure the dog was huge but my son was already starting to show signs that he'd inherited my height in spades. He was all long, gangly limbs and was a good head and a half taller than his classmates. Even our dogasaurus would be hard pressed to carry him around like he had done since the boy was two.

Don't ask how that one came about. It was all Nick and Mouse though Murph swears I'm the one that started it. I claim innocence and blackmail.

"Aw…"

Elizabeth chuckled and said, "How about we just take him for a walk instead, Nicky? I'll even let you hold the leash."

"Can I?" he asked, eyes lighting up again as he looked up at me.

Stars and stones. How could I resist giving in to that light in his eyes?

"All right."

"Yay!"

I ruffled his hair and added with a raised finger, "But…no running away from your sister, okay?"

Nick nodded and I smiled, knowing I hadn't really had to say that. He adored Elizabeth as much as she did him.

"Okay then. Lizzy, watch him."

"Of course, Dad," she said, walking into the room. She strode over and kissed me briefly on the cheek before bending to pick up her little brother. He giggled as she tickled his stomach and added, "We'll be fine."

I nodded and watched them as they left, smiling as I heard Nick start happily chattering about how he was going to be great in holding Mouse's leash. Ah, five-year-old's. Proud of everything they do.

Turning back to the table, I cocked my head at Bob and asked, "Find anything?"

The mist rotated another turn then stopped, as he replied, "Nothing, Harry."

I frowned and picked up my pen again, absently tapping the end of it on the pad I'd been scrawling notes on. Murphy had come up against a case with a ghoul as the murderer and I was working on nothing much more than the places where it had struck. And one of the crime photos, which was hidden under my pad.

That was the sort of thing I didn't want my children to see.

"Damnit," I cursed as I heard footsteps on the sub basement stairs. "Search again, Bob. We've got to find this thing."

The orange mist flickered for a moment.

"I'm doing the best I can, Harry."

"We know," said Murphy in a tired voice as she appeared in the doorway. "But keep trying?"

Bob was silent for a moment then said, "All right." As he started looking again, I rose and moved to pull Murphy close. She sighed and leaned against me, wrapping her arms very loosely about my waist. I ran my fingers gently through her hair then, a bit disturbed when I came across strands of graying hair amongst the blonde.

It made my thoughts drift towards things I had rather not think of. Losing her forever being the utmost of them.

"We'll find that thing, Murph," I murmured. "Don't worry."

"I'm not. Where'd the kids go?"

"Out walking Mouse."

"Oh."

I looked down at her and gave her a little shake, making her jolt back upright and blink at me. Sighing, I said, "Aw, Murph. You shouldn't work yourself to the bone like this."

Her gaze hardened and she hissed, "This thing is in _my_ city killing _my_ people."

"I know. But if you kill yourself chasing it, whose going to kill it?"

She blinked at me then sighed, shoulders slumping. I smiled and asked, "See my point?"

"Yes," she replied. Then she glowered up at me weakly and growled, "But I don't have to like it."

"Never said you did," I said, running my fingers through her hair again. Then I turned her around and started leading her out of the lab. "Now back upstairs with you and to bed."

Murphy glared at me as she started back up the stairs. "I am _not_ an old maid, Harry."

"Of course not." I leaned back slightly and appraised the view I had from where I stood with a leer. "No old maid could have an ass quite like that."

"Perv."

"Its not perverted to talk like that about my own wife," I said as I followed her up out of the sub basement. Pulling her close, I bent my head and kissed her before she could vanish into our bedroom. "Sweet dreams, Murph."

She smiled at me then and nodded before going into the room and closing the door. I stood there staring at it for a moment before I went to grab a Coke from the refrigerator before heading back downstairs to see how Bob was doing in his search.

An hour later with still nothing, I was dragged back out of the basement by banging on the front door. When I opened it, I saw someone on the other side that surprised me.

"Morgan? What the hell are _you_ doing here?!" When he just kept giving me that grim look of his and didn't snap back at me, I knew something was wrong. "What's happened?"

He just stared at me then reached under his gray cloak, drawing out a rolled up piece of parchment and extending it to me. I took in gingerly, noticing that there was a spatter of red along one edge. Blood?

"What's this?" I asked, a feeling of dread coming over me. Why was Morgan here?

What time was it?

Hells bells, where were my kids?

"Read it," replied Morgan.

I blinked at him then unrolled the letter, finding an elegant scrawl staring back at me from the expensive looking paper.

"_Wizard, it has been a long while. And I suddenly realize that I have not meted my revenge on you for so spoiling my plans years ago. I will remedy that mistake now._

_Come. Alone. I will meet you where I put my plans into action years ago – you should recall where._

_Bring a Knight or any other and I will kill your son. Come not at all…and I will kill them both._

_Nicodemus_"

Shock.

That was the first thing that set in.

When Morgan, an expression on his face that might have been pity, reached into his cloak again, he drew out a bracelet. I took it numbly when he held it out and stared at it.

It had been my present to Elizabeth on her eighteenth birthday. Nothing more than silver links wound with white thread to the normal person but anyone else would have seen it for what it was. I had asked a favor from Lily, the Summer Lady – asked her to give me something that I could give my daughter, to protect her. It had been this, these silver, faerie made links bound together with a thin rope made from the hair of a unicorn.

It had been supposed to _protect_ her.

Shock had been the first thing I felt.

Rage was the next.

Morgan looked at me closely and said, "Do not do something rash, Dresden."

"Rash?" I hissed, my voice cold. "I'm not going to do anything _rash_, Morgan. I am going to kill him."

"That _is_ rash."

I snarled and lunged at him then, grabbing him by the front of his cloak. His eyes widened in reaction and I might have laughed at the thought of his being scared of me if the situation wasn't what it was.

"He has my _children_. And nothing you or anyone else does will keep me from getting them back!"

"Dresden…"

I growled and shoved him backwards hard enough to make him trip and fall onto the stairs.

"Don't test me, Morgan," I hissed. "And don't get in my way."

As I turned and started to head back inside, he called, "What are you going to do, Dresden? You barely managed against him the last time!"

I stopped in the doorway and ducked my head, closing my eyes. Then I opened them again and hissed, "I will go to hell and back, Morgan. Damn the consequences and what happens to me…I will have my children _safe_ and out of that monster's hands."

Then I slammed the door in his face.

I stood there for a moment, the rage I felt making it almost unbearable to move. My fists clenched so hard my nails dug into my palms and my teeth creaked from them being ground together.

I was angry beyond belief.

And I wanted to burn anything that got in my way to the ground.

_You are certain?_ Said the voice in my head as I started moving again.

_Yes._

_To get them back you will give up everything?_

_Not everything_, I replied as I went back down into the sub basement. Bob had tired out and was resting in his skull, unable to do much of anything.

Good. Maybe he wouldn't hear.

Walking to the far side of the lab, I knelt down on the floor and picked up a stray piece of chalk. I sketched a circle over a spot then touched my fingers to it, lending it the power it needed to come to life. The chalk glowed under my fingertips and I smiled.

Then I snarled and shoved a large burst of power and anger into the circle, causing the area within it to explode in the sudden rush of energy.

"Wha?" I heard behind me as I reached down into the hole in the floor. "Harry?"

"S'alright, Bob," I said, picking up the dingy napkin from the hole. I unwrapped it and stared down at the coin within it, which was still as silver as it had been when I placed it there. "Go back to sleep."

"Harry?" he queried again. "Harry, what's going on?"

"Nothing," I hissed softly as I picked up the coin with my gloved hand. My hand that had touched it originally, that had been burnt years ago and had recovered its motions. With Lasciel's sigil still standing out sharply within the burned flesh.

As I closed my fingers around the coin, I whispered, "And everything."

_You are ready to make a deal, my host?_

_No deal_, I snarled. _You help me. Or I die and you lose everything._

Silence answered me for a moment then the coin pulsed in my hand, hot and cold all at once.

_Done._

I tensed then opened my mind and let her in: Lasciel, the Temptress, the Webweaver. My curse for years.

Temptation.

I gave in and let her presence in my head, let her power mix with mine. Like she wanted for so long.

For Lizzy.

For Nick.

I damned myself.

And if I made it through this and had to make the choice again…I would.


	9. Tread Lightly

**Title:** Tread Lightly  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for chaos, death scenes, and language.  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse...sequel to _Web Weaving, Life Refreshed, Soul Repair, Loss of Faith, Faerie Fire, Life Anew, Secrets,_ and _My Defending Angel_.  
**Summary:** The worst thing one can do is threaten a man's family when he has a way to defend himself. Threatening Harry's family is really one of the stupidest things one can do. Because he will go to any means to make sure you hurt for it.

* * *

_This is…interesting._

I growled and skidded to a halt at the edge of the room, sniffing at the air. Just like with all of the rest of the Denarians, taking the coin gave me an alternate form.

That it was wolfish didn't surprise me at all.

_Shut up_, I snarled. Clawing at the ground, I caught the scent again and leapt to the roof of the next building with a howl full of rage.

Lasciel kept her promise. When I let her in my head, she just sniffed and asked me what next. I told her what I was planning.

Heheh, she'd called me crazy.

Guess I am for taking her help.

I left Murph a note before I took off; told her what had happened. That I was going after the kids.

If she woke up, she'd come after me, I knew. But if I had done something to keep her there…she would have hated me.

I couldn't stand that.

Morgan was gone when I got outside, which was good. The moment I was there, Lasciel smirked and had said, _Now, dear wizard, let me show you just what we can do together._

That was how I'd ended up like this, in this form. It was wolfish, sure, but bigger by far than those from the incident with the wolf belts. About the size of Murph's car really…so, yeah…_big_. Thick, black fur covered me from head to tail in this form – yes, tail – and razor sharp claws sprang from tire-sized paws to rend whatever it touched. A glance at a puddle of water outside showed my eyes to be dark with points of red glowing deep within them, fires in the dark.

And in the center of my forehead, underneath a hank of dark fur, glowed Lasciel's sigil in dark red.

Woohoo, I'm a demon.

Just what I _always _wanted.

As the roofs of the buildings gave way to the suburbs, I leapt to the ground and kept running, claws tearing up pavement behind me. My apologies to the people that would have to fix those.

_So you are actually planning to kill him._

_That's the plan._

_You truly think you can?_ She asked. Was that curiosity and hope I heard?

I smiled in the only way a wolf can, with a flash of gleaming ivory fangs.

_I intend to._

She was silent for a moment then said, _You are still a fool._

_More of one for letting you in_, I snarled back at her. _But I am getting my kids back and I am **killing** that bastard for daring to touch them. And you're going to help me._

Lasciel seemed to smile at that.

_Killing him I cannot disagree with. Though do you truly expect me to let you go when this is over? Do you expect **you** will be able to let go of my power?_

I growled out loud and mentally at that.

_Don't threaten me, hellbitch. My family is more important to me than any offer you can make or anything you can tempt me with. They will **always** win._

_So be it, wizard_, she hissed. _So I am only your…what is the phrase?_

_Ace in the hole._

_Yes._

_Yeah_, I replied as I skidded to a stop at the edge of the airport. Crouching, I leapt over the fence that surrounded it in a surge of muscles and came down running on the other side. _That would be you._

There was a mutter from her that I couldn't hear then, _You are a stubborn fool. And he was a fool to think you would fall so easily._

_Maybe back then_, I growled as I raced towards the building, dodging past the various cars in the parking lot. _Not now._

Getting in the building proved to be an easy matter. The doors were open. And everything was empty.

Frighteningly empty.

Growling, I paced into the building then closed my eyes and concentrated. When I opened them a moment later and started walking, I was back to looking normal. Only now I was walking with Lasciel's coin tucked inside my glove.

_He's here._

Now that wasn't hard to tell. When Nicodemus was around, you knew it. I hadn't sensed it the last time I'd met him but this time I did – guess it was the influence from my own little Fallen friend.

The whole place smelt of rot and decay. And all of it was coming from the chapel.

The chapel.

Where a Knight of the Cross had given up his life for me.

It was a trap and I knew it.

I walked into it anyway.

Y'know…just like I usually do.

The first thing I saw were my children, lying on the floor next to the altar with their arms handcuffed and gags in their mouths. My heart leapt in my throat and, after glancing around nervously, I rushed towards them.

"Lizzy. Nick. Wake up!"

My son opened his eyes first, blinking blearily at me. Then he recognized me and tried to struggle upright. I pulled him to his feet immediately and removed the gag – I couldn't do anything about the handcuffs.

"Are you okay?" I asked, hugging him briefly. "Did he hurt you?"

"I did nothing to them, wizard," said a voice from the back of the room. Lasciel hissed in my head and I rose with a dark snarl to glare at Nicodemus as he stepped out of the shadows.

"_You._"

He just smiled and said, "Indeed. Come, wizard. I know you picked up her coin…that is what I was hoping for."

"What do you want?" I hissed. Keeping my eyes on him, I bent and pulled my waking daughter to her feet.

"Nothing. Everything."

My own words to Bob thrown back at me.

Stupid coincidence.

"Dad?" queried Elizabeth, looking towards me woozily as I held her up. "What's going on?"

"Take your brother and get out of here, Lizzy," I said, not taking my eyes off Nicodemus. I couldn't afford to with them here – there was no telling what he would do. "Just run."

She blinked at me then breathed, "Daddy…"

"Baby, go. Please."

For a moment she just stared at me then nodded, moving slowly out of the chapel with her brother at her side. Nicodemus sniffed in response and said, "Fatherhood. Just a proud state, isn't it?"

I stiffened and hissed, "What do you know about fatherhood? All you have is a crazy, homicidal maniac for a daughter who looks like she escaped from a mad scientists lab."

"Deirdre is gone."

"Sorry. Can't really bring myself to give a shit."

He smiled grimly at that and stared at me.

"The last coins…are here."

I stiffened at that then snarled, "What?"

"The last coins, wizard. Yours and mine – they are all the Knights need to have our kind locked up forever."

"I am _not_ your kind."

"Oh?"

"Yeah," I growled.

_You still going to help me?_

_To kill him I would help the worst fool in the world._

_Y'know, a simple 'yes' would do._

"You're a fool, wizard," sneered Nicodemus. "What are you then? You finally took up the coin and now you are not the same as I? Making a deal with the devil, boy, is the same to everyone that does it."

"What's different is the reason _why_."

He sniffed at that.

"Oh, yes. Saving your precious little spawn. You are a fool." Then he smiled and said, "I will break you, wizard. Then I will hunt them down and kill them. And then I will rip that coin from you…and give it to your wife."

My heart froze, seeming to stop beating for a moment.

Then it started racing.

Then the rage hit.

Snarling animally, I rushed at him before I really knew what I was doing. His shadow slapped me away easily and as I hit the wall then thumped to the floor, I heard him laughing and Lasciel screaming at me.

_You are truly a fool! We would have a better chance at this if I…_

_Don't,_ I hissed. Slowly I started moving, shaking my head as I rose to my hands and knees. The rage had been thrown back just like I had…and now I could use it.

"Well, wizard, it seems like this will be a shorter battle than I thought. You still know nothing of…"

His voice froze when I looked up at him with the wolf's eyes.

A feral grin twisted my lips and I hissed, "Know nothing of what now?" Laughing, I got up and dusted imaginary dirt off my knees, then looked at him again. "You blinded me for a second. It won't happen again."

"And why is that?" he asked.

"Because I'm going to kill you no matter what you say."

He sneered then hissed as I lunged forward, faster this time. His shadow darted towards me but I dodged it and tried to grasp at the end of the noose around his neck. It slipped out of my hand as he threw himself backwards and I snarled angrily.

"Afraid of me killing you this time?" I hissed as he tucked the end of the noose into his shirt.

"Not at all, wizard," he replied. "Just protecting my interests."

Uh-huh. Right. I believe that, sure.

Stupid to wear it brazenly anyway.

"Protecting it? What will tucking it into your shirt do?"

I smiled and added, "I'm going to rip it off your neck, after all." Then I thrust my right hand forward, fingers curled into claws, and snarled, "_Fuego!_"

Yeah, my control without my blasting rod or staff is still shit. But I'm not going for finesse.

Messy works just as well right now.

Instead of having a fireball rush from my hand, fire lashed up in response. It licked up from the bottom of the walls and Nicodemus gave it a glance before smirking at me.

"Boxing us both in? And here I thought you were planning on escaping later."

"Little incentive for you not to run."

"And why would I run, wizard?"

I closed my eyes at that and everything twisted. When I looked back at him, I grinned the wolf's smile and watched him gap in surprise. I took the opening that gave for all it was worth.

Muscles bunching, I leapt across the room at him with a howl. He threw his shadow in my way as he dived aside and it tore ruthlessly at my paws and face, ripping deep rends into them. As he withdrew it, I spun and grinned at him through the blood as Lasciel threw her power into things and healed the wounds.

_Kill him!_

Snarling, I rushed forward again, snapping at him with my jaws as he just barely dodged again. His shadow tore into my shoulder but I kept going, following Nicodemus wherever he went. The flames limited where we could move in the room. My bulk limited it even more.

Eventually I was going to catch him.

Even with his shadow helping him.

He did manage to keep up the dodging game for a little while.

But he _did_ slip.

He threw his shadow at me, aiming it at where I was crouched on the ground. I leapt over it and it came after me, arching at my back. But I caught up to Nicodemus and clamped my jaws about his right arm.

You know wolf's can snap the leg of a moose like its nothing?

Multiply that by about seven in my case.

Fuck his precious noose.

You can't withstand something like that.

So I ripped his arm off.

Nicodemus didn't bleed from the wound but he did look surprised. I dropped the arm to the ground and bared bloody fangs at him in response.

Then I lunged forward again, another snarl bubbling out of my throat. His shadow hit me in the chest this time, trying to drive its way in to my heart. Growling, I pulled away from it, blood gushing from my chest until Lasciel healed it.

"You can't keep this up forever," snarled Nicodemus, one hand clamped over where his other arm used to be. "You will _fail_, wizard!"

I smiled and shifted, cocking my head at him.

"Then why do you look so afraid?" I asked coldly.

He sneered at that and screamed, sending his shadow rushing at me in a blur of motion. I tensed and focused on my shield bracelet, bringing its energies up around me for a moment to rebound the attack. When it did so, I let it fall and shifted back to the wolf, lunging at him again.

His shadow tore into my side, making me yelp in pain, but I kept going. And I saw the fear on Nicodemus' face as I slammed into him, shoving him to the ground.

I thrust my bared fangs in his face, snarling, then shifted back. Then I grabbed the noose around his neck before he could react and started twisting.

As he started to choke, I leaned down so my mouth was next to his ear.

"You made a mistake in your plans, Nic. If you'd come after just me, you probably would have killed me."

"But, no, you thought yourself _clever_ going after my kids," I hissed, twisting the noose more. "That was the _stupidest_ thing you could have done.

"Next stupid was threatening my _wife_."

"You were dead the moment you dared _touch_ them," I finished in a snarl, leaning back as his face started turning blue. That only made me sneer and twist the noose more.

His body started jerking underneath me and then his shadow pierced my back, causing me to arch backwards with a scream. But I didn't let go of that damn noose.

After a moment, the struggles stopped.

The daggers in my back simply dissipated and I whined through the pain as Lasciel healed the wounds again.

"Where's his coin?" I asked aloud as I took the noose from his neck, holding it loosely in my hand.

_I don't know. Let the fire consume his body. Then we will find it._

Nodding, I rose and looked down at the body that had been my enemy. And before that, a fiend. Before that…just a normal man.

I pitied him.

And I swore that I would not become that thing he had.

No more deals with the devil.

Turning, I ran at the door of the chapel, bringing my shield around me as I leapt over the fire. It still singed a bit but I made it to the other side. Then I turned and held out my hand, flicking my wrist at the room I had just escaped from.

I threw my will together and hissed, "_Ventus._"

Wind roared up in the room, sweeping the fire into a fury and destroying everything within. Small gusts blew fire out the door towards me but I stood far enough away that it didn't touch me.

As I watched the wind start to die down, banking a few of the fires as it did so, I heard the thump of metal behind me.

I knew who it was.

Waiting until he came to stand beside me, I said, "You're late."

Michael grunted and replied, "I didn't know of anything until Karrin called me."

Oh.

"Guess she told you what I did?"

"Yes."

"Elizabeth and Nick are in my truck," he said as I ducked my head. "And I found Mouse along the road. He's wounded but he'll live. Sanya's taking care of him."

"He's here too?"

"He actually felt something coming," replied Michael. Then he looked at me and said, "Harry…you could have come to me instead of doing this."

"He would have killed them if I had, Michael. I couldn't allow that."

"So you gave in."

I hissed and growled, "I made a deal to save my children, Michael. Not all of us have the Almighty to help us when we need it." When I realized what I had said, I breathed, "I'm sorry."

_He cannot understand your choice_, whispered Lasciel.

Looking up at my friend, I said, "I had no other choice."

"You fought him before."

"And nearly died. It was madness to take the coin up, yes…but it would have been mad as well to come here without it."

Michael sighed at that.

"Harry…"

"It's _done_, Michael." I tossed the noose at his chest and he caught it awkwardly in his mailed hands. "Nicodemus is dead. I don't have his coin to give you, unfortunately." Nodding at the enflame room, I added, "It'll be in there somewhere."

He nodded then said, "Harry…you know that if…"

"I know you'll be there if I start going off the deep end. Its reassuring." I turned and smiled at him as I said, "But you won't need to."

"You…you cannot trust her to keep her word."

"Yes, I can."

_I know why you call me a sentimental fool now, Lasciel._

She was silent for a moment at that then, _Why is that, wizard?_

_You're one too_, I replied.

Michael stared at me.

"Harry…"

_You're a fool, wizard._

"Michael."

_But a brave fool._

He sighed then said, "Be careful."

"I will," I assured him. When I heard the sirens, I said, "We probably shouldn't be here when they arrive."

"No," said Michael. Then he asked, "Is there anything that can come back to you from this?"

I smiled at that and replied, "Not unless they can connect fang marks to dental records."

Leaving him with that, I started walking towards the outside. It took him a moment to follow me.

Guess he had a hard time figuring out what I had meant.

When I reached his white pick-up, the passenger door flew open and Nick practically flew to me, his now free arms extended. I swept him up before he had quite reached me and hugged him tightly, not ever wanting to let go again.

Elizabeth slowly walked up to stand nearby and I could feel her frown. She stared at me as I looked at her and breathed, "Daddy…what did you do?"

I looked squarely back at her and replied, "What I had to in order to get you two back, munchkin."

She shook her head then moved to hug me, wrapping her arms around Nick as well. Her head leaned against my shoulder and I heard her sniff.

"I looked at you as I left," she whispered. "I couldn't help it. Not when I felt something was so wrong."

"Worse?" I queried.

"Complete."

Well that was a shock.

Though I guess it made a kind of sense. Picking up the coin had twisted me but not entirely. Taking it…I guess that finished what it was started.

Elizabeth turned her face up to me and said, "You look…like a wolf given human form. I…I guess that fits you, Daddy. But…"

"Still bad?"

"Still confusing."

Oh, the old 'how could an angel love a monster' thing.

Sighing, I said, "Lizzy."

She looked up at me and I continued, "Sometimes you don't deserve what you get. It just gets given to you because someone loves you." I shifted Nick to one arm and touched her face with my other hand. "I don't deserve you, Nick, or your mother. But I have you anyway and I will do anything to keep you."

My eldest stared at me then blinked when my son leaned back and looked at me with an understanding in his eyes that was stunning. He then looked down at his sister and said, "Daddy did something bad to do good. For us. 'Cause he loves us." Then he turned his dark eyes on me and cried, "I don't care! I love you always, Daddy."

Hells bells. The things children can say sometimes.

It can floor you.

I hugged Nick close then and kissed his head, murmuring, "I love you too, grasshopper. And I'll always protect you." Looking at Elizabeth, I brushed my thumb across her cheek. "And you too, Lizzy. Remember that."

She started crying silently at that and just nodded, smiling at me through the tears.

"Harry."

I turned and blinked at Michael, who had stripped off his armor at some point, and said, "Yeah?"

"Need a ride?"

I smiled at him and nodded, "Yeah. Yeah, I think we do. Plus you have my dog."

He just nodded and I felt a pang of regret. Because of what I'd done, I don't know if he would ever be able to trust me again. He would always think of the fact that I had let one of those things in my head and had done nothing of it.

And I didn't know what to do to get that friendship back now.

But that was something to worry about later. When things were settled and I had some other things figured out.

The ride was quiet and when we pulled up in the parking lot next to the Beetle, Elizabeth was the first out. I followed her with Nick in my arms, he having fallen asleep on the ride over. Sanya and Michael pulled Mouse out of the back of the truck and the big dog managed to make it on his own from there. He was limping but he was okay.

The door was open when I reached the bottom of the stairs and I saw Murph hugging the life out of Elizabeth. When she saw me, her gaze hardened and I steadied myself for what was to come.

Her hand slapping my face was expected.

Her then tugging me down into a kiss wasn't.

"If you _ever_ worry me like that again, I'll kill you," she hissed in a cold voice. Then she softened and I heard tears when she spoke again. "God, Harry…"

"They're safe, Murph," I assured her. "And I'm still here. I promise."

She looked at me for a moment then nodded, kissing me again. Then she went back inside and I followed, waving at Michael and Sanya before I closed the door. Their calculating gazes on my back was disturbing but they were justified in it.

Mouse settled down by the fire next to Mister and Elizabeth went downstairs, carrying a somewhat awake Nick with her. When the door into the sub basement closed, I sank down on the couch and pulled off the glove covering my hand.

Lasciel's coin made a loud, hollow sound as it hit the rug under my feet.

Murphy stared at it as it lay on the floor then said, "That's it?"

"That's it." Sighing, I picked up the coin and studied it in the light from the fireplace. "The last one now that isn't in the hands of the Knights."

"Harry…why haven't you given it to them?"

"Because doing that wouldn't have helped any. I would have had to give up my magic to be free of her influence, Murph."

I closed my eyes and finished, "I can't do that."

She sighed and I heard her move across the floor before her weight sank down next to me. Her arms wrapped around me and she leaned her head against my shoulder.

I could sense her gaze was on the coin in my hand.

"Now what?" she asked in a soft voice. "And do I know that this is really you and not this Lasciel?"

"Its me, Murph," I breathed, trembling. "Stars and stones, do you really think I would succumb to that?" I opened my eyes and looked at her, staring straight into her eyes. There was nothing to fear there…we had soulgazed years ago, right as our relationship began. "I have you and the kids here. And there is _nothing_ that can tear me away from you except death itself."

"God, _Harry._ I'm sorry."

"I know," I said. Then I smiled and added, "I love you, Murph."

"I love you too, you idiot," she said, laughing and crying all at once suddenly. I laughed too and wrapped an arm around her, kissing her forehead.

After a moment of sitting there, we both rose to our feet, our arms still around each other. She stood there looking at me for a moment as I held up the coin again.

"What are you going to do with it?" she asked.

I frowned then replied, "Put it away. And hope I never have to pick it up again."

_Very well. What I wanted done is done. I can abide being naught but a shadow in your mind, wizard._

Murphy nodded at that, saying, "I hope so too."

We walked into our bedroom then and I hid the coin at the back of our closet, in the same box I had stored everything left of Susan in. When I turned from doing that, I was grabbed and thrown onto the bed with Murphy hurling herself on top of me a moment later.

She kissed me and everything left my head – every worry and fear and all else. There was suddenly nothing but her, my angel.

I didn't deserve her.

I hurt her and did stupid things like striding right into the black heart of darkness itself, and charging in like a fool.

But I had her anyway, despite all that.

She loved me for a reason I couldn't begin to fathom.

Bless her for that.

I would be lost in the dark without her.


	10. Beautiful Day

**Title:** Beautiful Day  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for fluffiness and kittens.  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse...sequel to _Tread Lightly, Web Weaving, Life Refreshed, Soul Repair, Loss of Faith, Faerie Fire, Life Anew, Secrets,_ and _My Defending Angel_.  
**Summary:** There are things in life that are beautiful but heartbreaking all at the same time. Harry and Murphy are about to experience one such day.

* * *

"Oh God, oh God…" 

"Lizzy, calm down," I said, coming up behind her and placing both hands on her shoulders. Bending over her, I kissed her cheek and murmured, "You look beautiful."

"Dad, I…"

"Ah, no, no. If anyone needs to be panicking, it should be me. I'm the one losing my baby girl today, remember?"

Elizabeth turned to face me, beautiful despite the lack of make-up or anything of that sort. She wore a simple white dress that fell to her ankles and her only courtesy to a trinket or the life was the silver clasp that pinned back her dark hair in a bun. Her faerie-made bracelet would have been hanging from the same wrist on which her engagement ring sat but it wasn't the sort of thing you wore when you got married.

At least that's what Mamma Murphy said.

"I'm not going anywhere, Daddy," assured my daughter. She wrapped her arms around me as if to prove that as she continued, "We're going to live in Paul's apartment, so we'll be in walking distance."

"Three blocks."

"You walk that far taking Mouse out," she said with a smile.

I raised a finger at that. "Ah! Its more of a drag than a walk."

She laughed at that then we both blinked at a loud thump from across the room. Then the door opened and my nine-year-old poked his head sheepishly into the Sunday school room that had been taken over as the bride's changing room. Ah, kids. Always running into things.

"Dad, Gran'ma says you need to come out." Nick then looked at his sister and his jaw dropped a bit. "Hells bells, sis!"

"I hope that was a compliment, Nicky," said Elizabeth with a laugh. I chuckled and tousled my son's ducky blonde hair as I moved past him out the door.

"C'mon, grasshopper. Show me what your mother had gotten herself into now. Oh, and watch the language."

Nick flushed then jogged ahead of me, leading me to where Momma Murphy stood. From there I could see his mother going at it and groaned.

"Oh for the love of…doesn't he know by now not to piss her off?"

"Richard was never one to learn," muttered Momma Murphy. She then looked at me and asked, "Can you stop this? I can't get to my daughter in this state."

"I'll try, ma'am," I replied. Then I grabbed Nick and said, "All right, you know what to do."

He grinned and gave me a brief salute before running towards his mother. Mamma Murphy blinked and I explained, "I can't get through to her when she's like this either. But kids…ah, kids are cute. They can get through to anyone."

My words were proven a moment later when Murphy came towards us, fuming still, with Nick in her wake. I sighed and pulled my wife into a brief kiss, saying, "Murph, ignore him. You know he always tries to start something whenever he sees me."

"I wasn't going to let him get to me until he called you a bastard that had done nothing but ruin my life," growled Murphy. She ran a hand back through her hair irritably, showing off her scattering of graying hair, and added, "That I wasn't going to stand for, Harry."

Now that is why I love this woman.

And also don't want to get on her bad side.

"Good for you, dear," said Mamma Murphy with pride in her voice. She patted my arm and continued, "You caught a fine one, you did. And gave me this wonderful grandson here." Her arms caught Nick up then in a hug and he laughed as he turned to hug her back. "There is nothing to regret so ignore him. Now come along, its almost time."

"Time for me to be getting back to the bride then. Be good…_both_ of you," I said as I ruffled Nick's hair and kissed Murphy. I ignored her glare on my back as I headed off, weaving my way back across the church.

Elizabeth was ready and waiting at the door for me when I got there, fine shivers running through her. I touched her shoulders reassuringly and said, "Breathe, munchkin. You look beautiful. He's a nice guy. And if he hurts you, I'll break his kneecaps."

That made her laugh and lightly slap my arm.

"Daddy!"

"What? I will!"

She laughed more, making me smile as I offered her my arm. As her arm slipped into mine, I laid my hand over hers and squeezed gently. While we waited for the music, she seemed to be thinking.

"Daddy?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you."

I blinked and stared at her, just noticing that the music had started up. "For what?"

Elizabeth smiled and replied, "For being my dad and loving me so much. For doing what's right always. For protecting me from all the monsters."

Stars and stones.

How do you respond to that?

"I'm your father, baby," I found to say as we started moving. "For you, your mother, and Nick I'd do anything."

"I know," she whispered with tears in her eyes.

She knew maybe better than even Murphy the lengths I would go to.

Murphy knew me like no one else.

But my daughter had seen the evidence of the choices I had made.

We were walking down the aisle then, past all of the familiar and not-so-familiar faces. Her fingers fluttered underneath my hand and I squeezed then reassuringly. Then we were at the front of the church and I numbly replied to the preacher when I had to.

I leaned over and kissed my baby girl's cheek before placing her hand in Paul's shaking one. And I have her away.

It was one of the most painful things I have ever had to do.

As I sank down onto the nearby pew, Murphy slipped her hand into mine. I closed my large hand around hers, so tiny and frail compared to the one that gripped it to the unknowing eye. That hand could break me if it wanted to…but never would.

Hells bells, I loved this woman so much.

Even more so in this moment as I watched our daughter start a new life. I remembered that day when it had just been me, her, my brother, Michael, and Father Forthill in a little ceremony. Murphy hadn't wanted her mother to know she'd gotten pregnant before getting married and I wasn't one to argue.

Twenty-four years of marriage stacked on top of almost a decade of friendship was what she had given me that day. And two of the most wonderful kids I could have asked for.

Give me another twenty-four years with her and I could be happy forever.

"I now present, Mister and Missus Paul Osbourne!"

Applause exploded around us and the two young people blushed as they walked out amongst it. Murphy's hand was still in mine as we stood and she turned to smile at me.

"Love you," she murmured as we started walking out.

"Love you too," I replied.

As we stepped outside, I tilted my head back and squinted at the sky. "Beautiful day."

Murphy looked up and seemed confused at the sight of nothing but gray clouds on the horizon – it was suppose to rain tonight. Then she smiled as she realized what I was talking about. Both of our gazes fell on our ecstatic daughter as she hugged her brother then kissed her new husband warmly.

"It is a beautiful day," she murmured.

"Yeah," I said as I wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "It is."

It wasn't really but that wasn't what we were talking about.

Our daughter was starting a new life of her own.

And that made this cloudy day a beautiful one.


	11. Breakdown

**Title:** Breakdown  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for screaming fits, raging, and character death.  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse...sequel to _Beautiful Day, Tread Lightly, Web Weaving, Life Refreshed, Soul Repair, Loss of Faith, Faerie Fire, Life Anew, Secrets,_ and _My Defending Angel_.  
**Summary:** There are days when the world feels like it's going to fall apart around you. And sometimes...it does.

* * *

There are days when the world feels like it's going to fall apart around you. 

When my dad died, I felt like that.

When I nearly lost everything with Murph, I thought that.

When my kids were kidnapped, I felt that before the rage hit.

I haven't felt like that in a long while.

And I don't miss it.

But…sometimes, I guess those kind of days miss us.

I was down in the lab with Nick showing him just how to make potions, with Bob making jokes throughout it all. And telling about all of my horrible mock-up's of potions over the years.

Nick, fourteen now and all gangly limbs, laughed at the stories but paid attention to what I was showing him. Elizabeth had been more distracted by Bob at this point when I was teaching her. But her little brother was much more eager of a student and ready to learn.

When Mouse barked from upstairs, I knew someone was at the door. Leaving Nick with Bob to watch over him – not the brightest idea but I knew I could trust my son not to blow up the lab too much – I headed upstairs. Pushing Mouse back from the door, I opened it and blinked at who stood on the other side.

"Um…hi. You're…Polenski?"

"Polanski," corrected the young man. He smiled sheepishly and took off his hat, revealing an early balding scalp. "Um…Mister Dresden…"

"Yes?"

I knew the kid well enough from seeing him around SI. Murph had gotten her top spot over the department back when Stallings retired and Polanski was the newest of the lot. Good kid. He'd helped out a lot from what she'd said.

"There's…something's happened, sir."

A thousand things raced through my mind at that moment then settled on one possibility. All I could think then was, _Don't let it be that. Anything but that._

"What?" I asked. When he looked nervously at the ground, I lost my temper a bit and snapped, "C'mon, kid, I don't have all day!"

His gaze snapped up to mine and I knew what had happened before he even said the words. I hissed out a breath and closed my eyes as he said it.

"The Lieutenant…she, she got shot, sir. We…we tried to get her to the hospital but…I'm sorry."

"How?" I asked, my voice bare of emotion but low.

"N-nothing weird, sir. Just a routine sweep we've got orders to do. We didn't know a bank robber had been holed up in there."

"Did you get him?"

"Yes, sir."

"Good."

"Sir," said Polanski. I lifted my gaze to meet his and he took a step back with a gasp. "I'm sorry."

I watched him as he ran up the steps to the street, practically fleeing from me. Then I slowly closed the door and stood there, my hand clenching on the doorknob spasmodically.

Murph.

My Murph.

Dead.

I closed my eyes again and bowed my head, feeling the tears come. My shoulders shook and I sank against the door. I wanted to scream, to howl, to rage.

I wanted some emotion except the grief.

It wouldn't come.

_It wouldn't come._

All that came were the tears and my heart breaking.

I heard footsteps coming up out of the subbasement and Nick called, "Dad? What was Mouse barking about?"

He reached the top of the stairs and saw me, stopping in his tracks. I could see the look on his face without glancing at him.

"Dad?"

Pushing myself away from the door, I lifted my head to look at him. He stared at me, the expression on his face telling me he knew what had happened but didn't want to believe it. Wanted me to tell him it was all a lie.

I wanted someone to tell me that too.

"No," he breathed, shaking his head.

I just nodded, feeling hollow. My throat was suddenly dry and felt rough, like I had been screaming.

Nick closed his eyes and his thin shoulders shook. I wanted to go over and hug him, to tell him everything would be okay. But I couldn't.

My feet wouldn't move.

And I couldn't lie to him like that.

My brain kicked into gear without me and I walked back down to the lab, mechanically turning off the burner and dumping the potion. Bob didn't ask what had happened. He just breathed, "Harry, I'm sorry."

He'd heard. And he'd probably been the one to tell Nick to go upstairs.

I trudged back up the stairs and saw Nick sitting on the couch, holding a picture in his hand. Mouse sat next to him, his big head resting on his knee, and whining every few moments. After every whine, spidery fingers ran over the picture and fresh tears spilled down my son's face.

I wanted to go to him.

But I couldn't.

I couldn't help him with his grief when I couldn't get over my own.

Instead I walked into our – mine now, only mine – bedroom and collapsed onto the bed. For a moment I lay there, only feeling the numbness.

Then every emotion welled up and I howled animally, my fingers clutching at the blankets. I screamed until my throat really was raw and I kept going until I could make no noise. Then I just lay there, choking and sobbing amongst the sheets.

She was gone.

What did I have left now?

"You have your son," said a voice next to me. Phantasmal fingers ran through my hair and I opened my eyes to see Lasciel there, perched on the edge of the bed wearing black instead of white. She looked at me sorrowfully and breathed, "I am sorry, wizard. I truly am."

When she leaned forward, I feared for a moment she would take on Murphy's appearance. But she only kissed my forehead, a sensation that wasn't real, and murmured, "Truly I am sorry."

Then she was gone.

I closed my eyes again and buried my face in the blankets, breathing in the scent of Murphy that was still there. Tried to remember it for always because I knew it would fade.

Everything of her would fade.

She was gone.

And my heart was dead.

As I lay there and started to lose consciousness, I heard Nick pick up the phone. After a moment, he choked down a sob then spoke.

"Uncle Thomas…come over. Please. I…I need your help."

"M-Mom. Mom's d-de…"

He lost it and started crying then, a noise that shattered me into even more pieces. I heard the phone hit the floor then all left was the sound of him wailing, Mouse echoing it with a mournful howl a moment later.

I curled up into a ball and breathed, "Lasciel. Please."

_This will not make the pain go away._

"I know."

She appeared again and laid her hand on my forehead, her touch cool though it wasn't real.

"Sleep," she whispered.

And everything stopped.

* * *

"Nicky." 

I sniffed and looked up to see my sister standing over me, equally red-eyed and dressed in black. She sank down on the curb next to me outside of the funeral home and took my hands gingerly in hers.

"Where's the baby?" I asked softly, not wanting to dwell on why we were here.

"With Paul," she replied, her voice choked. "God, Nicky, I…"

I ducked my head and said, "Lizzy, don't."

"Don't what?" she asked. Her voice took on a slightly shrill tone as she continued, "Don't try to comfort you? Mom's…"

"_I know!_" I snarled at her. My temper – Dad's temper – flared and I spat, "I was _there_ when they told Dad, damnit! Do…" I choked as I tried to continue speaking. "Do you know how much it hurt to see him?"

"As much as it does now?"

"More," I breathed. My shoulders shook as more tears tried to come. "Why?" I hissed. "Why'd that bastard have to shoot Mom? Why not someone else?"

Elizabeth touched my face and said, "Nicky, don't think like that."

"Why not?! Why didn't he? Why did he have to shoot her, huh?! Why did he…why…_why…_"

I broke down sobbing in her arms and she started crying with me too. When she kept going, I stopped. I choked down the tears and pulled away from her, wiping my eyes on my sleeves. She stared at me and said, "Nicky…"

"No," I hissed, closing my eyes. "No, I can't do this anymore."

"You can't stop grieving, Nicky!"

Snarling, I opened my eyes and glared at her. She pulled back slightly and blinked at me, biting her lip.

"For Dad I can," I spat. I rose then and looked down at her, finishing, "And I will."

Then I turned and walked away, hearing her rise behind me. She called out, "You can't carry the world on your shoulders, Nicky!"

"Watch me," I growled as I kept walking.

My Dad needed me.

Lizzy was gone, moved out and had her own little family now.

I was all Dad had left.

And I wasn't going to let him down, damnit.

When I strode into the funeral home, I ran into Uncle Thomas, who was slouched in a chair with an arm around Molly. I didn't know her well as she'd finished her apprenticeship with Dad years before I was born but I had seen her. She'd come by the apartment to hang out with Lizzy and occasionally ask Dad something about magic.

We were the only one's in the entrance to the place. Uncle Thomas' eyes fixed on me and I walked towards him, cringing when Molly looked up, her blue eyes strained and red.

"Hi, Nick," she said softly. "You okay?"

When I glowered at her, she winced and breathed, "Stupid question. I'm sorry."

At her look, so lost and confused, I sighed. Shoulders slumped, I said, "S'alright. You're not the only one that's asked."

Uncle Thomas peered at me and said, "You look…determined."

How the heck could he see _that?!_

My surprise must've shown on my face because he chuckled – a hollow sound that made Molly and I cringe.

"You've got your dad's look," he explained. Then he glanced up behind me and I turned to see Dad there, looking like a ghost next to the man I knew to be Molly's father. I remembered him vaguely carrying me on an armored shoulder as Lizzy and I ran from the thing that had kidnapped us. The thing Dad had fought for us.

Glancing at Dad again, I almost starting tearing up for what seemed like the hundredth time since this whole sorry thing had started. He was a pale shadow of the man I knew as my dad and didn't look like he was here at all. His mind was gone but his body had been left behind.

"Michael," said Uncle Thomas, trying not to look at Dad at all. "Is it time?"

"Almost," replied the Knight.

"Then lets go inside," said Lizzy's voice from behind me as she came in. I stiffened briefly then was pushed forward by my sister's hand on one shoulder and my uncle's on the other.

The funeral I don't remember. I blocked it from my mind. The only thing I couldn't remove was the image of Dad, standing there like a ghost.

That one wouldn't go away because I had to live with it.

Dad's old mentor came to stay with us a few days after that. I'd heard Dad talk about him before and Hog Hollow. It had sounded nice.

Mom had suggested we take a vacation and go there this summer.

A summer she'd never see.

I was cooking when he arrived, wispy white hair wrapped in a cloak with a gnarled old staff. He blinked at me as I opened the door and said, "You've gotten taller since I last saw you."

"I wouldn't know," I replied. "I don't remember you."

"I'd imagine not," he said as he came in, the wards not making a peep about it. He hung up his cloak and leaned his staff next to Dad's before moving further into the apartment. I ignored him and let him do what he wanted, heading back to the kitchen to continue cooking.

"What are you making?"

"Soup," I replied. "It's…it's the only thing Mom would let me cook."

"I see."

Turning, I saw him standing by the fireplace staring into it with a solemn expression. With a snort, I moved the pot off the eye and turned off the stove, snapping a lid down over the soup so the heat wouldn't escape. Then I stalked over and planted myself in front of him, snarling, "Just what are you doing here?"

"I'm here to teach you," he replied, still staring past me at the fire. "And to keep an eye on Hoss."

Dad. He was here to watch Dad.

"Why?" I growled. "We don't need anyone to help us."

He looked up at me and smiled, shaking his head.

"You really are your father's son."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?!"

"Is that how you were taught to speak to your elders?"

I stiffened and spat, "No."

He arched an eyebrow and I finished, "Sir."

"Better. My name is Ebenezar if Hoss didn't tell you. The Council wants someone to keep an eye on him…and you. I happened to volunteer."

"Why?" I hissed. I'd been to a Council meeting – once. When I'd turned ten and all of my magic had started developing. Dad had taken me there to tell them he was taking me on as an apprentice – they'd sneered at us and I'd heard none too few muttering horrible things.

I hated them.

They didn't care about my family.

Why should I give a shit about them and their rules?

I'd asked Dad that when we'd gotten back in the Beetle. He'd just frowned and told me that I was right…they didn't care about us. But if we didn't follow the rules, they'd know it. And they weren't afraid to mete out a death sentence on a child.

I hated them.

Because they scared the shit out of me.

"Because they think he'll snap?" I continued with a snarl. "Why don't they just go ahead and kill him since they seem to be continually sitting their with the axe at the ready?!"

"Because they are scared of him." Ebenezar turned away from me as I stood there, stunned, then said, "They always have been. And they have always been expecting him to slip up and fall."

"Dad would never."

"Never before now."

"He would _never_," I screamed, losing my temper. My fists lashed out before I could quite stop them and I only managed to just before I hit the old wizard. My knees went weak a second later and I slumped to the floor, hugging myself and snarling, "Dad would never do that. Not now, not _ever_."

"Lad…"

"No, no, _no!_" I howled, shaking my head as wildly as Mouse did when his fur was wet. "He wouldn't. I know it. Shut up, shut up, _shut up!_"

Ebenezar sighed and said, "Lizbeth was right. You are very much like him."

I lifted my head at that and snarled, "So what?"

"Its not a bad thing, lad. In fact…it's something to be proud of. Being like your father is nothing to fault. Just be careful; what he has passed on to you are what have gotten him into so much trouble over the years."

"Mistakes get made," I said in a tired voice. The anger was draining away, leaving me as empty as I'd been when I heard Mom had died. "No matter what we do, they do. If I make them, so be it."

"I want to do what's right. I want to believe in people. I want to help them. I want…I want…" I trailed off and closed my eyes against the tears that wanted to come. "I want my dad back."

Ebenezar laid his hand on my shoulder and I looked up at him, seeing understanding and compassion in his eyes.

"I know, lad," he said softly, an accent coming into his voice. "We'll work on that. I'm here for him too."

"But…you said…"

"My official reason. I taught him. I know him. And I'm here to help him if I can."

I frowned, biting my lip.

"And me?"

"And you."

Ebenezar smiled then extended his other hand to help me up. I stared at it for a moment then glanced towards the door that led to where my dad lay in a daze.

Then I took the old wizard's hand and let him pull me up.

Pull me up to stand and be strong again.

I had to be.

Dad needed me to be.

And…and I needed me to be.


	12. Come Together

**Title:** Come Together  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for mild language.  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse...sequel to _Breakdown, Beautiful Day, Tread Lightly, Web Weaving, Life Refreshed, Soul Repair, Loss of Faith, Faerie Fire, Life Anew, Secrets,_ and _My Defending Angel_.  
**Summary:**You survive how you can when the world falls apart. And you hope for something to change, to bring the world back together just a little bit. Sometimes it doesn't. But, sometimes, it does.

* * *

Three weeks. 

It's been three weeks since Mom died. And Dad is still not really here.

Everyone has visited at least once to give their apologies again.

And I swear I am going to scream at the next one.

I'm tired of the apologies.

I'm tired of the pitying looks.

I'm tired of the whispers behind my back.

I'm tired of not having a father.

Next person that pisses me off is getting a fireball in the face. Fuck the Council and their damn rules.

I don't care anymore.

All I want is my dad back.

Can't I have that?

Can't I?

"Hey, Dresden!"

I slowed down and came to a halt, turning slowly to look at whoever had called out to me. The spell I wanted was already in my head and I was gathering the will to cast it before I caught myself.

"Fuck, Virg," I snarled as my only friend that actually believed in magic ran up to me. She was panting hard and just stood there trying to breathe as I glowered at her. "I was about to throw a fireball at you."

"You'd never do that, Dres," she said as she got her breath back and straightened. Shoving back long hair that was dyed in a rainbow of colors, she gave me a square look. "And, c'mon, you can't be that bad out of it. I know you've been pissed before but never enough to actually use magic in public."

I kicked at the sidewalk and spat, "I stopped giving a shit about it."

"Dres…"

"Look, Virg, just go away, okay? I don't need this right now."

"Don't need your friend?" she asked, planting herself in front of me as I tried to keep walking. "Dres, don't do this to me. C'mon, I'm the only one that doesn't call your dad crazy. Talk to me."

I glared at her and snarled, "I don't want to talk about it, Virginia."

"Damnit, don't call me that."

Virginia Wakefield, daughter of a pretty well off family but as rebellious as you could get, better known to the denizens of our high school as Virg. She was fifteen, lived with her nineteen-year-old boyfriend, had hair like a hippy's nightmare, and more piercing's than I cared to think about. Plus…her parents supported her _and_ her pot-smoking boyfriend.

Makes me wonder what the heck is wrong with the world.

"Fine," I said, frowning down at her. "You want to know my problems, Virg? All right, I'll tell you my problems. I'm fourteen and feel like the whole damn world is out to get me. Though, in my case, it might actually be. With my luck and my Dad's, it probably is."

"My mom is _dead_ and my sister is too occupied with my nephew to do shit. I have an uncle that's a freaking _incubus_ and is the only family I have left beside my immediate. And to top that off, my dad has left the damn building and gone traipsing through the ethereal daisies!"

Virg stared at me then hissed, "Damnit, Dres, why the hell don't you ever ask for help?"

"What can you do? Break my dad out of whatever he's fallen into? _I_ can't even do that."

"Okay, maybe I can't help. But I can be there for you, Dres." She sighed heavily and reached out to twine her fingers in my shirt, jerking me forward into a hug. I was tall enough and gangly that it worked against her average height and stocky frame. Plus my center of gravity sucks. "Jesus Christ, man, trust me to be there for you."

Sighing, I closed my eyes and nodded numbly.

"All right. All right, Virg."

"You promise? You promise this isn't bullshit and you're not going to just blow me off?"

"Promise."

She nodded and pulled away from my, reaching up to pat my cheek. "Good."

What the heck is it with me and my dad befriending women that can get us to do anything?

Virg tugged on my arm and folded it about hers, sort of like I'd seen my dad do at Lizzy's wedding. Then she started up marching down the sidewalk away from school towards my house.

I could have broken her grip – Mom had started teaching me aikido before Dad had starting teaching me magic – but I didn't. She'd have just slapped me and done it again.

I didn't have the energy to want the trouble.

So I tromped in the door with her right behind me and got to see Ebenezar looking both surprised and amused. Virg arched an eyebrow then leaned over and whispered, "Who's the old guy?"

"That 'old guy'," I replied _sotto voce_, "is my dad's old teacher. Be nice. Y'know, like your up 'n up parents taught you to be oh so many centuries ago?"

She punched me in the side and growled, "I know how to be nice, Dres." Then she walked over to where Ebenezar sat on the couch and freakin' _curtsied_, smiling politely.

It all was broken when she whirled back towards me and thumbed her nose at me.

"There yah go, Dres. Was that polite enough?"

"Yes," I replied. "But you broke the whole thing just now."

"Eh, who cares." Turning back to Ebenezar, she said, "Hi, I'm Virg."

"A pleasure, young lady," he said, smiling at her. Then he glanced at me and asked, "Friend or…"

"Just friend," I said hastily. I wouldn't date Virg if she were the last female on earth. Nice girl and I liked her as a friend but… no. Just _no._

He nodded and I grabbed Virg's arm, tugging her away from him and downstairs into my room. She flung herself onto my bed and lay there whilst I tossed my backpack off to the side then crashed into my desk chair. After a moment she pushed herself up onto her elbows and looked at me, laughing. When I glared at her, she said, "Sorry, Dres. You just look so silly like that."

Scowling, I slouched down further in the chair, hooking my elbows around the arms so I wouldn't slip out. I stretched out my legs as far as they would go then growled, "Can't help it. I look silly doing pretty much anything if you hadn't noticed."

"True." Then she cocked her head to the side and asked, "So, why's the old guy here?"

"Teaching me while my dad's out of it. And to watch him."

"Huh?"

"Remember when I told you there was stuff about magic I couldn't tell you?"

"Yeah."

I looked over at her and said, "This is one of them."

Virg huffed at that. "Wish you wouldn't keep shit from me, Dres."

"Knowing this could get you hurt, Virg. Or killed."

"Shouldn't I be allowed to make that choice on my own? I mean, c'mon, I'm not going to run away screaming, you know that. Heck, I helped you and your dad with those…what were they?"

"Harpies."

"Yeah!"

Sighing, I growled, "No, Virg."

"Damnit, Dres, stop trying to protect me. I can do that myself."

"Can't."

"Why the hell not?"

"Because."

She glared at me at that then slid off my bed, picking up her bag where she'd dropped it on the floor. Stalking over to me, she hissed, "If you're going to be a dick about this, I'll just leave."

"Fine," I grumbled.

Rolling her eyes, she turned away from me with a snort and started up the stairs. As she raised the trapdoor, she looked back at me sadly.

"The world hasn't ended yet, Dres."

Then she was gone, the door banging down behind her. I dimly heard her say goodbye to Ebenezar and groaned, hurling myself from chair to bed.

What the hell was I doing?

Oh, yeah, alienating the only person I actually considered a friend. Right. Yay for me.

But what could I do? The one person I could really talk to wasn't going to respond to anything.

Guess I could always go up and just talk.

Yeah, I could do that.

* * *

"What's that noise?" 

"The boy," replied Lasciel as she appeared next to subconscious Harry in the circle of light in which he sat grumpily. She still wore black but her hair was now down.

"Trying to pull the idiot out of it? That won't work," he sneered. "Not when you did whatever to knock him out."

The fallen angel sniffed and said, "I released that when he stopped screaming. It's been his choice to remain here."

"Oh goody. We're never going to get anywhere now."

"Have some faith."

The subconscious glared at the fallen and said, "Faith? This coming from _you_? What a joke."

Lasciel sighed and turned away from him, wrapping her arms about herself. She closed her eyes and murmured, "A joke? I fear not." Then she laughed, the sound harsh and grating on the ears. "The wizard knows the truth."

"_Him?_ He can't figure out crap."

"He is a fool, yes," she said. "Sentimental and brave. He knows what I am."

The subconscious sniffed imperiously at that.

"Is this some kind of bullshit that you two are the same?"

"We have all been sentimental fools."

"Not me."

"You are the exception."

He grinned at that then it faded as something shifted in the dark surrounding them. Sighing, he ducked his head and said, "Hells bells, the idiot needs to come back." Then he looked at her and asked, "Can't you do anything, Miss High and Mighty?"

"No," replied Lasciel. "There is nothing that I can do."

She then tilted her head and sighed. The subconscious blinked at her and asked, "What?"

"The boy. He's crying."

"So? Block him out?"

"Someone should listen," she said softly. "Even if it isn't who he wants to hear it."

"He doesn't know you hear him. Never will if the idiot had anything to do with it."

"That doesn't matter. That someone listens, whether one knows it or not, does."

The subconscious snorted then sprang to his feet as there was an echoing, animal howl from the dark around them.

"Holy shit. And you want the kid to get through to _that_?"

The fallen sighed and said sadly, "No. I want him to get through to the man still beneath that. That we hear? That is grief. Even you should recognize that."

"Sue me, I never paid attention in school." He then glared at her and added, "That I never went is beside the point."

"As you say."

There was another howl from the dark then a whimper from the edge of the circle of light. The subconscious just stared at the spot while Lasciel slowly moved forward, crouching down near it.

"Do you hear that, wizard?" she asked. "That is your son, lost and alone."

The tips of three fingers slid into the circle then Harry's voice hoarsely breathed, "Hurts. Still hurts…so…much."

"It will always hurt. But will you wallow here forever? That was not what I intended when I accented to your request."

She sighed and continued, "There are still reasons for you to live."

"Nick," whispered Harry. "Lizzy."

"Yes."

The dark shifted then Harry dragged himself into the circle of light, more worn and weary looking than he had ever appeared before. Even when he had been beaten up more than once in a single day _and_ shot.

"Okay," he said, looking from Lasciel to his surprised subconscious.

The fallen angel smiled and said, "Then awaken."

His subconscious grinned and waved.

"Later, idiot."

And I woke up.

It took a bit for everything to register itself – all I could do for a while was think. For a little while I wondered if it would be better to crawl back into that hole I'd dug myself into.

Then I heard the crying.

Hells bells, what had I done?

Opening my eyes felt like lifting a boulder. But I managed it and blinking a few times made the feeling go away. When things came into focus, I saw Nick sitting on the edge of the bed. He was turned with his back away from me and had his head in his hands, thin shoulders shaking.

I licked my lips and tried speaking. My voice was hoarse but it worked.

"Grasshopper."

Nick stiffened then turned towards me in shock, his dark eyes wide. He stared at me for a moment then his eyes narrowed with more tears.

"D-Dad?"

I just nodded and he flung himself onto me, babbling between sobs. Nothing needed to be said by me. I just wrapped my arms around him and let him go.

When he stopped and pulled away from me, I slowly pushed myself upright. I closed my eyes briefly as the grief tried to consume me again. Then I opened them quickly and looked at my son, carving his blotchy and tear-stained face into my memory.

This is what I had to keep going for.

Murph would kick my ass in the hereafter if I didn't.

Nick looked at me closely then asked, "You're here right? For real?"

"I'm here," I replied, reaching out to grasp his shoulder. "Stars and stones, I'm sorry."

He laughed at that and shook his head.

"I don't care," he said, more tears flowing. "I'm just glad you're back, Dad. That's all I wanted."

I tugged him into a hug this time, holding him tightly. As he hugged me back, the bedroom door opened and I was surprised when Ebenezar looked in.

He just smiled and nodded at me before slipping back out. The door closed behind him with a soft click and I tried to wrap my head around why he was here. Then I stopped.

That wasn't my concern right now.

My boy, too much like me for his own good, was.

Lasciel was right; the pain would never fade away. But I had to keep going – keep living.

If I gave up just like that…Murph would be disappointed with me. I could hear her now, calling me a sissy and telling me to get my ass in gear.

There were still things to do.

And I was going to do them.


	13. Move Forward

**Title:** Move Forward  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for mild language and some violence.  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse, AU after _Proven Guilty_...sequel to _Come Together, Breakdown, Beautiful Day, Tread Lightly, Web Weaving, Life Refreshed, Soul Repair, Loss of Faith, Faerie Fire, Life Anew, Secrets,_ and _My Defending Angel_.  
**Summary:** Shit happens in life, that's a given. When it does, you have to accept it and move forward. Harry can accept his wife's death. But can others accept their own truths as he has?

* * *

It's been two years. 

Two years since Murph was ripped out of our lives, not by a monster, but by a vanilla human.

She faced down so much shit with me and it was the regular's, the one's she took her job to protect, that got her. If it didn't hurt so much still, I'd laugh at the irony.

Two years and it still hurts.

To think, finding my thoughts drift to her only to remember she's gone.

To go to sleep, knowing she won't be beside me.

To wake up, knowing I won't see her face.

To live, knowing she's not here.

But, somehow, I manage to struggle and move on.

Mainly because of the sixteen-year-old who just came in the door looking like someone ran over his puppy.

"Girl troubles, grasshopper?" I asked as he threw his backpack down and flopped onto the couch in a flail of long limbs. Nick just groaned back at me and I sighed before grabbing two Coke's from the refrigerator. Strolling over, I tossed him one and sank down in a chair, popping the top on mine and taking a swig.

"Okay, what? Failed a test miserably?"

"I wish," he sighed. Frowning at the Coke can, he asked, "Dad…what do you do when you can see someone doing something wrong but can't stop them without alienating them?"

I blinked at that then set down my Coke on the scarred coffee table.

"Okay, spill it, now. What's going on and who's in trouble that you know?"

Nick sighed and sat up, fiddling with the Coke can as he gathered his thoughts. Then he bit his lip and ducked his head, muttering, "Its Virg. She's…damnit, Dad, she's living with a White Court vamp now. I think she might have started to become addicted to what they do but…"

"You don't know the signs like I do," I said softly.

"Or Uncle Thomas."

"Right. Did you happen to catch the vamp's name?"

He shrugged and replied, "She called him Eric but that could be a false name – did say his last name was Raith though, same as Uncle Thomas'. Everything else she told me about him was just about how wonderful he was and how great…erm…how great the _y'know_ was."

I blinked then felt a smile twitching at the corner of my lips.

"Sex?"

Nick flushed bright pink and ducked his head.

"Y-yeah."

Good to know my son wasn't out banging every female that walked by. Less good to realize that he probably had nothing to do with any girl except his best friend because of the life I led. And the life he was probably going to end up leading right beside me because the boy had too much of dear old me in him than should be legal.

"Okay," I said. "I'll call your Uncle and see if he knows anyone in the Court that might be this guy. Then we go snooping."

"We?" queried Nick as I got up and reached for the phone sitting on the table next to him.

"Yup."

Quickly I called up my brother and gave him the rundown, to which he sighed and growled something about the stupidity of youth. Then he promised to look into it and get back to me when he could. Which meant he'd probably end up showing up in person.

Thumping the phone back down, I tugged him up off the couch and said, "Okay, grasshopper, let's go investigating."

"Dad."

"Mmmhmm?"

"You do realize that I don't know where she's living now, right?"

I sighed and plucked a hair off of his Led Zeppelin t-shirt, holding it up so the light from the fire playing through the rainbow dye.

"Don't need to," I said with a smirk. He blinked at me then grinned and nodded.

"Okay, I'll get my stuff."

"You weren't wearing it?" Sonova…I thought I'd taught the boy better than that!

Nick paused and held up his right hand, showing off a silver band about his wrist the width of my thumb and a silver ring of the same type. Both had runes carved into them around the inside and the band was basically a simpler version of my shield bracelet. When powered up it snapped a shield up in front of but it was more like an actual shield. I could wrap mine around me; Nick's could only block things coming at him from the front. The ring didn't do much except be a beacon linked to a similar ring I wore and a tiny shield that was welded to Mouse's collar. All he had to do was send a bit of energy into it and the two pieces it was linked to would burn sharply for half a second, letting us know he was in trouble.

"Talking about my other stuff, Dad," he said with a grin.

"You can bring the knife," I said as he tromped downstairs. "But leave the sword and the wand where they are!"

"Damnit!"

I sighed and shook my head at that, listening to him as he grumbled. He'd learn eventually that walking into a situation armed for bear when you didn't know what exactly what was going on wasn't the best idea. I'd done that one time too many and had nearly gotten killed because of it.

When Nick came back upstairs, I had rings, shield bracelet, pentacle, and a few other handy gadgets at the ready. I left my blasting rod and staff by the door…tools of subtlety they aren't. More ka-boom than subtlety. Kinda like me, heh.

I clipped Mouse's leash on then look at my son.

"Ready?"

"Yup."

Good enough for me.

To the battle car then, ie: my immortal Volkswagen Beetle!

Outside by the car, I handed Mouse's leash to Nick and crouched down to sketch out a circle on our top step. Digging out a compass that had been Murph's, I wound Virg's hair around a piece that stuck out from it. Then I laid it inside the circle and closed it off with an effort of will.

"_Findus_," I breathed, focusing my thoughts. Then I shoved my will into the tracking spell and the needle of the compass started whirling wildly. When it stopped, the arrow wavering northeasterly, I broke the circle and picked up the compass.

"Got it?" asked Nick. I just glowered at him and he shrugged sheepishly.

My forte might be blowing shit up but I had lots of practice at tracking. Piss off all ye that have me in doubt.

"That's your next thing to work on now," I said as I coaxed the Beetle to life. "Maybe you can find those last two report cards that went mysteriously missing."

Nick paled at that and I grinned at him.

I'm a parent and I'm allowed to be evil to my children. Shush.

Then the old car puttered to life and we zipped away, my gaze flicking every once in a while down to the compass. It pointed unerringly in Virg's direction and if I hadn't had so much practice driving after things, I'd have gotten frustrated with all of the turns and twists I had to make.

Lucky me, that's not something that bothers me.

That her hair led us to a bad part of town…now that did.

Nick stared around in shock and breathed, "This…this can't be right. Dad, you must've gotten something wrong."

I snorted at that then eyed a small group of people hunkered in an alley suspiciously as we passed. "How's that?"

"Virg's parents may let her run wild but they always made sure she was somewhere safe. They paid for her place with her last boyfriend."

"Maybe they got tired of it," I muttered, eying the compass. The needle had flicked backwards now and I spared a glance at the rearview mirror. A condemned building stared back at me and I scowled.

Not good.

Not good at all.

Knew I should have brought a gun.

"No," insisted Nick. "I've met them. They're stupid but they love her. And she them no matter how badly she talks about them."

"Okay, okay. Look, we just passed the building she's in so we know where she's at. I'm going to turn around now…"

"_WHAT?!_"

I scowled at him for the outburst and growled, "Just _listen_. This isn't the sort of neighborhood we need to just go poking around in without knowing anything. We're going to go back home and I'm going to see what I can get out of Little Chicago. Alright?"

Nick sneered for a moment, anger flaring in his eyes, then it all collapsed. He slumped in his seat and nodded, prompting Mouse to lean over and rest his head on his shoulder with a soft whine.

"Okay," he murmured.

Sighing, I reached out and ruffled his hair as I made an illegal u-turn; in this area, crap like that didn't matter.

"We'll find her, grasshopper. I promise you that," I said softly.

"I know, Dad." Nick turned and looked out the window, dark eyes focused on the building we had been pointed to as it faded behind us. "I know."

I nodded then sighed as I pressed my foot down more on the accelerator and pushed the Beetle above the usual speed limit. It was afternoon and I'd already done one spell with the piece of Virg's hair that I had. Since I had managed that, it had clung to Nick's shirt sometime this morning, not anytime earlier.

After already being used once, I didn't have much more time to go on before it turned useless.

So I broke a few traffic laws and ran a few red lights; no biggie.

Back at the house, I told Nick to take Mouse for a walk and headed inside to the lab. Bob groaned as I slammed through the door and I snarled at him.

"No time to whine. We have a missing girl."

I grabbed his skull from the shelf without further ado and plopped it down in the middle of Lake Michigan. "It good to go?" I asked as I took a few breaths to calm myself.

"Yes, it's working fine," drawled Bob. "Now what's going on, Harry?"

"Nick's friend is apparently bunking up with a White Court vamp."

"Well good for her."

I rolled my eyes and said, "Its _not_ Thomas, Bob." My brother may not look it too much but he's six years my senior. Whilst I forgot my age when I had a grandkid, I knew I was no spring chicken.

Well…at least not in human standards.

Wizard standards are an entirely different ballgame.

Plus…teenage girl with my brother? Ew.

Bad thoughts. Bad, bad thoughts.

"Oh."

"Yeah, _oh_."

"Okay," said Bob, spinning in the middle of the lake. "Its ready to go. You have something to track her with?"

I rolled my eyes and pulled out the compass, unwinding the hair from it. Bob balked at that and muttered, "Harry…you do realize…"

"I realize I don't have that much time more to work with this, Bob. Can we go now?"

"Okay. Okay, sure, boss."

I nodded and closed my eyes, slowly clearing my head of everything that would get in the way of the spell. It all got brushed aside and I wound Virg's hair around my right hand then extended it out above the miniature city.

"_Findus_," I breathed, carefully gathering up my will. "_Findus verus._"

The magic rushed out in a swirl to encompass the tiny city and my mind followed it, tracing it along the streets. I saw the pewter buildings rush by in a blur then the spell reached the area where we had found Virg. When collecting pieces for this, this had been one of the places I had been nervous about going through. But I'd done it anyway and thank goodness that I had.

The spell zoomed in on the building and I saw something there I never wanted to see again.

More especially, it was something I wanted to wipe off the face of the planet.

Drawing back with a snarl, I flung the magically spent hair from my hand and grasped the edge of the table with my gloved one. Closing my eyes tight, I took a few deep, slow breaths to calm the anger flaring through me.

That…that _monster._

"Harry?"

"Yeah?" I growled through clenched teeth.

"What'd you see?"

I hissed then opened my eyes, turning my head to glower at him. His eye lights dimmed at whatever fury might have shown on my face and muttered, "Oh. Bad?"

I bared my teeth and snarled, "Bastard is tormenting that girl, Bob. He fools her mind in the mornings and makes her feel wonderful enough to go to class and act normal. When she comes back to him…she crumbles. And he torments her." My right fist clenched and I didn't realize it until I heard my knuckles creaking. "Son of a bitch."

"Harry…"

"I know, I know. Think logically and don't go in with all guns blazing."

Bob sighed and said, "I was actually going to tell you that your son has been listening in on this entire conversation."

Fuck.

"NICOLAS!" I roared, striding out of the lab and into his room. A quick glance showed his sword, a whip-lashy little thing Ramirez had given him and the rowan wand that was a smaller equivalent to my blasting rod were gone. I charged up the steps into the main part of the apartment to find the door open and both my son and Mouse gone, either running down the roads or already in a cab.

Well at least he'd been smart enough to take the dog.

But sixteen or not, I was going to beat him black and blue when I dragged his ass back home.

_Now_ it was time to bring out the bear hunting gear.

The .44 went in the pocket of my duster and I hooked my blasting rod on the inside. As I grabbed my staff and briefly debated going to the _real_ heavy weaponry, a tentative knock on the door stopped me.

"Harry? Someone break in?" asked Thomas as he leaned in the door. Despite the years I knew he had on him, he didn't look that much different than he did before. Me? Wear, tear, years, and Murph's death had done their number on me – I was surprised I hadn't started going gray as of yet.

"More like broke out," I replied. "Any ideas who the vamp is?"

"Spawn of one of my sister's. He's a pest according to Lara and has been accordingly disowned," he replied. Then he slung the bag he carried from his shoulder and unzipped it, pulling out a heavy cavalry saber. "I'm ready to go hunting, little brother."

I nodded and strode towards the door, pushing him out in front of me. "Good," I said as we mounted the stairs and headed towards the Beetle. "Because not only do we have a girl, we now have my wayward, half-trained son throwing his nose into things."

"At least he has Mouse with him. Or that's what I assume since said monster isn't here."

"He does," I said, coaxing the Beetle to life. As I pulled out into the road and got set to drive like a maniac, I frowned. "Thomas."

"Yes?"

"Buckle up."

He blinked then moved towards the seatbelt.

He managed to get it buckled before I slammed my foot on the accelerator and shoved the Beetle for all it was worth. Which can be a lot when I push the little car to it.

We reached the building in what might have been record time and I sprang from the car, ignoring Thomas as he briefly staggered out. Scowling at the building, I hefted my staff from the back seat and pointed the end of it at the boarded up front door.

Nick looked to have sneaked in.

I wasn't going to be anything so subtle.

Gritting my teeth, I snarled, "_Ventus!_"

Wind roared from my staff and slammed into the door, knocking boards and the door into the building and embedding them almost entirely in a wall. I strode through the entrance and took a glance around at the place, which was a hive for every pest you could imagine and was a complete mess. Ruined food was thrown everywhere along with clothing no sane person would ever wear again.

Stepping through all of this, I headed upstairs with my brother right behind me. The fact that the door at the top of the stairs was locked didn't stop us at all. Thomas moved around me and did the courtesy of kicking it in, rushing in with his sword at the ready. I charged in behind him and saw red as I spotted the vampire choking the life out of my son.

Darting around Thomas, I gripped my staff in both hands and ran towards him, throwing enough will into the staff to have the runes flare with Hellfire. The vampire turned just as I got on top of him and earned a hefty whack in the face with a solid piece of wood with a huge chunk of anger behind it. It screamed and fell back, letting Nick fall to the floor and lay choking for breath.

I stood in front of him and drew out my .44, aiming it at the vampire as it came to its feet. Shining silver eyes stared into mine and it hissed, "Dresden." Then those eyes flicked to Nick behind me and widened in fear. "Your…"

"My son, yeah," I snarled. My finger clenched on the trigger then pulled entirely, firing a bullet straight into the shocked vampire's head. He flew backwards, hitting the floor hard, and I strode forward to kick him sharply in the kidneys, screaming incoherently at him. When he snarled and grasped at my foot, I shot him two more times, in the cheek and the shoulder. As he screamed, I started kicking him again, snarling with each kick.

"You. Do. Not. Do. That. To. _Children!_"

"Mercy!" screamed the vampire, pale bleed leaking everywhere. "I didn't know! I didn't know she was yours, wizard!"

Growling, I leaned down and spat, "Well that was your mistake, wasn't it?"

"_Mercy!_"

"No," I replied stonily and fired the rest of the rounds in the .44 into his head. Pale blood spattered over my coat, jeans, and boots as well as the floor as well as bits of his skull. He was as dead as a vampire could be but I still wanted to take out the rest of my fury on his corpse.

My brother's hand on my shoulder made me close my eyes and take a deep breath.

"Harry…"

"I'm alright," I breathed. "How are they?"

"It'll take her some time to recover," replied Thomas. "But I can help her, I think. Nick's throat is a bit bruised but beyond that he's fine. Except…"

"Except what?"

"Except for the fact that he just saw you so cold-bloodily kill something…even if it was a monster."

I groaned and opened my eyes, turning my head to look at my son. Nick had moved and was sitting on a battered old mattress with his arms wrapped around a sobbing Virg. His gaze met mine and he turned away, burying his face in his best friends rainbow colored hair.

Great. Here I went again scaring the crap out of my kids.

Sighing, I said, "Let's get them out to the car. Damnit, where's Mouse?"

A whine answered me and I saw my big dog limp into the room, blood matting his fur from a gash on his shoulder. If the vampire hadn't already been dead, that would have accounted for another bit of damage done to him.

Walking over, I checked the big dog's wound, finding it not to be that deep and could wait for attention until we got back home. The reason he hadn't had his teeth around the vampire's throat ended up being the fact that one of his hind legs had been snapped like a twig in the bear trap I saw at the back of the room. Obviously it had been guarding the way he and Nick had come in through and Mouse had been in front, ending up being the one to fall into it.

Slowly Thomas and I managed to get all three of them downstairs and into the Beetle. I scowled at the building as he settled Virg in the backseat then thumped my staff against the ground. Hellfire blazed up in response and I peered at it for a moment, contemplating.

Then I set fire to that fucking building and smiled as it started to burn.

"Harry." I heard the disapproval in my brother's voice but didn't care.

"Not the first time I've done arson," I said casually as I got into the car. As I cranked it, I glanced in the rearview mirror, looking at Virg and Nick. "She doesn't need it to be still standing after what she's gone through."

He sighed in response, which was his assent to that being true, then was silent the entire trip back. The whole car was silent pretty much except for the sound of Virg's sniffs and Mouse's occasional whine.

When we got back home, I quietly asked Thomas to take Mouse to the vet. I could handle settling Virg down and letting her sleep in safety on my own.

And I needed to have a talk with my son.

My brother assented to the task and I carefully pulled the girl out of the car, telling my dog to stay. Mouse whuffed at me then laid down in the backseat, head on his paws. Thomas glanced at him then smiled at me before he got into the car and went puttering off in it to get my dog fixed.

I carried a distraught girl into my home and got ready to have a long discussion with my son.

Virg was actually asleep by the time I got her settled comfortably in my bed. She whimpered a bit as I started to leave, however, and I dug out a piece of chalk from my pocket. Sketching a circle around the bed – and her – I did the same thing I had done to Murph years ago.

I let her actually sleep.

She settled peacefully after that and I sighed before leaving the room.

Nick was sitting on the couch when I closed the door behind me, Mister flopped out on the couch beside him. My son's spidery fingers shook as they ran through the cat's fur.

Slowly I walked over and sat down in a chair across from him, leaning forward with my elbows propped on my knees and my hands clasped in front of my mouth. Nick seemed to ignore me being there for a moment then he closed his eyes as if in pain.

"Was it necessary to be so…" He trailed off as he failed to find the word.

"Brutal?" I suggested.

"Yeah."

I sighed at that. Kid still had a lot of things to learn.

"Grasshopper…as much as that looked like a person, it wasn't. It was a White Court vampire and…"

"Uncle Thomas is one of those," he whispered.

"Your uncle is an exception to the rule. He doesn't feed on people so much that he kills them or torments them. Others of the White Court aren't so generous."

I frowned and closed my eyes, trying to find something to say.

"I grew up a lot different than you have, grasshopper. Nothing so solid and complete or kind as what you've grown up with. I've never tried to make you something you're not or use you. And you've never been thrust headfirst into a war where you had to change every tactic you ever had just to survive at times."

"You have also not lost everything that I had," I continued, looking at him. "Why do you think I want you to be so careful? I've lost too many people, your mother just being the most recent of them. I don't want to lose you too."

Nick gingerly touched his throat, where the bruises from the vampire's fingers stood out sharply. "He was going to kill me," he breathed.

"Yes," I replied. Sighing, I got up and moved to sit beside him on the couch. "If I can stop something, I do in whatever way possibly. Most times it's not like that today." I gently touched his cheek and turned his face towards me so I could look at him squarely. "Its when it is my family in danger that I lose all sanity, grasshopper. Or when a monster like that does those horrible things to a child. Do you understand?"

"No," he breathed, tears in his eyes.

I sighed then looked at him sharply as he kept speaking.

"But…but I guess it doesn't matter. You're supposed to protect me. And we all lose our heads sometimes."

"That we do," I said, smiling slightly. He tried to smile back but couldn't quite manage it.

Well, at least he wasn't hiding in terror from me.

Squeezing his shoulder, I said, "Go get some sleep. I think we could all use some."

Nick nodded and rose from the couch, giving Mister one farewell pat. As he lifted up the door into the sub basement, he turned back towards me with a frown. "Dad?"

"Mmm?" I replied, looking at him curiously.

He bit his lip then said, "Thanks. For being able to do what you do."

Then he disappeared down into his room, leaving me no time to respond. Sighing, I sank back onto the couch and looked at Mister, who was standing and staring at me now.

"What about you?" I asked the cat. "You think what I did was right?"

Mister blinked then sniffed and started cleaning his whiskers in response. I sighed and grumbled, "Lot of help you are."

Closing my eyes as I sat there, I wondered what would happen next.

I had a traumatized girl sleeping in my bed, not going to wake up for two days if I let the spell run its circuit on her.

And my son…I was confused now as to what to do about him. First he'd seemed afraid of me because of what he'd done. But with his last comment before he'd gone downstairs…

"I just don't know," I muttered aloud.

Mister sniffed and climbed into my lap at that, purring like an engine as I rubbed his ears.

_What do I do now?_

_Sleep_, replied the voice in my head.

Sighing, I leaned my head back against the couch and closed my eye. Worrying about it right now wasn't going to fix anything. So I did what my friendly neighborhood fallen angel had suggested.

I slept on it.


	14. Recovery

**Title:** Recovery  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for...nothing.  
**POV:** Harry Blackstone Copperfield Dresden  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse, AU after _Proven Guilty_...sequel to _Move Forward, Come Together, Breakdown, Beautiful Day, Tread Lightly, Web Weaving, Life Refreshed, Soul Repair, Loss of Faith, Faerie Fire, Life Anew, Secrets,_ and _My Defending Angel_.  
**Summary:** Humanity is flexible; they can recover from almost anything given time. Just time...and shoulders to lean on.

* * *

I was in the lab watching Nick listen to Bob go on about a potion when my brother came and tapped me on the shoulder. Turning to look at him, I asked softly, "How is she?" 

He sighed and I knew that was a bad sign.

Four days ago we had rescued my son's best friend from a White Court vampire like my brother, the son of one of his sister's. He had been tormenting the poor girl, aiming to use her until she died from the trauma, and I had seen part of what he'd done to her. The vampire hadn't gotten any mercy from me after that.

Virg had woken up two days ago and hadn't moved from where I'd put her in my bed since. I'd called my brother to come and try to talk to her, to judge just how bad off she was.

Sighing, I asked, "How bad?"

"He did a real number on her, Harry," replied Thomas softly so Nick wouldn't hear. "If she's lucky, she'll be able to live normally in a year or so."

"If she's _lucky_?"

"She barely talked to me. Either she's scared of males in general now, which will make life very unpleasant for her, or scared of people in general. Or she can sense me."

I snorted softly at that.

"If she could sense you, Thomas, she'd be running as far away from you as she could get because of what that bastard did to her," I pointed out.

"Good point."

We stood there in silence, Bob's droning voice and the scratch of Nick's pencil the only sounds for a moment. Then I looked at him and asked, "What do I do with her?"

Thomas sighed and rubbed the back of his neck before replying, "Call her parents for one thing. Let them know where she's at. Then…then I'd say just be patient with her."

"You're saying she needs to stay here?"

"What he did to her is going to make her a target for any White Court that wants someone they can break in easily," he said in a slightly cold voice. "She needs someone that can help her through this and protect her; both of which you can do. And her best friend is here, which should help matters further."

"True."

He clapped my shoulder and said, "I'm heading out then. Have to get to work."

I nodded and listened to his footsteps as he left, hearing the heavy thump of the door as he tugged it shut behind him. Then I tugged my stool towards me and sat on it, trying to figure out just what I was going to say to Virg's parents.

Turned out I didn't really need to worry.

They are, by far, the most laid back people I have ever spoken to. Talking to them was kind of creepy.

In a normal kind of way.

They were perfectly fine about their daughter staying with a man they didn't know and his son, trusting my word that said son actually existed and was her best friend. And they asked for my address so they could send money.

Hells bells.

Crazy or especially trusting; either could describe them.

Whichever way, Virg was staying with us until she recovered. _If_ she recovered according to my brother.

I love the lack of knowing.

As I was talking with them on the phone, I noticed Nick slipping into my bedroom. When he came back out a moment later with his face drawn and pale and went immediately down into his room I sighed.

Damnit.

After hanging up the phone, I went down after him and paused halfway down the steps as I saw him sprawled across his bed with his shoulders shaking. Moving on down the steps, I walked over and sank down on the edge of the bed.

He never noticed me until I laid my hand on his back.

"Grasshopper."

Nick sniffed and lifted his head, saying softly, "I can't help her."

"Shush," I said. "You can only rarely ever help someone alone. We can do it together though…but you have to remember something when you're trying to help someone."

"What?" he sniffed, wiping a hand across his face.

"_They_ have to want to help themselves. Otherwise everything you do is worth nothing."

He sniffed again and sat up, making me move back so he wouldn't bash his head on my chin. Wiping away his tears, he looked up at me and sighed.

"Can we really help her, Dad?"

I smiled and leaned over, placing both hands on his shoulders. Looking squarely at his face but not into his eyes, I said, "We are going to do our best."

He frowned then breathed, "That's all we can do, isn't it?"

"It's all we can ever do."

Nick sighed at that and I squeezed his shoulders before letting go, turning to go back upstairs. As I started up, I asked, "How's stew for dinner?"

"Only if you let me cook it," he replied. A small grin crept onto his face as he said, "You always end up burning it."

"Alright then, oh culinary guru. Come up here and show this unworthy person how to cook stew."

"Holy jealous sarcasm, Batman," quipped Nick as he climbed up after me. I scruffed him as he passed me and tried to pull him into a headlock, which he ducked out of with a grin and sauntered on into the kitchen.

"Watch it, grasshopper," I said, waving a finger at his back. "My sarcasm can eat your sarcasm for breakfast."

"My sarcasm quivers in terror."

Sighing, I looked at Mouse, who had wandered up to me with his tongue lolling out, and asked, "What happened to respect for your parents?"

My dog just gave me a doggy grin and I shook my head before sinking down to rub his ears. Nick smiled at me from the kitchen as he hauled out a pot and got to work.

"It went out the window with the teenage sense of fashion."

"Now that I can agree with," I said before moving to grab a Coke. Then the two of us got down to cooking, him doing most of it. I did all the grunt work with the chopping and stuff.

When it was done, I fixed an extra bowl and very slowly took it into my dark bedroom. Sitting it down on the bedside table, I said softly, "We made stew. I promise its safe to consume."

Virg's curled up form shifted slightly and I resisted the urge to reach out and pat her shoulder.

"And you're safe here, Virg."

Turning, I started towards the door and headed back towards my own food. Just before I closed it behind me I heard her speak softly.

"Mister Dresden."

Blinking, I leaned back in and looked at her. She was still lying down, limbs all curled inward, but she was at least speaking.

"Thank you."

"Its nothing," I said gently and closed the door. I stood there for a moment, head bowed, and thought, _And don't thank me yet. You're far from recovered._

As I turned back and moved to sit down next to Nick on the couch and eat, my personal tag-a-long spoke up.

_She's recoverable._

_Good_, I replied. _Any suggestions for how to do as such?_

_Be patient_, replied Lasciel. _And gentle._

_I already knew those._

_Then no. No suggestions._

Sighing, I said, _Well you're a big help._

She just laughed in response then left me to enjoy dinner and idle conversation with my son. Hopefully though, she could see something we couldn't.

Having lived since the beginning of time kinda gives you an advantage on other people.

And if she didn't come up with anything, I could.

I could figure out some way to make things better over time.

So days passed.

Then weeks.

Then months.

Then a year.

An entire year with us and Virg had gotten somewhat better. She was still shaky and jumped at the slightest things but she could withstand touch now. During those first few weeks when we finally got her out of the bed when we were around she couldn't stand to be touched. Not even by Nick.

She still can't stand much touch though. Just a few careful and short embraces of hands are all she can take.

Now she sat on the floor by the fireplace with Mouse sprawled next to her. One hand rubbed at the big dog's belly as she read through one of my battered old paperbacks. Nick lounged on the couch, sifting through his notes on potions, and his gaze kept flicking towards her.

And me?

I was on the phone giving my daughter pointers about how to deal with a sick three-year-old and not pull her hair out. Or murder her husband.

As I talked, I watched Nick slowly rise and move from the couch. He settled on the floor next to Virg, she not noticing him at all, and slide his arm very carefully around her shoulders. She stiffened at the contact and turned to look at him, her eyes wide.

Then she relaxed and leaned against him, her head falling to his shoulder. Nick grinned and picked up his notes again as she went back to her book.

A little more progress.

As I continued talking to Liz, I watched the pair of them sitting there on the floor in companionable silence.

And I knew everything was going to be alright again.


	15. Descent

**Title:** Descent  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for...some swearing, someone nearly getting brain with a bat, and a bit of brooding.  
**POV:** Nicolas "Nick" Dresden  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse, AU after _Proven Guilty_...sequel to _Recovery, Move Forward, Come Together, Breakdown, Beautiful Day, Tread Lightly, Web Weaving, Life Refreshed, Soul Repair, Loss of Faith, Faerie Fire, Life Anew, Secrets,_ and _My Defending Angel_.  
**Summary:** Fighting the good fight can be a pain sometimes. Especially when you have things that you can't let get out unless you want to die a messy death.

* * *

"Virg, duck!" 

The rainbow-haired woman dropped and a huge claw made of branches swept through the spot where her head had been. She rolled out of the way, losing the sword in her hand along the way, and came up cursing. I charged past her with my rowan wand in hand, funneling power into it as I howled, "_VERAS!_"

A fireball the size of a soccer ball roared forth and hit the golem in the chest. Bits of its branch and leaf body caught fire and it roared in rage, fixing its cold green eyes on me.

"Wizardling," it hissed in a voice that rustled like the wind through leaves.

"That's full fledged wizard to you!" I snapped back. Reaching to the messenger bag hanging at my hip, I drew out a five-foot length of rope as I tucked my wand inside. Grasping the rope with both hands, I swung it a few times then started to spin the weighted end of it in a wide circle. Focusing, I channeled power into the rope, enlivening the careful enchantments I'd placed on it. The rope shimmered then burst into flame, twisting into a fiery whip that lashed around like a snake as I hissed, "_Veras, veras din!_"

The golem roared again and charged at me, huge arms extended above its head. I grinned and flung the rope at it with a hiss, stepping backwards out of its path as I let go. The rope lashed out and whipped around the golem's torso, binding tightly around it and setting more of it on fire. It bellowed angrily and stumbled towards me, lashing out with a huge arm. I flung up my right arm in response, focusing on the silver band about my wrist and brought my shield up in response.

The strike threw me off my feet and shattered the brittle shield I'd called up. Luckily it just sent me rolling across the pavement and not flying through the air as the shield had taken the brunt of things. I heard it roar and start after me but was happy to look up and see it stumble and fall. Virg darted past me then and snatched her sword from the ground, rushing at the fallen monster with an Amazonian howl. She leapt to its shoulder and started hacking viciously at the thick branches that made up its neck.

"Puny mortals!" roared the golem as it got back to its feet. Virg staggered then flung herself low and grabbed onto one of the branches, clinging to the things back like a leech. She kept right on hacking after a moment and the golem bellowed, "I'll crush you both!"

I staggered back to my feet, shaking my head to stop the ringing. Then I ripped my sword from its sheath and charged at the golem's legs – I couldn't risk anything else with Virg clinging to it. It flung an arm at me but I rolled out of the way and came back up to slash at one of its thick legs. Three branches snapped and it staggered before roaring and swinging at me again.

As I flew through the air again, my shield shattered for a second time, I heard Virg scream that Amazon howl again. Then she was screaming, "Shield! _Now!_" and dropping next to me sans her sword. I sat up weakly and focused, drawing the shield around us in careful, flexible layers – I had the time now to manage it. The effort made me see stars and I hope whatever Virg had used would be going off soon.

The golem exploded a moment later, sending pavement and branches flying like missiles. I managed to hold the shield through the storm then released the energy, collapsing in an exhausted heap immediately. Virg leaned over me worriedly but relaxed when I smiled at her.

She jabbed me in the arm and jibbed, "Big baby. You need to practice more."

I snorted at that. "When?" I asked, "I spend most of the day doing class work." Slowly pushing myself upright, I looked around at the pretty much demolished parking lot with a groan. "Great. You see my rope anywhere?"

"No. But the cops are going to be coming soon."

"Gee, I wonder why? Could it have been the freaking _grenade_ you threw in the golem?!"

"Hey, it worked, didn't it?" asked Virg as she helped me to my feet and steadied me with an arm around my back. There are few people that can do that since I'm maybe an inch shorter than my dad and she's one of them. Being short and stocky can give an advantage sometimes.

The aikido I begged my sister to start teaching her after her brush with the White Court helps too.

"And your uncle gave me that," she added as she surveyed the destruction. Then she bent and picked up my sword, leaning around to sheath it for me.

"Hells bells, never tell Dad that!"

"Do I look like that much of an idiot? Hey, there's part of your rope."

"Oh great," I groaned as I spotted another piece. "That's five months work down the drain. Bob's going to gripe at me."

Virg sighed and started trudging to where we'd parked the car, dragging me along with her. "At least we're alive," she said cheerfully.

I snorted and dug out the Beetle's keys, handing them to her when she held out her hand. Then I pulled away from her and dragged myself around to the other side of the car to crumple into the passenger seat. As she climbed in and moved the seat up, I extended an arm to say, "Home, James."

"Yeeees, Massster," she hissed mockingly in response and coaxed the old car to life. As we puttered away, the first of the black and white's arrived on scene to figure out why it looked like a tree had exploded in a parking lot.

They'd be trying to work that one out for a while.

As she drove, Virg kept darting glances over at me as I shifted in the passenger seat. "You okay?" she asked softly.

"Just tired," I replied, staring out the window. "I'm not as good at shielding as Dad. It takes a lot."

"He's had more practice."

"Yeah but when the hell do I have time to practice? I have so much class work I'm going rusty except in potions. Those I can make while studying."

Virg shrugged and said, "Drop out. Work with your dad instead of…fuck, I don't even know what your degree is!"

"Criminology," I replied wearily. "I have this weird idea to be a wizard lawyer. Or a cop like Mom."

She blinked then murmured, "You want to try to chance things. In both worlds."

"I'm gonna try." Sighing, I continued, "The Council hasn't updated anything in centuries. And it needs it. 'Cause I know disobeying the Laws is bad but going against it once shouldn't be an immediate death sentence."

"Jesus," breathed Virg. Her hands tightened on the steering wheel and I could understand why. We'd told her that the Council existed and about the Laws but that was it. Dad's disfavor with them, his past, Molly's, and my own screaming's at them during various meetings since being elevated from apprentice we left out. I couldn't bring myself to care anymore though. "That's barbaric."

I snorted and sneered, "Its _tradition_," in a mockery of the Merlin's voice. "This is the way things are done, and have been done, and will be done forever. Unless someone does something."

"Is there nothing that can change now? Nothing your dad can do?"

"Dad's just a Warden – and one only pulled in because he was needed. He does all he can already. Only Senior Council can pull string like that to change things."

"But you think you can?"

"All I can do is try, Virg."

She frowned then turned to look at me as she pulled the Beetle into the gravel parking lot at the apartment. "I'll help. However I can," she said with fire in her eyes.

I smiled and nodded, saying, "I knew you would." Then I climbed out of the car and just barely saw the baseball bat whirring towards my head. Instinct took over and, despite weariness, I ducked and jabbed my arm out at my attacker's torso. My hand, held stiff with the fingers all together, stabbed into his stomach and knocked the air out of him. I think I broke a rib too. He staggered and I kicked at his ankle, snapping bone and making him drop with a squeal of pain, which was echoed a moment later by Virg's Amazon howl. As I picked up the Louisville slugger he'd tried to brain me with and planted a foot in his guts, I glanced over the top of the Beetle. Virg had another thug subdued, her arm wrapped around his throat, and seemed to have that under control.

Applause, slow and even, sounded from nearby and a man with dark hair gone gray stepped out of the shadows near the door.

"Impressive. I didn't think you'd see that coming."

I snorted and smacked the bat into one hand as I pressed my foot down harder on the thug. His already broken rib cracked and the guy decided not moving was the better way to survive.

Virg blinked at the man and snarled, "Who the fuck are you and what the hell was this?!"

The man smiled, all fatherly and kind, and looked at me with feral eyes. "You know don't you, Nicolas?"

My eyes narrowed at that. No one but my mother had ever and ever would have permission to call me by my first name.

"Its Dresden to you," I hissed. Then I added, "Virg, meet Gentleman Johnnie Marcone. And you can call her Miss Wakefield. Now what the hell is this all about?"

Marcone just smiled and replied, "I find myself lacking on the magical side of things."

"And you think Nick is gonna work for you?!" exploded Virg. "Fuck that shit! He…" I held up a hand to cut her off and she snarled, "You're not seriously thinking about doing this, are you?!"

"Of course he is. After all…he's been living alone since he graduated from high school."

My hand convulsed on the slugger and I hissed, "How do you know that?"

"I make it my business to know things," replied Marcone. "And I know that your dear father had been absent since two days after you graduated. He left you here, telling neither you or your sister a thing."

"Nick," breathed Virg, "Nick, is this _true_?"

I hate it when the shit unexpectedly hit the proverbial fan.

Glaring at the old man with what I hoped was the utmost venom he'd ever seen in someone's gaze, I snarled, "Yeah, so what? I've been covering his cases and no one's noticed the difference."

"Yes but you dropped out of college to cover for him."

"I'm going back once I get money to live on," I snapped, ignoring Virg's disbelieving look. "And I won't take you offer – I like my money without blood on it. Now get the fuck away from my home."

Marcone sighed and said, "You're as much a fool as he is."

"Better a fool than a criminal," I shot back at him. He gave me a fatherly smile and I resisted the urge to smash his face in with the slugger in my hands.

"My offer will remain open for some time. I hope you'll reconsider."

"I won't." Lifting my foot, I kicked the thug in the kidneys and he grunted before rolling away. "Now that your minions and go," I snarled, nodding at Virg over the car. She released the other thug and shoved him away from her, a venomous look on her face. The two slinked back over to their master, who nodded briefly at me and smiled again before turning to walk away.

As they vanished towards a dark car parked down the street, Virg came around the Beetle and slammed me back against the passenger door.

"What the _fuck_ is going on? How did you get mixed up with the mob? And the hell didn't you _tell me_?!"

"Can we do inside and talk about this?" I asked softly, nonplussed. "I think my family problems have been aired to the world enough tonight."

She glared then hissed, "Fine," as she released me. Her harsh gaze remained on me as I went down the concrete steps and lowered the apartments wards with a muttered word.

It hurt to have her looking at me like that.

She strode right in and sat on the couch, idly patting Mouse as the aging dog padded up to her. I didn't sit down; instead I walked to the icebox and grabbed one of the ale's my dad had kept in there for as long as I could remember. Usually I didn't drink even if I was twenty-one and kept getting them from Mac.

Tonight was the exception.

Walking back, I stood and drank for a moment, gathering my thoughts. Then I sighed and started to speak.

"Dad got entangled with Marcone years ago. Busted down the door of his club before he took down a sorcerer, which started rumors that he'd pulled a hit for Marcone. And that's that. Dad's asked him for his help, helped him, and fought against him periodically since then. He's a devil but he's the devil we know."

Virg nodded and asked, "What about your dad?"

"I don't know," I replied. "He didn't tell me anything; just up and left. The Council, me, Liz, and Uncle Thomas were the only one's that even knew he was even gone until now."

"_Why?_"

"Do you know how many enemies my dad has? If they all knew he wasn't here, they'd come after Liz and me and probably kill us. And they'd take James and turn him into something horrible."

Virg frowned and breathed, "You could do a thing about it, could you?"

I shook my head slowly and took a harsh swing of the ale, wanting suddenly to get very drunk. "No," I replied stonily. "I'm in the same weight class as Dad magically but I don't have the skill to duke it out with the things he's pissed off. And Liz has the skill but not the raw power. There's no one nearby that could help us in time if something came after us. So we tried to keep it quiet."

She stared for a long moment then sprang to her feet, rushing over to hug me tightly. "I'm sorry," she whispered. I gently patted her back and breathed, "I know."

After a moment she asked, "What now?"

"Now?" I replied. "Now I want to get very drunk then go to sleep."

"Nick…that's not going to help any."

"I know. But it'll stop me from thinking for a few hours."

She just gave me a sad look for a moment then went to the icebox and pulled out two more bottles. As she walked back and handed me one, she said, "You're a noble idiot. But you're _my_ noble idiot."

"Thanks," I said. "I think."

Virg smiled and reached up to touch my cheek, trying to meet my eyes. I focused on her mouth and didn't move my gaze from there – a soulgaze wasn't anything I wanted in the state I was in.

"No more secrets?"

"No more secrets."

"And I'm free to help you out?"

"Wha…Virg, no…"

"Uh-uh, no," she said with a shake of her head. "I've got money to spare and you know it. And you need help handling your dad's cases? I'm your new help with no need for paying except that you take my damn money."

"Your parents money," I pointed out.

She sighed at that. "Better theirs than Marcone's."

Ouch.

"Okay, okay," I said. "You've got a deal."

She smiled and clinked her bottle against mine before tossing half of it back. "That's that then."

I nodded then we both sat on the couch, me drinking myself numb and her watching me with a look that was half pity, half worry. When I wanted to care, I just drank faster.

As the alcohol sank into my system, it turned me into a babbling madman. I don't know what I told Virg but I ended up lying curled up on the couch with my head in her lap, her fingers running through my hair, and her tears dripping onto my face. And I couldn't bring myself to care.

I hadn't seen my sister, brother-in-law, or nephew in a year and a half. Liz was just too scared of what might happen if she was seen near Dad's apartment or me. I look and act too much like him for my own good and can be mistaken for him well enough that I can run his cases. She called and that helped a little. But it wasn't the same.

My mother was years dead and I had no comfort from there. I couldn't even bring myself to visit her grave.

My father had vanished without a trace, leaving me alone. With bills, his cases, college, and wizarding, I was barely surviving. What money he'd left hadn't lasted through the first three months.

My uncle popped in on occasion but those were spare moments and never long. He'd offered to help me with money but I'd refused it.

Mom's family…I didn't have the heart to call Grandma and tell her Dad had left me alone. She was having health problems as was and I wanted to keep her around for as long as I could.

Everyone else I had was either gone or going.

Except Virg. She was here, with me, and over and over I heard her whisper that. And that she wasn't going to leave me.

I wrapped my arms around her knees and closed my eyes wearily. Because I knew that couldn't be.

Virg was human and I was a wizard.

Just like Mom and Dad.

Sooner or later, something would happen to her. And it would leave me with nothing but Bob so long as my dad stayed hidden away.

Then…then I don't know what I'd do.

I don't want to be alone.


	16. The Thing I Hate

**Title:** The Thing I Hate  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for...swearing, annoyed people, and fire.  
**POV:** Nicolas "Nick" Dresden  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse, AU after _Proven Guilty_...sequel to _Descent, Recovery, Move Forward, Come Together, Breakdown, Beautiful Day, Tread Lightly, Web Weaving, Life Refreshed, Soul Repair, Loss of Faith, Faerie Fire, Life Anew, Secrets,_ and _My Defending Angel_.  
**Summary:** There are things you like. There are things you love. There are things you dislike. And there are things you hate. This story is about those last ones.

* * *

I hate Council meetings.

Though thank God I've convinced them to stop having the damn meetings in Latin. Or, I should say, I convinced them through Ebenezar and his allies on the Senior Council.

But, yes, I hate the meetings.

And this one doesn't look like it's going to be much happier since Virg insisted on coming despite me telling her every time they wouldn't allow it. I was shocked senseless when the two Wardens guarding the door let us in without a word. And she smirked at me like it was a good thing.

Turns out they _wanted_ her there.

"So," sneered the Merlin as we entered the building, me wearing the ever required robes open over my jeans and Led Zeppelin shirt, she with her rainbow-dyed hair alongside dark Capri's and a blue tie-dyed cut-off shirt. "This is your infamous 'help'."

Virg arched an eyebrow and said, "Infamous? Wow, I feel special."

"Virg," I growled warningly. She glared back at me but fell silent, standing next to me with her arms crossed over her chest.

The Merlin sniffed then looked at me with the words, "We are to speak about this, boy."

I bristled at the name then snarled, "You brought the _entire_ Council here to bitch at me for letting someone help me?"

"She is _human_, boy," said Ancient Mai. "What can she do?"

"A damn lot!" I snapped. Taking a step away, I threw one hand towards Virg and growled, "She has saved my ass enough times for me to trust her with my life. Magic she may not have, but she's brave and determined to help me. _That_, dear Seniors, is what matters in the fight. I don't need her to have magic to help me out – just to be there and to know that she's got my back when I need it."

"What?" sneered LaFortier. "As your mother helped your father so well?"

I saw red then, anger rushing hot as suddenly as a flash flood, and brought together enough power to render him to ash. Virg's hand gripped my shoulder then – she'd gotten good at sensing when I'm about to rage – and her fingers pressed down hard. The pain was enough to bring me back to my senses.

Thank God for her being there.

LaFortier seemed to realize his mistake as I fixed a venomous stare on him. I'd been willing before to forgive and forget his disgust for my family. Never again now.

"You aren't worthy of even _thinking_ about my mother," I snarled, all venom and rage. The press of Virg's fingers cooled my head and I hissed in response, letting her know I was hurting and understood her all at once. She stopped pressing her fingers into my shoulder but didn't move her hand.

Glaring briefly at LaFortier again, I then snorted, "Now that we've cleared that up…what did this meeting actually get called for? 'Cause I know it's not just for you all to bitch at me."

"Ah, yes," said a deep, rich voice. The hooded form of the Gatekeeper rose and continued, "We have received dire news from Wardens stationed in South America."

Soft murmurs stared then stilled at a twitch of his cowled head.

"It seems…it seems that the Red Court are determined to go to war with us again."

The older wizards, the one's who had survived the first war, began muttering loudly now and I felt none too few gazes twitch towards me. I clenched my jaw in response and stared at the Gatekeeper, not moving my eyes from him. His cowl dipped towards me then he added, "And it seems one of our own has been taken captive by them."

No.

Dear God and Hell's bells _no_.

Please.

Not that.

I saw the gleam of eyes underneath the cowl and then the Gatekeeper bowed towards me with the muttered of, "My sincerest condolences."

_No._

"Nick," hissed Virg, gently pressing on my shoulder. "Nick, we'll get him back."

"There will be nothing of the sort," boomed the Merlin. "Most particularly not by the pair of you!"

"_What?!_" She spun and exclaimed, "But you can't just…"

"This is but the first casualty of war." His eyes caught mine and he added, "Fitting that it would be the one that started it in the first place."

I bit my lip and closed my eyes tight, grabbing Virg's shoulder tightly as I fought down the rage the rose up in response to that. Her hand fumbled over mine and squeezed back despite the fact that I knew I was hurting her. She took it, a stalwart stone upon which I could lean and regain my equilibrium.

"Damn you," I hissed when I was able, my voice tight and raw with pain and rage. Chairs shifted uneasily around us and I think none too few got up and move back. Lifting my head, I stared past them all to the Merlin, who was caught somewhere between a sneer and a mask of fear. "_DAMN YOU!_"

Virg's rainbow hair flicked out of the corner of my eyes and I turned my gaze to her. She stared back at me, a fire just as venomous as mine raging in her eyes.

It was because of her being there that I didn't just start pulling in power and burn the lot of the bastards.

"Nick," she breathed, carefully reaching up to touch my face. I pressed my cheek into her hand and closed my eyes, trying to force myself to calm down.

"Get me out of here," I growled to her. "Get me out of here before I kill someone."

She just nodded and I felt her hands grip mine, strong and sturdy as the rest of her. I followed her blindly, trusting her to lead me.

When I felt a cool breeze on my face, I broke away from her, stumbling slightly. Her hands fell on me again and I flung myself away with a scream of "_Don't touch me!_" She gasped but stayed as I staggered away from her, collapsing into the grassy area that surrounded the old barn the meeting had been arranged in.

The rage I felt at the Merlin and them all swelled up in wild flames then and I screamed into the rain-damp earth. With a shudder and a wrenching of my body backwards, I howled my fury at the sky.

And every shred of magic I'd unconsciously gathered was released in one huge and furious storm.

When I opened my eyes, there was a swath of fire scorched earth around me in a ten-foot radius where I lay on my back, breathing like I'd just run a marathon. Virg collapsed next to me, kicking up ashes, and grabbed the collar of my shirt to shake me.

"Damnit, Nick, don't do that! I thought you'd just _killed_ yourself!"

I winced when I saw the tears in my friend's eyes and reached for her closest hand, gripping it tightly.

"I'm not going anywhere," I croaked, my voice raw.

"You're going back to training if you're doing anything," said a voice I knew from nearby. I lifted my head and smiled at Morgan, who just sniffed and glowered at me.

He's actually a good guy, I've discovered; taught me a bit about combat magic in the past few years. And he confessed that he knew my dad was a good guy too.

Morgan frowned and stepped forward into the brunt area, kicking up ashes with ever step. When he stopped, the toes of his boots touched the soles of my sneakers and he said sternly, "If you end up like this whenever something angers you, you'll be dead in hours."

"What does it matter?" I hissed, managing to shove myself up onto one elbow. "I can't do shit. You can't do shit. No one can do a damned thing because everyone in there hates Dad no matter all the good he's done!"

"Has it ever occurred to you that there is a good reason why?"

"Yeah. They're fuckin assholes."

Virg snorted in laughter at that but Morgan just glowered. He then leaned down and said, "No, boy. You were young when it happened, but I would still expect you to remember it."

I stared at him for a moment, confused, and started, "I don't kno…"

Then I remembered.

"Coins," I whispered, remembering a tarnished silver coin a man had shown Lizzy and I after he'd kidnapped us. I'd been too young to understand what exactly was going on then. She had known, though.

"A Denarius," sneered Morgan. "Holder of a Fallen Angel and a cursed object is there ever were any. Your father holds the last of the coins and it is a known fact to all within the Council."

"And that's why they won't go help him?!" I exploded, struggling to my feet. I nearly fell but Virg caught me and hefted me upright so I could glower down at Morgan. "That's bullshit!"

"He made a deal with the devil, boy!"

"_TO SAVE ME AND MY SISTER!_"

Morgan growled and spat, "The 'why' doesn't matter. He still _has_ it. He hasn't let it go. Without him doing that, the Council will give him no help."

"And how the fuck do you expect him to do that when he's a captive?" sneered Virg.

"I don't."

I screamed in anger from behind my teeth and wished my magical reserves hadn't been spent by my personal firestorm. Morgan's face was a pretty tempting target for some fireball hurling practice right about now.

Then I sighed and said, "This isn't work this shit." I sagged heavily against Virg, who wrapped her arms tightly around my waist, then looked at the Warden. "Damnit, Morgan, he's my _dad_."

Morgan stared at me and softly said, "You do realize that they've probably already turned him. Or worse."

I shuddered at the thought and nodded.

"I know. And he'd want me to do something about it before he hurt someone."

He nodded then drew something from within his coat – a dagger. Leaning forward, he handed it to Virg, who took it as gingerly as if it were a time bomb.

"What's this?" she asked.

"A dagger created near the end of the first war with the Red Court," replied Morgan. "It will kill if you thrust it directly into ones heart." Then he looked at me and hissed, "Be careful, boy. This is dangerous ground upon which you tread. And you'll have no help."

"I wouldn't want help from the Council now if it came in the form of an army," I spat.

He just smiled bitterly then turned and left us alone. Virg looked down at the dagger then breathed, "What if he's right?"

"About what?"

"That they turned your dad."

I sighed and reached for the dagger, drawing it as she held the sheath. Holding it up, I appraised the gleaming black blade and replied coldly, "I'll make them hurt for it. And then…then I won't let him hurt anyone."


	17. Things Crumble

**Title:** Things Crumble  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for...swearing, annoyed people, veiled threats, and some things unexpected.  
**POV:** Nicolas "Nick" Dresden  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse, AU after _Proven Guilty_...all previous in the series found here.  
**Summary:** The world is getting less and less safe. And Nick and Virg are getting ready to go on a rescue mission that could leave the both of them dead for a man that might already be so.

* * *

What do you do when you're about to set off on a journey that could leave you as a corpse?

You call people.

My checklist of people to call was short and I'd already gotten into contact with most everyone that hadn't been at the Council meeting. I'd left a message on Uncle Thomas' answering machine and told Grandma that I'd be out of pocket for a few days. A few other sporadic calls around town and now I was debating over calling my sister.

Its not that I didn't want to.

It just turns out her husband's a dick.

Sighing, I waited for the sound of the shower starting up, signaling Virg was out of hearing. Then I picked up the receiver and dialed my big sister's number.

It rang twice then a voice growled, "I thought I told you not to call here again."

"Ah, invested in caller ID, I see," I quipped quickly. Stupid mouth getting ahead of my brain. Then I coughed and said, "Let me talk to Liz."

"No," stated Paul stubbornly. "She's not getting entangled up in that again."

"Look, I don't have the time for your shit, Paul. I know you think that because our father isn't around to break your kneecaps you can be the bastard you actually are but this isn't the time for it. Right now I need to talk to my sister."

"She is _not_ getting entangled in that again."

Rolling my eyes, I snarled, "Its not my intention to _get_ her entangled in it again, dipshit. Now put her on the phone!"

There was silence then I heard him say, "Liz, phone for you."

"Who is it?" asked Liz then she took the phone herself, saying, "Hello?"

I might've cried right then if I wasn't dog tired from packing, stressing, and putting together last minute enchantments over the past three days. It had been so many months since I'd heard my big sister's voice…

"Its me, Lizzy."

"Oh, Nick! I'm so sorry I haven't called. James…"

"Lizzy," I said softly. "I don't have the time."

Her voice stopped and she breathed, "What's going on?"

"The Council found Dad."

She choked then and I heard her let out a little sob. Then she asked, "What else? God, Nicky, I know there's something else."

I closed my eyes and replied, "Red's. The Red's have him, Lizzy. And they want to start up the old war again."

"Oh God."

"And I'm going after Dad."

She was silent then she breathed, "I'm going with you."

I thought about it for a moment, I really did. Having my sister back by my side and fighting next to her, her magic and mine together…it would be marvelous.

But I couldn't do it. I couldn't let _her_ do it.

"You can't," I hissed. Before she could protest, I continued, "James, Lizzy. Think of him. We could die trying to get Dad back, you know that. And leaving James with your dipshit of a husband would make Mom come back from the grave in revenge."

"Paul is a good father, Nicky."

"But he's not a _good man_."

She was silent at that and I felt like a heel for saying it. But she knew what he was – she lived with the man after all. And she still loved him too much to leave him.

Sighing, she asked, "What do I do then? Just sit here and wait until I have a Warden show up on my doorstep to tell me you're dead? I won't do it, Nicky. _I won't_."

Damnit, Liz, do you think this is what I want? If I could, I'd have you there with me and we'd take down every vampire that stood in our way to get to Dad. But you can't do that. I'm not going to _let _you do that.

I am not going to be the one to deprive my nephew of his mother.

"Please, Lizzy," I breathed. "You can't do anything in this. Just…just lay low. Please."

"Damnit, Nicky."

She then sighed and said, "Alright. Alright. But you take Mouse with you."

"I intend to."

There was an uneasy silence between us for a moment then she choked and started sobbing again. And on the other end of the line I heard James asked, "Mommy? What's wrong?"

Liz sniffed and said, "Your Uncle Nick's going on a trip, baby."

"But why are you crying?"

"Because he might be gone for a long time."

"Oh," said James. "Can I talk to him?"

I blinked, confused by that. I hadn't actually seen James since…Hell's bells since he was four. And the last phone conversation I'd had with him two years ago had been cut off when his ever-loving father had snatched the phone away from him.

"Sure, baby. Is that okay, Nick?" asked Liz. "You're not leaving right now, are you?"

"Tomorrow," I replied. "Virg has a few last minute things to do with finances and stuff. And getting us a vehicle hardier than the Beetle that'll run with me in it."

"Good luck. Here, baby."

The phone switched hands then James cheerfully cried, "Hi, Uncle Nick!"

"Hey, whelp," I responded. "Been a while since we got to talk."

"Mmmhmm. Daddy said I wasn't to talk to you anymore."

That _shit._

"But Mommy's okay with it," he added. "So it's okay, right?"

I couldn't help but smile at that. Talking to James always served to lighten my spirits. "Yeah, it's okay, whelp. So, you're what now, ten, eleven?"

James laughed and replied, "Nine!"

"Nine? Wow, even better. How's school?"

"Great! But I hate math."

I chuckled and said, "Lots of people do, Jamie." And dimly in the background I heard Paul growl, "You let James talk to _him?!_" Liz snarled in response and spat back, "He is his _uncle_, Paul. He has the right to talk to him."

James went abruptly silent then whispered, "Daddy's angry."

"Yeah, I can hear him."

"He doesn't like you. It makes me sad."

I sighed and said, "He's not the only one that doesn't like me, whelp. And since he's making a fuss, I should probably go."

"NO!" exclaimed James. Then he quieted and said, "I'm scared."

"Of what, Jamie?"

"I dunno. Mommy says its nothing and Daddy thinks I'm dreaming things. But…but…"

"What, kiddo?" I asked, pressing gently.

"Something bad," he breathed. "Bad dreams of people doing bad things. And…and…and one's me. I know it."

"Describe some of them for me."

He did and I recognized the descriptions of several things within the dream, even from the way in which he described them.

_Motherfucker._

My temper rose and I bit my tongue hard to have the pain bring me down. Then I said, "Jamie, get your Mom back on the phone. I need to tell her something."

"About the dream?"

"Yeah."

"O-okay."

There was a moment of silence when Liz came back with, "Nick?"

"Y'know that dream Jamie's been having?" I growled.

"Nick, that's just a dream!"

"Did you ask him to describe the shit in it? Damnit, Liz, there's recognizable Summer Court in there as well as Red's and Black's. I know you haven't been in the magic scene for years but you should still remember Dad's descriptions of the big players that are still around and pissed at our family."

"Nick…"

I sighed and spat, "_Someone_ is sending him that shit, Liz. And they're putting him smack dab in the middle of it on the bad side of things." My temper welled up again and I clenched my fist tightly, nails digging into my palms hard enough to draw blood. "Someone is _gunning_ for him."

"Oh God…"

"And I'm leaving tomorrow and can't do shit. Damnit! _Damnit!_"

Liz's voice shook as she asked, "What do I do, Nick?"

"You do what Dad fucking taught us!" I replied angrily. "I don't care what your shit of a husband thinks of it. You threaten his ass and tell him that if you don't do this, Jamie could be in danger."

"And if he doesn't let me?"

"You call Ebenezar and tell him what's going on. He'll come straighten him out and'll stay around to keep an eye out too." Then I lowered my voice and breathed, "And you be careful too, Liz."

"I will," she promised. "You take care of yourself and Virg, okay?"

I smiled at that.

"Virg takes care of _me_, Lizzy."

"Of course, how silly of me," she said, laughing. Then she was quiet again and breathed, "Be safe."

"I will."

She handed the phone back to James then and I said, "Your Mom's going to take care of that dream, kiddo. You just trust her and don't talk to your Dad about it anymore."

"O-okay."

"And I've gotta go now. You take care of your Mom, whelp."

"I will, Uncle Nick," he promised. "Bye."

"Bye, kiddo," I breathed. Then I hung up the phone and buried my head in my hands, shaking with rage and fear.

Someone was gunning for my nephew and I couldn't do shit about it. 'Cause if I didn't go after Dad now, there'd probably be no chance later. They'd see us coming later. Or he'd be dead – or worse – by then.

My family was being threatened from all sides and I could only approach one problem at a time. And, God help me, my Dad was more important than my nephew.

"Nick."

Virg sank down next to me and wrapped an arm around me, hugging tight. Then she said, "You can't do everything, you know."

I chuckled harshly and asked, "How much did you hear?"

"From you getting on the phone with your sister again."

"Ah."

She sighed and said, "Seriously, Nick. You can't deal with every problem that comes along. No matter how much you want to or think the fate of the world rests on your shoulders."

"Well who _else_ is going to do it?" I snarled into my hands. "The Council sit behind their damned wards and _watch_ and most of the rest of the magical community is made up of hedge witches that would be tossed aside by a pixie. I'm all there is!"

I lifted my head to look at her, ready to continue my rant, and was floored by her appearance.

"…is there a reason you're only wearing a towel?"

Virg blinked then looked down before glancing back at me with a coy smile. "You like it?"

What. The. Fuck.

"Um…"

The caveman part of my brain – thoroughly deprived of anything for years thanks to my fear of getting involved with people – started bashing a stick against things and grunting. My dealings with women involved me kissing a girl. Once. That was it.

So…having a half-naked woman sitting next to me was sending him into overdrive and giving me feelings I didn't want.

Not about my best friend.

"Nick," she said softly, "I do love you. I have for a while. And now…now when we're about to do this rescue mission of possible death, it seemed like a good time to tell you."

"In a towel?" I asked, still stunned by this.

"Forget the towel," she snapped without thinking and my brain went ahead of me on that path until I snatched it back. "That came out wrong."

"Yeah. It kinda did. And I'm not doing this, Virg."

"Nick…"

"I am not sleeping with my best friend!" I exclaimed.

She stared at me, rainbow hair dulled by wetness and all flat against her shoulders, then leaned towards me. The hand not holding her towel up grabbed the front of my shirt and she jerked me towards her, an intense look on her face.

Then it happened.

All of the carefully laid plans and efforts cascaded into chaos like dominoes in that moment; she kissed me and I realized that I'd been in love with my best friend for years.

I sat, shocked for a moment, as she pulled away from me. She straightened her towel then asked, "How was that?"

My brain thawed after a moment and the caveman started bashing his stick harder against things, howling like mad. And abruptly I was tugging her back into another kiss, dragging her towards me.

She grunted in surprise then melted, sinking into the kiss as she sidled towards me. The towel got left behind somewhere along the way and as I realized she was sitting in my lap stark naked, I came halfway back to consciousness.

"Hell's bells," I breathed, stunned.

Virg blinked then looked closely at me. After a moment, she murmured, "Jesus. I'm your first."

"Yeah," I replied in a somewhat choked voice.

"You didn't want to pull anyone else into this. Oh, Nick."

She hugged me then started kissing me again, this time slower and infinitely more passionately. I followed her lead and let her go where she wanted, even to dragging me down to lay on the rug in front of the fireplace after shoving the coffee table aside.

Somewhere after that all conscious thought left me and there was just the two of us in that moment.

Afterwards she slid away and tugged a blanket off the back of the couch, coming back to draw it over the two of us. Then she curled back up next to me and poked me in the ribs.

"Not falling asleep on me, are you?"

"Nuh-uh," I replied, though I could feel exhaustion starting to sneak up on me. Then I touched her face gently with one hand and said, "Virg."

"Yeah, Nick?" she replied, looking up.

I just stared at her for a moment then breathed, "I…I think I'm in love with you."

"I _know_ I'm in love with you."

"How?"

"What do you feel?" she asked, touching my chest – my heart. "What do you feel here, hmm?"

"I…" I frowned then replied, "I want to keep you safe. I want…I want you to be here, next to me."

Virg smiled sadly and said, "That's what you've always wanted, Nick."

Shaking my head, I touched a series of scars that ran along her abdomen, a remnant of her time as the thrall of a White Court vampire. He had been trying to mark her as his – but my dad had killed him for what he'd done to her.

I shook with rage at the memory and that I had been unable to do anything against that vampire at the time.

That I hadn't been able to be the one to save her.

"I want to kill everything that's hurt you," I hissed, running my fingers over the scars. "And I want to make this mark – this claim on you – go away. I…I want to scream at the sky and say this woman is mine and anyone that touches her wrongly will answer to me."

Virg smiled at that, shock in her eyes, then kissed me gently.

"You erased any other claim on me an hour ago, Nick. I love you, idiot. Don't forget that."

I sighed and leaned my head against hers, closing my eyes wearily.

"Love you too. Sleep now."

She laughed lightly at that and said, "I can't disagree with that idea." Underneath the blanket, she cuddled up next to me and we slept at peace for that one night.

We both knew that in the morning that peace would be no more.

And that one, or both, of us might not be coming back from this rescue mission.


	18. From the Abyss, a side story

**Title:** From the Abyss  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for...Harry being jumped by Red Court vamps. Again.  
**POV:** Harry Blackstone Copperfield Dresden  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse, AU after _Proven Guilty_  
**Summary:** A few words from Harry as he waits amongst the hospitality of the Red Court and hopes for rescue.

* * *

Torment.

Can you imagine it? Torment with every waking moment and breath? And nightmares later where there is only more of such?

Can you?

If you can…you only have a fraction of my pain.

Also, if you can imagine that and _aren't_ the prisoner of a bunch of vampire's that hate you more than words can express, you need help more than I do.

Most of my moments are spent worrying about my family. Is my brother still alright? How is my son coping with me leaving him with no warning? How is my daughter coping with the world? Does my grandson even remember me now – or am I only a figure his mother speaks fondly of?

The rest…the rest of the time is spent between real and imagined nightmares. My dear hosts have a fiery hatred for me as they hold me responsible for the deaths of two high-ranking members of their number and a dozen others. I'll claim one of the pair and the dozen. The other one is Ebenezar's to claim and justly so.

Not anyone can pull down an old Soviet satellite from orbit onto a vampire's head.

So my hosts come and they do…well they do that thing they do. It's the same with all of the Red Court. Worse if they hate you as much as they hate me.

That's the real nightmare. Everything else is imagined in my dreams.

And between all of these torments in one little portion of time…I want to die. I just want someone to come and put me out of my misery. My kids and grandson might be sake then, without my life hanging over them. And I could see Murph again.

But I know I can't give up that easily.

If it weren't for the damn thorn manacles and the fact that they took the coin, I could have broken out of here the moment they threw me in. Instead I have to sit here and be tormented by them and myself plus Lash.

It doesn't help at all that they left me naked. And this time not with a convenient pile of clothes lying nearby.

Levering myself to my feet, I slowly making my way across the concrete floor to the high barred window. There's a shift in my head as I stare up at the late afternoon sky then Lash grumbles, _You should have swallowed the coin_.

"And risk being taken over by you when the opportunity please you?" I replied aloud. So what if the Red's heard me and thought I was crazy? Better to be a crazy man than a broken one. "No thanks, Lash."

_Have we not covered this before, Harry? I have told you that I have no such wish to take your body._

"Not now. But you could. I've still got a long life ahead of me."

_Not if you die here._

Okay, she has a point there.

"And a side shot from the peanut gallery," I quipped. "Though what use is this argument now? We're trapped and coinless. Kinda defeats the purpose of the discussion."

_Arguing with you is better than arguing with your subconscious._

"Aw, I thought you two got along."

She snorted at that. _He's become less agreeable in your old age._

I sniffed and that and purposefully ignored the gray hair that hung over my eyes amongst the dark. That's stress there, not age. Well…mostly.

"I'm not even middle-aged in wizard years, thank you very much."

_Yet still a whelp in my eyes_, shot Lash with some humor in her voice.

"Touché, oh Miss Intangible."

She just laughed at that then sobered as she said, _Sunset. One will come soon._

I closed my eyes then so neither of us could see the sun going down and sighed. The Red's always started coming at sunset to begin their torment of me. One came at first then another and another and another until there were at most seven there, all of them pawing at me. Lash blocked what she could but there was only so much that she was capable of without overloading parts of my brain.

"I know," I said softly.

There was silence for a moment then she said, _I fear they will not come for you, Harry. Not your precious Council._

"If they know where I am, Nick will. Even if I don't want him to, he will."

_How do you know?_

"Because he's my son, Lash. He's me in so many ways it hurts because I know how hard life is going to be on him.

_And you know he will come?_

"I'd come if it were him."

The heavy steel door opened behind me and I heard not one but two people enter. Shit. They were starting the festivities earlier than usual.

"Hello, wizard," one hissed, their flesh mask already half off. I didn't try to remember their faces. I didn't want to.

Slowly I turned and looked at them, glowering in fully wizardly grumpiness.

"Hello, vampire," I replied.

It hissed and then both of them were rushing at me, one throwing me against the wall whilst the other cackled and started to lick my chest. As the venom started to sink in, I hissed, _Lash._

Everything dimmed abruptly and I was in my head, sitting in that circle with my subconscious and her human form. Subconscious me snorted and said, "Back again? Can't take the heat?"

Lash arched a blond eyebrow haughtily and sneered, "If you care to see how long you last under their onslaught, I would be happy to allow you to switch places for a moment."

"No thanks. I'd rather sulk here."

She sniffed then looked at me as I grimaced and curled up into a ball. In here I could feel less of what they were doing to me…but some of it still leaked through. And she wouldn't do the sleep thing to be again. Not after how I'd hidden then and almost not returned.

As I shook and shivered, trying not to think about what they were doing to my body, she crouched next to me. When I looked up at her, I saw a sympathetic look on her face and noticed that she looked about as horrible as I felt with her usually immaculate robe in tatters and her blond hair matted and dank.

I was shocked when she wrapped her arms around me and almost pulled away from her. Then all of the pain and torment from the vampire's came back and I sank against her with a whimper. In this moment I'd take what comfort I could.

And really…I wanted someone to hold me again.

"We will make it through this, Harry," she hissed in my ear. "I know you do not trust me, but I _am_ loyal to you. You are all I have left."

_Its not a matter of trusting you, Lash_, I thought as I started to slip into unconsciousness. _It's a matter of me trusting me not to go mad with power._

Then I was blessedly unconscious, with one me lying limp in a fallen angel's ethereal arms and the other tortured by the hands of creatures from a nightmare.

Lasciel looked down at Harry as he lay in her arms then looked at his subconscious, who shrugged and glared at the darkness around them.

"All we can do now," he said softly, "is hope that boy makes it."


	19. Ring Around the Rosies

**Title:** Ring Around the Rosies  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for...nothing.  
**POV:** Nicolas "Nick" Dresden  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse, AU after _Proven Guilty_.  
**Summary:** Leaving what you know is hard. Leaving what you know to go do something that could kill you...that's even harder.

* * *

"We got everything?" I asked as I threw the last bag into the back of the older model Jeep Virg had managed to acquire. Or, more I should say had snitched from her parent's garage. They wouldn't miss it, as it hadn't been driven since she took it joy riding once when she was fifteen. 

"Think so," she replied, tucking a thick envelope into the back pocket of her low-rise jeans. "Got money, vehicle, weapons, and magic gear. Yeah, we're good."

I grinned and walked up behind her, wrapping my arms around her waist in a warm hug. "Then let's get moving," I said in a low voice as I kissed her cheek.

Virg laughed and turned in my grasp, nuzzling her nose against my chin.

"Watch it, mister. Else I might have to drag you inside and delay this rescue for an hour."

"Tempting but we do need to leave now."

"Not just yet," said a familiar voice from the other side of the Jeep and I spun around to stare through it in shock.

"Carlos! Molly!"

"Hi, Nicky," said Molly, coming around the Jeep to hug me briefly. Then she gasped as she really looked at me and breathed, "You look more and more like him every day, I swear."

I smiled sheepishly and ran a hand through my hair, shrugging slightly. "Not my fault."

"Yes, we know," said Carlos as he came to stand next to his wife, one arm slung across her shoulders. They didn't look any different from when I'd last really seen them two years ago – I hadn't had time to make small talk with them at the Council meeting and see them. A few new lines here and there and the random new scar was it. I figured there'd be more difference than that but my dad never changed much in my memory until Mom died. It's only since then that he's really started to look more of his age (which I _do_ remember even if he chooses not to).

I chuckled then asked, "What are you two doing here? The Council doesn't…"

"The Council doesn't know about your little escapade," said Molly reassuringly. "Morgan told Carlos and suggested that we give you a hand."

"But not in so many words," added Carlos with a grin.

"_Morgan?!_"

Molly chuckled and said, "Yeah, I think he's gotten soft of late. And we _are_ coming with you two. There _is_ no saying 'no,' you hear me?"

I wilted back under the glare she shot at me, feeling like I was dealing with Momma Charity. Resisting the strong urge to hide behind Virg, I mumbled, "Yes'm."

"Good. We've got everything we need in our pickup. I assume everything you need is in here?"

"Got it all and the kitchen sink," quipped Virg, not at all put off by Molly's glare. Then again…the two of them had both been teenage rebels so maybe that made them immune to each other's effects.

"Good. Guess we're ready to go then unless someone else is joining the party."

I shrugged and headed back towards the apartment to go get Mouse. "Just the dog."

There was a moment of silence then Carlos yelled, "You're not fitting the dog in that jeep!"

Virg laughed at that and I heard her response of, "You don't know us very well, do you?" before I was in the house and looking for the dog. I found him by the fireplace and patted his head before heading down into the lab.

"Leaving now?" greeting Bob from his spot in the middle of Little Chicago.

"Yeah," I replied. "Anything up in town?"

The skull shook slightly from left to right and he replied, "Nothing more than the usual. Oh, and good job finally getting some, kid. I was starting to wonder if you were gay."

My cheeks burned at that and I gaped at him for a minute. Then I scowled and exclaimed, "You thought I was _gay?!_"

"Like I said, I was starting to wonder. But last night…woohoo, you two made some _noise!_ I wouldn't have minded getting in on that action."

"No, Bob. Just…no. So everything's quiet?"

"Yup. All's quiet on the western front. And the eastern and…well, all of them."

"Good." I tugged out three thick books and sat them down near him on the table. "Something to keep you company while we're gone."

The orange lights that were his eyes sparked brighter and he said, "Wow. You're a peach, kid."

"Thanks. And, Bob, if we don't make it back…Ebenezar's going to come after you. If James starts showing magic, I think it'd be best that you go to him."

"Aw, you're gonna make me start crying, kid. Don't worry so much. You'll make it back."

Glad one of us has confidence in that.

Shrugging, I patted the skull gently then turned to leave the lab. Just before I closed the door, Bob called, "Nicolas."

I stopped short and turned to stare at him. He hadn't called me by my first name since I'd whined about him using it when I was twelve.

"Yeah, Bob?"

"Be careful. And take care of that cupcake of yours."

I smiled at that and said, "If it's in my power, she'll be the one of us that makes it through this if the rest of us don't."

He just nodded and I closed the door, heading back upstairs. Then I hooked Mouse's leash on, checked to make sure everything in the apartment was in place and turned off, then I headed out the door. It closed behind me with a hollow sound that made me shudder and Mouse whined before throwing his shoulder reassuringly against my leg. I patted his head in response and murmured, "Let's go, boy."

As we got back up to where the vehicles were parked, I looked over at Carlos and Molly, who were having a quiet conversation by their truck. They had three kids now if I recalled correctly…what would happen to them if they died? The eldest would be…Hell's bells, he'd be about the same age as I was when Mom died.

My eyes drifted to Virg then and I wished, for a brief second, that last night hadn't happened. That she hadn't suddenly changed places in my heart, from friend to lover. I'd be constantly keeping an eye on her now, sacrificing my own safety for hers.

Though…I did that already. So I guess my argument is moot.

"Are we ready?" she asked softly as I came near her again. Mouse pawed at her leg for petting and she obliged him by rubbing his ears but kept her gaze on me.

"As we'll ever be," I replied. "Molly, Carlos! We're ready to roll."

Carlos nodded at that and grinned, giving me a thumbs up before climbing into the driver's side of their pickup. Molly smiled as she climbed into the passenger seat and I swear I saw her laughing as we squeezed Mouse, Virg, and me into what room was left in the Jeep. It felt like a clown car inside with Mouse's head resting right on my shoulder but I was used to that. With my height, getting in and out of the Beetle daily feels like a clown car.

Grunting, I looked sideways at Virg after readjusting the seat. She stared back at me for a moment, fear in her eyes.

"Go," she breathed.

I threw the gears into drive before either of us could think further and decide not to continue with this madness. And we were on our way.

There was no turning back now.


	20. Ashes, Ashes, We All Fall Down

**Title:** Ashes, Ashes, We All Fall Down  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for...nothing.  
**POV:** Nicolas "Nick" Dresden  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse, AU after _Proven Guilty_...all previous in the series found here.  
**Summary:** Tread carefully before that first rush into war and take care. And hold those you love that are near closer than ever.

* * *

"I am so not liking the look of this." 

"Shh," hushed Virg, glaring at me. She then looked at Molly across the shifting surface of the water in the silver bowl that sat on the ground, runes etched carefully into both sides of it. The four of us crouched around it and watched as images of the Red Court stronghold flashed across it.

Molly's hands shook as she held them out over the bowl then she hissed, "I can't find him. There's…there's something blocking me."

Carlos frowned then gently laid a hand on her shoulder, fingers pressing gently. "Come back, Moll. I think we have enough."

I watched as she shuddered and slowly dropped her hands, the images she had summoned up within the bowl fading. It was the most delicate spell I had ever seen done and I knew it had taken a lot too. Probably enough that she wouldn't be up to much for a few days.

As she sank against her husband, she said, "They have someone that knows magic there. Or at least wards."

"What _was_ that spell?" asked Virg, her eyes wide.

"Variation on Harry's Little Chicago model with a lot of changes," replied Molly. "Bob helped me figure it out years ago and I've gotten better with it thanks to sharing a few ideas with other wizards trying the same thing but on a smaller scale."

"Neat. Though why don't you do anything like that, Nick?"

I smiled at her and replied, "Liz is the one with delicacy. I'm a brute like Dad, as Bob is fond of saying, what with my throwing my magic around like a lumberjack gone stir crazy."

Molly smiled and asked, "Was that Bob's actual metaphor?"

"No and I'm not about to repeat it as it involved porn stars, rabbits, and a two by four."

Carlos' eyes widened in surprise and Virg choked down a laugh, shaking her head and muttering to herself, "I don't want to know, I don't want to know, I don't want to know…"

My dad's former apprentice chuckled and patted her husband's shoulder, saying, "One day I'll actually introduce you to Bob, dear. Now take me to our tent: I need rest. And possibly sex."

"Yes, ma'am!" exclaimed Carlos, swooping up his wife faster than you can say 'hi' and was gone into their tent. Mouse lifted his head where he lay next to the fire, ears perked, then whimpered and lay back down with a paw over his nose.

Virg laughed and crawled over to the big dog, hugging him and stroking his ears. "There, there, Mouse," she said reassuringly. "We'll protect you from the sex crazy old people."

"Careful," I said, chuckling, "you don't want Molly to hex you." Sitting down next to her, I wrapped an arm loosely about her shoulders and sighed. She pulled away from Mouse then and cuddled against me with a frown.

"You're worried," she said softly.

"That evident?"

"Nick, I've known you since we were twelve. I _know_ when you're worried."

"True," I said. Sighing again, I tilted my head back and continued, "I'm starting to think this isn't worth the risk."

She was silent for a moment then spoke gently.

"It's their numbers, isn't it?"

"Yeah. There's…there's so _many_ of them. And only four of us."

"Five if you count Mouse!" pointed out Virg. "And you had better count your super dog."

I nodded mildly and said, "Five. Still…"

"Nick…if we don't do this, no one else will."

"I know, I know." I closed my eyes tightly and bowed my head for a moment. Then I hissed, "But I'm afraid now. Even more than before."

Her fingers fluttered against my stomach where one of her hands rested and she whispered, "Because of me."

"Yeah."

"Nick…"

"I don't want to lose you," I breathed, my voice tight with pain.

She hugged me tightly then and hissed, "You're not going to lose me, Nick. I'm going to be right next to you the whole time, I promise."

What about after? If we survive, what about the years to come?

You're only human, Virg. And you can't survive the wear of time like I can.

"I'm going to be next to you until the day I die," she breathed, kissing my forehead. "I _promise._"

"That's what I'm afraid of," I whispered.

"You want this to end so soon?"

"No! God, Virg, I just…"

I opened my eyes and looked at her, saying, "I'm so afraid that I'm going to lose you like Dad lost Mom."

"By gunshot?" she said, confused.

"Too soon," I corrected in a solemn voice.

She stared at me then sighed. After a moment she met my eyes and almost stared long enough to start up a soulgaze.

"I won't be able to be with you forever," she said slowly and firmly. "But I _will_ be with your for however long I can and in whatever way I can. I promise you that, Nick. Believe me."

I do believe you.

I just don't want to think about a world without you.

Because everything in that world is empty.

We sat there for a moment then she said, "C'mon. We should get some sleep."

"Yeah," I mumbled, nodding numbly. She just looked at me then gently pulled me up off the ground, forcing me to my feet and leading me over to the other tent.

Inside we cuddled in the dark with Mouse resting at our feet and she breathed, "I love you."

My breath hitched in my throat and I thought that I wouldn't be able to reply for a moment. Then I kissed her gently and replied, "Love you too."

Too much.

I realize now that I love you too much, Virg. And that's going to kill me in the end.


	21. To the Depths and Back

**Title:** To the Depths and Back  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for...vampires being butchered.  
**POV:** Harry Blackstone Copperfield Dresden  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse, AU after _Proven Guilty_...all previous in the series found here.  
**Summary:** When you've almost given up, this is a time when hope is renewed. And you're given the opportunity to see your family again.

* * *

_Harry. _

_Harry, wake!_

I came to with adrenaline burning through my veins, stumbling upright and hissing as the thorn manacles tightened. In my just waking panic, I'd tried to pull power together, forgetting where I was.

"Lash?"

_Something is happening_, she said. _Someone is here._

"How can you tell?" I asked, glancing towards the steel door.

_Your power may be chained but what little I have is not._ She seemed to twist inside my head, like she was sitting down and trying to twist around to see something behind her. _I can feel their power thrumming in the air. Wizard power._

"Nick?!"

I ran for the window and peered up at it, trying to see anything beyond the sky above me. From experience, I knew that my prison was underground and that a road ran just past the window. Several Red's had taken the opportunity of it being there to kick dirt in my face and throw things at me.

All I could hear was the sound of fire for a moment then a voice I knew bellowed, "_VERUS!_" and the flames roared higher. An Amazon's scream echoed the roar and I knew that Virg was right where she always was at her best friend's side.

I saw a blur of green energy through the air then and blinked. Carlos? That meant Molly as well…how many had come with Nick? Only them?

_Curse this inability to do anything!_

"Hey, you're not the only one pissed about it," I growled at her. She snarled back – literally snarled – then pressed, _We must have one of them get the coin! There is no summoning it with your magic leashed._

"How?" I snapped. "We don't even know where they are…"

A sudden burst of dust into the room made me look up and I found Nick there, the right side of his face sheathed in blood. But he had a vicious expression on his face reminiscent of his mother at her worst and his dark eyes glowed with battle lust alongside joy from finding me.

"Dad!"

He then thrust his arm through the bars, tossing something wrapped in a handkerchief at me. It hadn't quite landed before he pulled back, grinning at me once, before vanishing entirely. I heard him loose a war cry and then the whistle of a blade through the air before it struck a target.

_Harry!_

I looked down at where the handkerchief had landed and my breath hitched in my throat at what had rolled out of it.

The coin.

Nick had brought me the _coin._

He'd known somehow. Someone had told him.

And he _brought it._

_Harry, touch it,_ hissed Lash. _Touch it and I can break these manacles with a thought!_

Nick _knew._

And he didn't care.

Enlivened, I placed my bare foot on top of the coin and bared my teeth in a feral grin. It burned, hot and cold all at once, and Lash bellowed in triumph as she reconnected with her true power. The rush of it made me echo her scream and the whole world seemed to shake.

Then the manacles were gone, shattered beyond repair, and I bent to pick up the coin, clutching it tight.

With no clothes, I only had one choice. One way that I could use it and not lose it entirely.

My son, his friend, and my friends needed me.

So I swallowed the coin and growled, "Lash."

_Yes!_ She screamed in response and I spun, pointing one hand up at the barred window. I smiled, all teeth, and thrust my will together into a tight, focused knot.

"_FORZARE!_"

Wind roared and the side of the building along with part of the road exploded as the pure force I'd called burst out of it. Then I sprang up through the new hole with a howl of rage, Lash screaming with me in fury. A Red froze at the sight of me and I bore down upon it, snapping its body in half with a twist of huge, wolfish jaws.

Fury swept me forward into the mass of the rest of them and I tore my way through them like tissue in an attempt to get to my son and Virg, who were an embattled knot in the center of it all. Claws ripped at my side, tearing great gouges out and hunks of fur and flesh but Lash had ample power to spare. And it took her as little to heal as it took her to turn me into a howling monster of death.

Virg's Amazon cry echoed in my ears and I made it to them as she sliced a Red's head from its shoulder with a savage swipe. She spun towards me as I skidded to a stop next to them and I can imagine what she thought. A jet colored wolf the size of a car with red points in the dark for eyes and a rune blazing in crimson on its forehead - that would scream danger in anyone's mind.

Nick caught her arm before she could swing and his gaze caught with mine.

Then the Red's screamed forward and we were thrust back into battle. Virg fought like a demon, her sword nothing but a silver blur at most times, with her back up against Nick's. And my son slashed with his sword when they got to close and threw fire at every opportunity he could, shielding the two of them when they were overpowered. I swept around them in an ever-widening and shrinking circle, breaking the bodies of the Red's that just kept coming and ravaging them when they overwhelmed the two of them.

When the rush of them finally ended, Nick screamed, "CARLOS! MOLLY! Back! BACK!"

There was a burst of green light and a shout in Spanish and I saw my former apprentice's blonde hair appear amongst the Red's fighting beneath us as she and her husband fought their way out. A hand dug into my fur then and I jerked my head around to look at Nick, who was eying me curiously. When I realized what he was thinking, I wish I could have laughed.

_We are not a beast of burden!_ Snapped Lash as Nick and Virg heaved themselves up onto my back.

_Right now we are_, I replied before howling and leaping down at the pack of Red's below us that were chasing Molly and Carlos. My bulk crushed a dozen and more crashed into my back, slashed away by Virg's quick blade.

"Grab!" shouted Nick, leaning over my side as I lunged forward to run side-by-side with the fleeing couple. Carlos stared for a moment then thrust Molly's hand into my son's and she was hauled up. He spun, hurling that green energy of his again, before he grabbed at Nick's once again offered hand. When I felt the weight of him on my back, I snarled and put all my effort into running, leaving the snarling and angry Red's behind us as we fled.

For a moment there was only the numbed silence that comes after escaping from what was possible death. Then I heard Molly whimper and felt a hand grip at my fur tightly, almost pulling it out.

"Harry. Oh, God, Harry, _why_?"

Because I had to, Molly.

Nick hissed directions in my ear as we ran and I followed them, ending up in a flat, half-wooded area. An old Jeep and Carlos' truck were hidden amongst the trees and the only thing that showed someone had camped there were the spots of flattened grass. Another good hint was the steadily burning fire and the slim figure of my brother sitting next to it with a heavily bandaged Mouse at his side.

Carlos and Molly practically flung themselves off me as I came to a halt, which hurt. Did they think I was going to go mad?

Nick carefully made his way down and gentlemanly helped Virg down – and I didn't miss the little kiss on the cheek or her hand clutching possessively at his arm. He then looked at me and said, "Dad."

I snorted then Lash let the change fade, putting me back in my exhausted and beaten body. Nick caught me as I swayed and my brother came to his feet and was at my other side to balance me moments later. I sank gratefully against them even though my skin twitched at every touch because of the torment from the Red's.

From somewhere a pair of sweatpants came up and I numbly put them on with Nick supporting me. Thomas then flung a blanket over me and I sank down to the ground between the two of them by the fire. Mouse levered himself to his feet and limped over, laying down on front of me and gave me the begging eyes. Smiling, I reached out and patted his head, murmuring, "I missed you too, boy."

"Harry," said Thomas and I turned my head to look at my brother. "Why did you leave?"

I knew that one was coming.

Along with 'how could you make a deal with one of those _thing's?_' but that one would come later.

Shrugging, I replied, "I didn't leave per choice. I got sent out." Looking at all of them, I continued, "The Merlin sent me out to watch the compound here. There'd been rumors of the Red's wanting to start up the war again and they were sending out Wardens to watch some of their places."

There was a stunned silence and then Carlos breathed, "They wanted to get rid of you."

"They've wanted to get rid of me for years, Carlos. Someone found out I had the last of the Denarii and they decided now was the time to actually do it."

"How do you know?" asked Molly.

I scowled and replied, "Because that was the first thing they made sure to take when they jumped me. Someone told them where I would be."

"Jesus," breathed Thomas. "I thought we'd gotten rid of the Black Council years ago."

"Evil never dies," spat Nick, his voice shaking with rage. "Damnit, they told me they didn't know where you were! They knew, they fucking _knew_, all along where you were!" He plunged his head into his hands, fingers clenching his hair, and I laid a hand on his back. Another joined mine as Virg sank to the ground next to him.

She leaned over and softly said, "They can't be truthful to those of the family they hate."

"I know," he breathed back, seeming calmer now at the sound of her voice. "But I'd hoped they'd set that aside and help me."

Oh, it was good to know my son was still the same despite the years of separation. But what had happened between him and Virg?

Sighing, I said, "Well I'm back now. And we'll find who did it, grasshopper. We will."

Nick jerked at the name he hadn't heard in years and turned to look at me. And for a moment he looked so much younger.

"God, Dad, I'm glad you're back."

"Me too," I said, smiling and squeezing his shoulder.

"What about the coin?" asked Molly, effectively shattering what little happiness I'd had brought back. Sighing, I looked her intently.

"Michael's known for years that I still had the coin, Molly. He and Sanya were there when I went after Nicodemus when he took Liz and Nick. And they both knew I wasn't about to give it up when I had to deal with shit like that happening to my family."

Frowning, I continued, "Also, it was sitting at the back of the closet until I left. I figured I might need the help if the Red's ever found me. Besides that, I hadn't touched the coin in years."

"But…Dad told me that the Denarians were still connected to their coins even if they weren't near them…"

"I have a shadow of her in my head – at least she always appears as a woman and speaks as one. She was actually supposed to disappear if I took up the coin but never did. Which I'm curious to why that is…"

_I am less of the shadow that I was,_ explained Lash, _because of your taking of the coin. Since you took it up, I was strengthened somewhat. Unless you completely demolish your connection to the coin, I will be here._

"And this thing had never tried to control you?" pressed Carlos.

I sighed at that and bowed my head for a moment. Then I spoke very carefully and precisely.

"To my mind she is a she, not a thing, and her name is Lasciel. And no, she has not tried to control me since I took up the coin to go after Nicodemus. She had never tried to coax me to it since nor to influence me. And she could _easily_ do it now if she put her mind to it since I can't just throw the coin away as I had to swallow it."

Molly paled at that and breathed, "God, Harry…"

"Molly."

She stared at me as I said, "I am more afraid of _me_ getting too addicted to her power than her controlling me. Me saying that should make it evident that she has no goals."

_None except destroying the one that tried to get rid of us both,_ snarled Lash.

_I can get behind that one._

"So what do we do next?" asked Thomas. "Go back to Chicago and pretend everything is fine?"

Nick scowled and said, "Uncle, you said the Council was trying to have all of us declared dead when you left to come after us. I don't think that's the definition of 'fine'."

"They're what?!" I snapped, feeling anger rush up.

My brother just nodded and hissed, "And they'll go and tell Lizbeth that."

"Sonovabitch."

Carlos frowned then said, "We can't leave right now with us all exhausted from that fight. We'll have to wait until morning…and pray the Red's don't find us."

I snarled, literally, at that and spat, "They won't live long enough to see anything if any of them find us."

My savage tone seemed to surprise Molly and Virg but my brother, son, and Carlos all just nodded solemnly. They'd all seen me fight savagely at one point or another and I'm not referring to the just previous decimation of the Red's.

Slowly, we all moved about and settled down, just pulling out blankets and sleeping bags and laying down around the fire. Suddenly hungry for familiarity so much it hurt, I made my way over to Nick and look curiously at him for a moment. He just smiled and nodded, hugging me tightly after I finished laying down my bedding.

"I missed you, Dad," he breathed as I wrapped my arms around him in return. "So much has happened…"

"You can tell me everything on the way back home," I said softly. "And I mean everything, including what's going on between you and Virg."

He tensed for a moment then laughed, pulling slightly away from me. And his exhausted face that had aged so much since I'd last seen it almost five years ago looked like it had then.

"I love her, Dad. I think I always have."

Oh thank…someone. Whoever will listen to someone like me because I doubt God is going to.

"I'm happy for you. Bob was starting to wonder if you were gay, I think."

He snorted at that and I knew my dear familiar had decided to tell him that. Didn't surprise me. Bob's always been blunt and didn't care what he said or how he said it.

Nick grinned and started to say something when we heard, "Can I join the hugfest?"

We both looked up at Virg, who was standing above us with a smile, and I loosened an arm from Nick. She sank down next to me and hugged me briefly but warmly, whispering, "I'm so glad you're back, sir."

As she pulled away from me and moved to Nick's side, I said, "Harry, Virg."

She blinked then nodded. "'Kay, Harry."

Nick grinned and moved to hug her tightly, kissing her cheek gently. She smiled and kissed him back before saying, "We should get some sleep. Molly and Carlos were out minutes ago."

"Yeah. G'night, Dad."

"Night, grasshopper, Virg."

"Goodnight, si…Harry."

Mouse lumbered over and sank down next to me as we settled in and I rolled over to hug the big dog. He licked me face in response and wagged his tail, obviously happy to have me back.

And I was happy too.

I was back with my family again. And the troubles we had before us…they would crumble beneath our feet.

I'd make sure of that.


	22. Half Triumphant Return

**Title:** Half-Triumphant Return  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for...a little death and some threats.  
**POV:** Harry Blackstone Copperfield Dresden  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse, AU after _Proven Guilty_...  
**Summary:** Some returns home are triumphant, with a parade and trumpets blaring. But this one...this return is nothing such as that.

* * *

I was jostled awake as the Jeep came to a stop, Nick cursing under his breath as the engine rattled ominously. The vehicle just couldn't withstand the presence of two wizards in it and was going to give up the ghost pretty soon it seemed. It groaned as he cut the engine off and Virg sighed.

"You're repairing this if it breaks, mister."

"Its not my fault we break vehicles by simply being in them," said my son grumpily back. Then he turned in the driver's seat and I felt his hand on my shoulder. "Dad…we're home."

"So I noticed," I muttered, opening my eyes slowly. Lifting a hand, I rubbed at my face and grimaced at the weeks of scruffy beard. Nick noticed that and smiled before climbing out of the Jeep and starting the process of unpacking.

Virg rolled her eyes and shoved her seat forward after she climbed out and I unfolded myself through that hole, feeling a few too many aches than I liked pop up at the motion. She then pressed something into my hand and smiled before moving to help my son with the unpacking.

Frowning, I looked down at what she had given me and found the key to my apartment in my palm. The ache for home and familiarity rose up in me again and I practically ran at the door, fumbling the key into the lock. As I shoved the door in with my shoulder and stumbled inside, I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

"Hells bells…I'm home."

I heard the click of Mouse's nails on the floor and turned my head to see him limping in with Thomas right behind him. My brother just smiled then unexpectedly pulled me into a hug. I stiffened instinctively at the contact but relaxed into it, telling myself that this was no Red Court vampire about to torture me. This was my brother - my family - and he had missed me.

"Welcome home, little brother," he murmured into my ear.

"S'good to be home," I said softly. "But there's still things to fix."

He pulled back from me, gray eyes growing a bit lighter.

"The Council."

"That's only one of the things I'm going to fix," I growled, clenching a fist. "Them and whoever it is after James."

Thomas nodded and said, "I'm with you."

"I know."

I glanced around the room then closed my eyes again, reveling in the feel of home. It had been empty since Murph had died…but it was still home. It was still where we had lived and raised two wonderful children.

Home.

I really was home.

And now it was time to take care of things.

"Sir, you can't just go in there!"

"Can't, can I?"

Wizards and apprentices scattered as the locked doors they hid behind were blown off their hinges, a tall figure in a dark trenchcoat striding through. A rune-carved staff smoldered with fire as the figure quipped, "Huh. Looks like I _could_ just come in here."

"Dresden!" roared the Merlin, a vein bulging in his forehead.

"Yes?" replied two voices as son came to stand next to father with several other figures lurking in the shadows behind them.

"You were forbidden from making an attempt at a rescue mission!" bellowed the Merlin, glaring straight at Nick.

The blond scowled and spat, "And you thought trying to declare me dead was the thing to do in response? That was about as stupid as you trying to get rid of my father."

Whispers sprang up all around the room and I smirked. Slowly I walked forward, weaving between the chairs and tables towards where the Senior Council sat. The Merlin rose nervously from his chair, followed by a few other members. Ebenezar just reclined back in his chair with a slow smile and I heard a low chuckle come from the Gatekeeper's direction.

When I finally got close, I planted my staff in front of me and urged Hellfire to burn more furiously in the runes, causing a crimson glow to burn around me. Then I tilted my head and looked up at the Merlin with a feral smile as I accessed the coin with little more than a thought, causing Laciel's emblem to glow on my forehead and my eyes to turn to cold red points in the dark.

"You all made a grave mistake trying to get rid of me," I growled in a low voice. As the Merlin opened his mouth to say something, I stepped up onto the slightly raised spot where they sat and he staggered back a step. Smirking, I let my gaze turn over the other members of the Senior Council and they took steps backwards as well. "Who did it? Who is the traitor that turned me over to the Red Court?"

Fixing my gaze back on the Merlin, I bared my teeth and spat, "Or were you just _that_ desperate to get rid of me?"

"Traitor?!" gasped Ancient Mai. "What…"

"My position was given away," I hissed venomously. "The Red's found me and one of you – because I know all of you are well aware now that I hold the last Denarius – told them. Because they made sure that that was the first thing they took from me."

LaFortier, shaking and pale, managed to find a voice and gasped, "That could have been anyone!"

I speared him with my gaze now and he jerked back with a hiss of breath, eyes wide.

"Anyone? Oh no, not anyone. One would not have hissed 'Your Council sends their utmost regards' in my ear if it were just anyone. Red's don't play mind games. So…"

Thumping my staff against the floor, I growled, "Who was it? Hmm? Anyone can answer, not just the Seniors. Opinions, ideas? Anything?"

There were uneasy murmurs from the wizards in response and Nick strode forward to stand behind me as the Wardens suddenly appeared from the shadows. Morgan came forward from the back of the raised area where the Senior Council sat and I smiled at him.

"Morgan."

"Dresden. Still holding onto that coin, I see."

"So long as I need to protect my family, yes."

The Warden inclined his head then said, "LaFortier."

I blinked then bared my teeth, growling, "Really?"

"Would I lie to you, Dresden?"

"Many times."

Morgan scowled and said, "I am not now."

"He is!" screamed LaFortier, rising to his feet. He then made a grab for his staff, wailing in pain as Nick darted past me with his sword out and slapped the length of wood away. The older wizard then snarled and shouted, "You wretched whelp!"

"Don't. Move," I growled, thrusting my staff in his face. Staring right at him, I hissed, "Are you a traitor?"

LaFortier seemed about to deny it, to scream more protests, then something changed. A confident smirk crossed his face and he purred, "You're good, Dresden. But what will you do against one of your own?"

It took me a second to process what he was saying. Then I snarled and snapped, "Thomas, Carlos! Get to Liz's! _NOW!_"

"Its too late," hissed LaFortier amid the scrapping of chairs as every wizard in the room stood up now. "By now your dear little grandson is already ours. And your daughter…well, she might make a pretty pet for someone."

"You _bastard!_" howled Nick. He would have lunged forward with his sword but Virg was instantly in his way, keeping him from trying to kill a man.

He was too young to have that on his conscience just yet.

"So, Dresden, what now?"

"Now?" I asked, narrowing my eyes at LaFortier. "Run."

There were gasps from around me and he took a step back in shock.

"Run? You…you must be mad!"

"Run," I repeated, baring my teeth at him.

He stared then took another step back before snarling and throwing up a hand, trying to pull together power for some sort of spell. There were cries from the Senior Council of shields and protection spells but I ignored that.

The last thing LaFortier saw was a huge wolf's jaws before his throat was ripped out and his body hit the floor. With a furious howl, I spun back to face the room as myself and bellowed over the screams.

"If there are any of you that had a part in the plans of the Black Council, run now. Because if I find you…I _will_ kill you."

None too few ran for the door, hands over their mouths and eyes wide with fear. And I couldn't bring myself to care about the horror in their eyes. The disgust.

My _daughter_ and _grandchild_ were in danger.

Screw everyone else.

"Hoss."

I tilted my head at the sound of that familiar old voice and looked at Ebenezar, who had finally risen from his chair. He gave me a long, assessing look then said, "Go, boy."

"No!" bellowed the Merlin. "You won't be going anywhere, Dresden! Not af…"

The tip of the sword at his throat cut the head of the White Council off and he stared down with some fear into my son's pain filled eyes.

"By all that's holy, Merlin," he hissed in a cold, low voice that carried the same dangerous edge his mother's had, "if you try and stop us, I will kill you."

"You wouldn't dare!" exclaimed Ancient Mai.

"Try him," spat Virg, glaring. "I dare you."

Nick snorted then growled, "We don't have time for this shit." He then turned to look at me and I nodded briefly before we walked as one towards the exit, Virg slipping in between us to grip our hands in hers. She was a fine girl, this one.

"Dresden!" bellowed the Merlin from behind us. "If you step out of that door, consider yourself an enemy of this Council. Both of you!"

Nick stiffened and I turned slowly to regard the Merlin with a frosty glare.

"It seems I was already considered an enemy of this Council. So kiss my demon possessed ass."

With that we walked out and didn't look back once.

It felt good to finally tell the Council where they could stick their bullshit.

Virg commandeered the driving of the Beetle, claiming neither of us as fit to drive. And from the way I was barely keeping myself from using Lasciel's coin and how Nick was squeezing the life out of the back of the driver's seat, I couldn't disagree with her.

"Will they be okay?" I heard Nick ask after a moment. He didn't sound like the man I knew he was, with his own accomplishments and experience under his belt. No, he sounded like that fourteen-year-old boy who had wanted me to lie to him about his mother's death.

Softly I replied, "I don't know. But if they harmed a hair on Liz's head…"

As I clenched a fist, I felt the heat of Lasciel's anger echoing underneath mine. For all her comments scorning my feelings for my daughter years ago, she had a certain fondness for her.

"I'll kill them all," I finished in a savage growl.


	23. Ware the Edge

**Title:** Ware the Edge  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine.  
**Rating:** Caution for...a cursing and bad, bad plans.  
**POV:** Harry Blackstone Copperfield Dresden  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse, AU after _Proven Guilty_...  
**Summary:** Loved one's being taken can make anyone a little crazy.

* * *

"ELIZABETH!" I roared as I charged towards the shattered front door of the house, having jumped out of Beetle before it even came to a stop. I shouldered what remained of the wood aside and continued into the house without waiting.

Behind me, I heard Nick come in, his voice trembling as he said, "Dad…they're gone."

"Everything's been burnt," Virg called from somewhere else in the house. "Anything that could've been used for a tracking spell…and everything else. Why?"

I growled and shifted aside the remains of a couch after spying something underneath it. "This would be why," I commented softly as Nick came up behind me.

_Vicious,_ commented Lasciel. _Faerie fire._

"Liz's spell," I said, crouching down next to the faerie corpse. There were burn scars all up one side of her body that sparked still even with her death, glowing and shifting between colors. It had been one of the first spells my daughter had created on her own and she had, as Lasciel said, called it 'faerie fire'.

I was also darkly amused that this was the same faerie that had tried to kidnap her so many years ago.

"Ouch," hissed Nick, peering over my shoulder at the wounds. Then he glanced around and called, "Uncle? Carlos?"

"Back here!" shouted Thomas. I rose and turned towards the back door as they came in, hefting a limp body between them. "We found him in the backyard."

"Liz? James?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

Carlos shook his head and my brother hissed, "They jumped over to the NeverNever, Harry."

Shit.

"They'd be going to Faerie then, wouldn't they?" asked Nick. He then shifted the couch back around and helped to lower Paul's barely breathing body down onto it. The man wheezed and choked on blood as he came back to consciousness, trying to lash out at them.

I strode forward and grabbed his shoulder, already knowing by Thomas' frown that he was a goner. Besides…I could _smell_ the death around him. In my anger, I was tapping into the coin and bringing a few of the wolfish traits forward, which I quickly ceased. That was far too much reliance on it than I wanted to have.

"What happened?" I snarled.

Paul twitched and stared at me, the one eye he still had wide. The other one had been ripped out of the socket after something savaged the side of his face.

"M-monsters. They…they took them."

"What did they look like?"

"Harry," started Carlos but Nick cut him off with a snarl.

"Plants. Liz…Liz said they were f-faeries. Told James to run." Paul grunted and his eye rolled back in his head for a moment as he arched his back in pain. "One…one caught him before he c-could. I tried – I tried to stop them but…"

I frowned at that then asked, "Did they say where they were going?"

"N-no. But…I…"

He twitched his right hand and it fell to the side, fingers drifting limply open. I looked down and tears involuntarily came to my eyes as I reached down and picked up Liz's bracelet from within his bloodied grasp. Then I met my son-in-law's dying gaze again and he smiled.

"I never…believed…till now," he gasped. "She said – she said you'd come, that…that y-you'd save her and James. That…that you'd need this."

"Thank you," I breathed, clutching the faerie bracelet to my chest. "I will bring them back, Paul."

"G-good." He then twitched and blood streamed from the corner of his mouth as his head fell to the side.

_Dead_, hissed Lasciel. _Faerie magic. The Fae have them then, we know that for certain now._

_They won't keep them for long_, I spat.

Spinning around, I stared at the other for a moment before hissing, "I'll need an hour to put the spell together. After that…I'll go alone."

"The hell you will!" exploded Nick. He slammed me against a wall with a snarl and hissed, "_We_ are coming with you."

"There's no reason for all of us to risk our lives!"

My son snarled at that and tightened his grip on my coat.

"There was no reason for you and Mom to risk your lives for so many years either," he spat in a cold, viciously calm voice. "But you _did_. So don't you fucking tell me what I can and can't do, Dad!"

I frowned and growled out, "Nick…"

"Plus," he continued as if I hadn't spoken, "I knew about this. I _knew_ before we came after you!" As my face and those of Thomas and Carlos went to shock, his voice dropped, turning from anger to sorrow. "I _knew_. And I chose _you_ over _James_."

The anger came back as he slammed me against the wall again and roared, "So don't you fucking tell me I can't go rescue my nephew when I'm the damn reason he's in this mess!"

_He is most definitely your son,_ commented Lasciel with an amused smile. _And we cannot do this alone._

I scowled at that. _I don't want to watch him die too, Lash._

_Then we'll make sure he doesn't._

"Okay," I said. "Okay. I'm sorry, grasshopper."

Nick scowled and let me go, taking a few steps back where he glared at me. Then he snorted and spat, "Good. Let's go then."

"Yeah," I said slowly, feeling as though something had gone terribly wrong. _Lash?_

_He is as distraught as you, Harry_, she assured me as we left the house, Virg stayed behind with Carlos to handle the police. As Thomas drove the Beetle towards home, she continued, _After this, things will get better._

_Depending on if we survive this._

_That, dear host, is negativity. And we can afford none of that._

Sighing, I nodded absently, not noticing my brother looking at me worriedly. _True_, I admitted before starting to put together what I would need for the spell to try and see where Liz was as well as anything that could be put together as a weapon.

When we arrived at the apartment, Molly gave me the answer to the first.

"I can scry," she said. I blinked then handed her the bracelet, only slightly remembering what she was referring to.

_The seeing bowl she created with help from your spirit using ideas of your Little Chicago,_ said Lash. I felt her smile as she added, _You're getting old on me, Harry._

_I'm only seventy-six_, I growled in defense. Then I sank down onto the couch and – surprisingly – fell asleep. An hour later I woke up to Mouse licking my face and blinked as Thomas leaned into my vision. "Did she find them?" I mumbled as I rubbed the sleep from my eyes.

"Yes," he replied. "But…"

"Its bad, isn't it?"

"All she found was James, Harry. Liz apparently gave him the bracelet and he's been wearing it long enough for it to only trace back to him."

I sat dumbly for a moment at that news then slowly said, "So…so, she could be…dead?"

Thomas frowned and replied, "We don't know, little brother." His dark eyes turned a shade lighter then and his mouth twitched into a feral snarl. "If she is though, we'll both make sure they don't live to celebrate killing a Dresden."

I found myself smiling as well and held out my hand so he could help me up. As he dragged me upright, I growled, "They won't live to celebrate getting away with _taking_ them if I have anything to say about it. Now where are we going?"

"Faerie," he said. "Nick and Carlos handled putting everything they thought we'd need together whilst Molly scryed then dealt with Bob over where we should try going in through. He said to wish you luck. They're outside now in the cars waiting for us."

"Perfect."

Together we walked towards the door and I stopped him as I closed it behind us. "Thomas."

"Harry?" he queried, one eyebrow arched.

"Do me a favor."

"What?"

"Keep an eye on Nick. If things get bad, all of you get the hell out of there."

Thomas frowned and asked softly, "What about you, little brother?"

I frowned at that and ducked my head so I didn't have to look at him. "If Liz is dead, we'll both go insane. You have to keep him focused on getting James and keeping him safe."

"What about _you_?" he pressed.

I growled and slammed my gaze up to meet his, the wolf's eyes in place and Lasciel's sigil blazing on my forehead. He took a step back as I spat, "The second we find them, I'm going to start tearing each and every one of them limb from limb until I find their damn ringleader. And he will not like the ways I have planned to rip the information out of him."

"Harry…you shouldn't rely on her that much."

"I'm not really intending on surviving this, Thomas."

"_Harry!_"

"What?" I snapped. "Hasn't it been enough? Nine years – nine _fucking_ years – without Murph. Do you know how many times I've consider _suicide?!_ Or how many times I wished I'd walked into the jail where they had that bastard and killed him?"

All anger faded abruptly and I slumped against the wall, the only reason I even still stood the fact that Lasciel forced me to stay up.

"I'm _tired_, Thomas."

"Harry…your family needs you."

"My family doesn't need an old man slowly going out of his mind," I snapped, shoving away from the wall. "Which is what I am, don't doubt that, Thomas. What do you _think_ the Red's did while they had me, hmm?"

He blanched at that, obviously not wanting to. Then he sighed and asked, "Why did you have to tell me this?"

I smiled grimly and replied, "Because you're the only one of them that'd do it."

My brother frowned then nodded. "She's holding you together, then?"

"Yeah."

"Okay. I'll do it. I don't like it but I'll do it."

As he started up the steps, I mumbled, "Thanks, Thomas."

_You lied straight to his face_, observed Lasciel. _And here I thought you were a horrible liar._

_Guess I've learned a thing or two from you_, I snipped as I followed up the steps and climbed into the Beetle's passenger seat.

_So…you're planning to find these fae and immerse yourself in the power of the coin, thereby losing all sanity and guaranteeing you die. You'll be dancing on a razor's edge, you know._

I smiled a bit. _Pretty much. And that was the point._

_And if your children don't get away?_

_Thomas will make sure they do. He promised._

Lasciel frowned then sighed, saying, _You truly are insane._

_You thought I wasn't being serious?_

_You're not so insane I have to hold your mind together as you told him._

I scowled and said, _Lash, I wish I really was that insane._

_Why?_ she asked.

_So I wouldn't feel so damn guilty._

"You okay, Dad?" asked Nick from the driver's seat.

"I'll be fine once we find James and Liz," I replied. "And, Nicolas, promise me something."

He twitched at the use of his full name then nodded. "Anything, Dad."

_You'll regret saying that,_ I thought. Staring at him, I said stonily, "If something happens, grab James and get the hell away."

"I…"

"He will," swore Virg, leaning out of the backseat. "You have _my_ word on that, Mister Dresden."

"Thank you, Virginia," I muttered. Then I closed my eyes and asked, _Lash?_

_Yes?_ She queried.

_Tell me anything I can do. I want to make sure that no one damn well starts thinking about going after my family in the future._

Lasciel laughed madly at that and said, _If there is anything we can do, Harry, it will be that._

_Good,_ I muttered. As she started going over things slowly, I idly ran my thumb across the band I still more on my left ring finger.

I'd make sure my family stayed safe with my dying breath. And put the fear of Heaven and Hell into everything in the world that dared make a move against them.


	24. Of Friends and Foolishness, 50 drabbles

Not the new chapter some of you might have wished for but simply something I thought I had uploaded.

* * *

**Title:** Of Friends and Foolishness  
**Author:** Terion  
**Disclaimer:** Not. Mine. Well..sorta.  
**Rating:** Caution for...some language.  
**Book or TV verse:** Book verse, AU after _Proven Guilty_...part of my ongoing series.  
**Summary:** 50 observations on Nick and Virg, alternating between the two of them commenting on each other at various points in their friendship and life.

**#01 – Package - Nick**

I _told _her not to open the package. But did Virg listen? No, of course not. And now there are a dozen pissed off pixies rampaging around her apartment whilst we hide under the couch.

**#02 – Obscure - Virg**

He used to be obscure when he talked to me, always nervous about saying something that could put me into danger. Now it's me being obscure, worried he's going to do something stupid and I won't be able to save him.

**#03 – Skeleton - Nick**

"Its just plastic," said Virg airily as we walked through a seemingly empty 'haunted house' someone had put together. When one of the skeleton's bones fell to the floor and turned into a powdery mess, I groaned and said, "Just plastic. You _had_ to say it was _just plastic_, didn't you?"

**#04 – Nurse - Virg**

Sometimes I wonder why I play nursemaid to him when he gets injured. Then I sit and watch him sleep through the pain and I remember. I remember that I nurse him back to health every time he gets hurt because I don't want to suffer through this world alone.

**#05 – Domino - Nick**

All of the carefully laid plans and efforts cascaded into chaos like dominoes in that moment; she kissed me and I realized that I'd been in love with my best friend for years.

**#06 – Thaw - Virg**

He can be like so much ice when he's asked about relationships. Then I touch his hand gently and smile at him and that ice thaws just a little bit.

**#07 – Waves - Nick**

I think of my emotions like waves, sometimes still and sometimes frothy with anger. And then there's Virg, who's always a rock amongst the waves, taking their crashes and furies without worry despite how they wear bits of her away.

**#08 – Burglar - Virg**

I find it amusing that he can call up a firestorm and shield himself from harm…but he can't be sneaky to save his skinny ass. Thus I've come to the conclusion that a good burglar Nick does not make.

**#09 – Frame - Nick**

Carefully I pick up the broken frame, ignoring her question of if I'm okay. I look down at the picture within the frame and carefully take it out, letting the shattered bit of metal and cardboard fall to the floor. The frame doesn't matter; it protected what it held – the picture of what my family was once. Her hand falls on my shoulder then and I look at her; she smiles in understanding and hands me an empty frame silently.

**#10 – Carpet - Virg**

I told him we shouldn't try doing things on the carpet. So it's his fault that he has carpet burns on his ass.

**#11 – Insect - Nick**

The thug smirked at me and I punched him, smashing him like the insect he was. No one tries to mug Virg and gets away with it.

**#12 – Mentor - Virg**

I lie back on the couch and watch them fence, Nick and Ramirez. From the kitchen, Molly laughs and I smile as I watch this man mentor the man I love in swordplay.

**#13 - Spirit - Nick**

If anyone accuses her of not having spirit, they're blind. 'Cause she is the most spirited woman I have ever known besides my mother.

**#14 - Wax - Virg**

The wax from the candle drips for the hundredth time off the table and I watch from the door as he starts to pour over the information again, trying to find a way to fix things.

**#15 - Trash - Nick**

Here am I, left like so much trash at the side of the road. I said something stupid and she left me. God, I'm a fool.

**#16 - Womb - Virg**

As he sleeps next to me, I sigh and lay one hand over my stomach, wondering what it would feel like to have a child – our child – nestling underneath that hand in the womb.

**#17 - Burn - Nick**

"Burn, burn, _burn!_" I screamed, throwing my will and power into the words and my hands. Fire roared up in response, hot and furious as my anger, and the building around us blazed as I picked up Virg's unconscious form and walked out. The place burnt into its own funeral pyre behind us and killed every thing within that had dared touch her.

**#18 - Flash - Virg**

For one brief flash it seems like he's gone…and I feel like my whole world has fallen and shattered into a million jagged shards.

**#19 - Anima - Nick**

"What's 'anima'?" asked Virg, leaning over my shoulder. "Animal in Latin," I replied. "Crazy spell to turn people into animal's. Very dangerous and could get me killed if I used it." "But you _have_ it," she said. "Well…you never know when something could be useful when you don't give a shit."

**#20 - Gamble - Virg**

"It's a gamble," I said, looking sideways at him. He puffed a breath out into the cold air then shrugged. I nodded then we both walked into the building, not knowing whether we'd live or die in this attempt to get information we needed.

**#21 - Statue - Nick**

I stand as still as a statue as she comes close to me, waiting for her to make her way there. Then I unlock my knees and let myself fall, knowing she'll catch me.

**#22 - Perfume - Virg**

We pass a woman wearing too much perfume and I enter a mild coughing fit in reaction to it all. And as Nick pats my back, I'm glad he doesn't care about those sort of feminine things.

**#23 - Wine - Nick**

I'm not sure how we ended up fighting in a wine cellar but in the aftermath Virg and I lie limply amongst the mess of the shelves and drink from a surviving bottle to celebrate being alive.

**#24 - Reflection - Virg**

I watch him duke it out with this reflection someone has created of him, waiting until they're both well into the fight. Then I come up behind it and cut off the head of that fucking monster imitating my man. It looked like him…but it had nothing of his soul.

**#25 - Take – N**

I carefully bend over her, very gently taking the ring I gave her years ago off her cold finger. Then I kiss her still lips one last time and leave before the funeral home employee's can wonder about the middle-aged man crying over the empty shell of an old woman.

**#26 - Magic – V**

Every time he does something, I am amazed. Amazed by every little thing he does with magic, even if it is the simplest thing.

**#27 - Fragment - Nick**

For one slim fragment of time, I thought she was dead. And I went mad in that moment when it seemed she was gone forever.

**#28 - Cats and Dogs - Virg**

My druggie ex-boyfriend and I used to fight like cats and dogs. Nick and I have never really fought in all our friendship. I guess that should've given me a clue about how well we fit together.

**#29 - Hum - Nick**

Because I'm Listening like Dad taught me, I hear the hum of it. And I'm able to shield the both of us before the bomb goes off.

**#30 - Flinch - Virg**

After he rescues me and tries to touch me, I flinch back. The expression on his face is so much hurt and understanding that I want to cry. Its not his fault that a White Court vampire tried to take me as a thrall again and I fell faster than I did the first time.

**#31 - Rush - Nick**

I feel the urge to kill the sorcerer with his same methods thrum within me, a tempting rush of power that I almost can't withstand. Then Virg touches my shoulder and I realize that would make me worse than him. That rush of power isn't so tempting anymore.

**#32 - Jester - Virg**

The faerie in jester's clothes cocks his head at me and asks, "A bargain have we? Your life for your wizard?" I take a breath and close my eyes for a moment, feeling my age for the first time in a while. I'm dying already – the least I can do here at the end is save Nick from one of his father's enemies. "Yes," I reply, opening my eyes so I can see the end. And hopefully him one last time.

**#33 - Haven - Nick**

Her arms wrap around me as I lay in bed and shake, overcome by my Sight because of the returning menace of ThreeEye. I roll over and look at her, my battle-scarred lioness, then bury my face in her shoulder, seeking the safe haven she's always been for me.

**#34 - Dusk - Virg**

He finds me lying limply against the wall in Undertown where I made my bargain, the faerie I made it with long gone. He rushes to me, picking up my limp body and hugging me tightly to his chest. "NO!" he screams and I want to comfort him so badly. But all I can do is watch his pain through dying eyes as the dusk falls.

**#35 - Chord - Nick**

The power thrums in a never-ending chord like a single note of music as it swirls around me then I break the circle and loose it, letting it rush out to find Virg and lead me to her.

**#36 - Indulgence - Virg**

Ice cream is my major indulgence and Nick knows it too because he comes home constantly with a pint of Ben and Jerry's and just grins as I snatch it away from him.

**#37 - Freezer - Nick**

Despite everything, Virg's mother can be as frosty as a freezer towards me sometimes. I guess it didn't help for her to find out that her daughter has almost died several time from being associated with me.

**#38 - Passage - Virg**

While the passage of time marrs me in any way it can, it barely touches him after he turns twenty-five. It seems he stands still in the midst of it and I can only watch as I am dragged further away from him.

**#39 - Coast - Nick**

Virg always loved the coast. So every year on that day she died I go there and sit on the beach for an entire day, just listening to the waves.

**#40 - Keepsake - Virg**

When our son turned fourteen, Nick gave him one of the more precious keepsakes he has – his father's pentacle. I smiled as I watched them, sitting there on the couch, as he explained the magical significance of it and Erik sat there in awe as he held what seemed to be slowly turning into a family heirloom in his hands.

**#41 - Morbid - Nick**

I swear that girl has the most morbid sense of humor of anyone I know sometimes. But I love her no matter what.

**#42 - Shipwreck - Virg**

Sometimes I wonder if our relationship will end in nothing but a shipwreck, with one or both of us dead. Then he does something stupid to make me laugh and I realize it doesn't matter. Because I know that if our ship does wreck, he'll be right there beside me.

**#43 - Socks - Nick**

They say the men are the messiest of people in the world. But Virg's socks are mucking about on the floor whilst mine are sleeping in the clothes bin. So…either we're the reverse or everyone's been lying all these years.

**#44 - Sand - Virg**

"I've got sand in places I didn't even know existed!" I shrieked as we came sputtering out of the sea foam. Then Nick grabbed me and purred, "All of your places?" in my ear in a hot voice. After that I didn't mind the sand so much.

**#45 - Coin - Nick**

Somehow, someway, this man had gotten one of the coins – one of the same coins that my dad still holds. And he's offering it to me as the only way to save Virg. Fuck that. I'll save her on my own. 'Cause I know that not every Denarian is like Dad's.

**#46 - Guile - Virg**

Nick isn't so good at guile. He tried it once upon a time and after we _still_ ended up having to kick a door in no matter how we tried not to, he decided that he was going to leave all of that to me from now on.

**#47 - Eyelash - Nick**

She batted her eyelashes coyly at my across the table as she slid one bare foot up my leg underneath it. I ended up choking on my drink because of it and my dad pounded me on my back as Virg giggled.

**#48 - Drive - Virg**

When I told him to put his foot to the floor and drive, I wasn't meaning for him to go 100mph and attract every cop for ten blocks to chase us. Though having that many cops chase him does make Nick able to get to where shit's about to go down really fast.

**#49 - Net - Nick**

She just came out of nowhere one day when we were twelve and hugged me, all elbows and knees with her hair still its natural brown. After that day, she entrapped me in a net of friendship and strangeness that brought me to love her.

**#50 - Destination - Virg**

I don't know where our lives our going or how long we'll be together. But I know that so long as we're together, Nick and I will always end up at the same destination.


End file.
